Welcome to the How to Love Yourself No Matter What podcast with Amanda Hess. In this episode, Amanda dives deep into a topic so many of us struggle with: feeling responsible for everyone around us. If you’re the person everyone relies on, the peacekeeper holding it all together, or someone who’s secretly exhausted but scared to stop, this episode is for you.

Drawing from her personal experiences and work as a certified life coach, Amanda unpacks why so many women feel trapped by the belief that they must be the strong one, and how this thinking leads to burnout, resentment, and the loss of self. She explores both societal and personal conditioning that teaches women to prioritize everyone else’s needs above their own and gets candid about the physical, emotional, and mental toll this takes.

But Amanda doesn’t stop there—she offers practical strategies for breaking this cycle, including the power of tiny acts of self-care, regulating your nervous system, emotional processing, and the radical act of putting yourself at the top of your own list. If you’re ready to set healthier boundaries, stop overfunctioning, and reclaim your sense of self, tune in and join Amanda as she shares the tools and mindset shifts you need to let go of what was never yours to carry.

Let’s get started on the path to freedom, fulfillment, and self-love—one small shift at a time.

Timestamps:

00:00 "The Burden of Being Strong"

03:48 "Conditioned to Prioritize Others' Needs"

07:04 Balancing Parenthood, Career, and Life

12:13 The Anxiety of Unwarranted Responsibility

15:34 Fear of Setting Boundaries

19:21 Begin Processing Personal Emotions

24:09 "Prioritize Personal Boundaries, Self-Care"

25:08 "Embrace Change for Personal Fulfillment"

30:03 "Free Week: Let Go & Transform"

Get 1 week absolutely FREE in the Love Yourself No Matter What Membership. Go HERE: joinamanda.ca

Interested in working with Amanda? Sign up for a discovery call: https://amandahess.ca

Want to join the Love Yourself No Matter What Membership For Free? Join here: https://amanda-hess.mykajabi.com/loveyourself?preview_theme_id=2160502340

Come find me on TT and IG: @theamandahess

If you’ve ever felt like you just can’t handle rejection, this episode is for you. Amanda Hess dives deep into rejection sensitivity—what it is, where it comes from, and how it affects the way we think and feel, especially for those who are neurodivergent or have experienced trauma.

Key Takeaways:

What is rejection sensitivity?
Amanda discusses how rejection sensitivity is the tendency to feel real or perceived rejection more intensely than others, leading to heightened emotions, misreading social cues, and sometimes overreacting to neutral interactions.

Why are some people more sensitive?
Neurodivergence, trauma, and constant invalidation can train us to expect rejection, often resulting in masking behaviors and self-doubt.

How does it show up?
Rejection sensitivity can ebb and flow depending on emotional capacity—think stress levels, sleep, confidence, and life events. When we’re vulnerable, small rejections can feel overwhelming and lead to negative thought spirals.

Recognizing emotional bias:
Amanda explains the difference between “clean pain” (the immediate feeling) and “dirty pain” (the stories we tell ourselves about what rejection means), and how the latter keeps us stuck.

Regulating your response:
Instead of trying to avoid or tolerate rejection, Amanda encourages listeners to grow their capacity for it. This means grounding yourself, breathing, and reminding yourself that rejection is just a feeling, not a confirmation of unworthiness.

A personal example:
Amanda shares a story about navigating tense conversations in her son’s basketball team group chat and how perspective can change emotional reactions.

Practical advice:
If rejection sensitivity is getting in your way, try to pause, notice your thought patterns, and ask yourself what else could be true. Focus on expanding your tolerance rather than avoiding difficult feelings.

Join the conversation:
Amanda offers support through her coaching membership, with live coaching calls, daily written coaching, and a private podcast. If you need more personalized help, you can book a free consultation.

Connect:

Join the membership: joinamanda.ca

Book a free call: amandahess.ca/bookacall

If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a review—it helps the podcast grow and reach more women like you!

Interested in working with Amanda? Sign up for a discovery call: https://amandahess.ca

Want to join the Love Yourself No Matter What Membership For Free? Join here: https://amanda-hess.mykajabi.com/loveyourself?preview_theme_id=2160502340

Come find me on TT and IG: @theamandahess

We say we want peace, but what we really need is emotional safety—the ability to be with ourselves, feel any emotion, and know we can handle it.

This 18-minute episode dives into a truth that’s often overlooked in the self-help world. Peace isn’t about having a quiet life—it’s about having a strong inner world.

🧠 Timestamps & Key Takeaways:

00:00 – 01:45
📍 Why “peace” isn’t what you think it is
Amanda shares how this episode—originally recorded for private clients—turns into a universal message. The most common client request? “I just want peace.” But what does that really mean?

01:46 – 04:40
📍 Peace vs. Emotional Safety
Peace is a feeling, not a destination. It’s unique to everyone and often fleeting. Amanda explains how emotional safety—knowing you can handle any emotion—is what actually creates sustainable peace.

04:41 – 07:30
📍 What you're really asking for when you say “peace”
You’re probably trying to escape the overthinking, the mental tug-of-war. Amanda reframes this as a call for quieting the mind through emotional safety—not resisting your emotions, but allowing them.

07:31 – 10:30
📍 How to recognize and work with difficult emotions like loneliness
Using vivid metaphors (like the fluttering bird in your chest), Amanda explains how to stop resisting emotions like loneliness and instead become curious about what they’re telling you.

10:31 – 13:00
📍 Creating emotional safety starts with nervous system regulation
Peace isn’t found in a bubble bath—it’s in a plan. Amanda gets real about regulating your nervous system throughoutyour day, not just when it’s convenient.

13:01 – 15:00
📍 Allowing emotions in your body—not thinking your way out
Self-help often tries to logic away emotions. Amanda explains why feeling them in your body is more powerful, and shares what anxiety feels like for her—plus how she softens it.

15:01 – 16:30
📍 Rewriting the story in your mind
You don’t have to stay stuck in “I can’t” or “I’m too busy.” Amanda shows how to start shifting your inner dialogue to one that supports your growth.

16:31 – 18:00
📍 Nobody’s coming to save you—and that’s good news
You are your own hero. Amanda wraps up with a powerful message about self-responsibility, self-trust, and building the life you actually want.

👋 Ready to take this work deeper?
🔹 Try my membership FREE for a week: joinamanda.ca
🔹 Book a free discovery call: amandahess.ca

And if this episode spoke to you, leave a review. It helps this podcast grow—and it helps more women hear the message they’ve been waiting for.

Interested in working with Amanda? Sign up for a discovery call: https://amandahess.ca

Want to join the Love Yourself No Matter What Membership For Free? Join here: https://amanda-hess.mykajabi.com/loveyourself?preview_theme_id=2160502340

Come find me on TT and IG: @theamandahess

Burnout isn’t just being tired or overwhelmed—it’s what happens when your nervous system is totally tapped out. This episode is a wake-up call and a reframe. I break down what burnout really is, what it’s not, and how to start healing without adding more pressure to your already packed plate.

[00:00–01:25]
📍 Let's reframe burnout
I kick things off by calling out the biggest misunderstanding about burnout: we think it’s situational, but the truth is deeper. Burnout is when your nervous system says, “I’m done.” It's not weakness—it's a stress overload.

[01:26–03:20]
🔥 Burnout vs. "nervous breakdown"
I talk about how burnout used to be labeled a nervous breakdown, and why that language matters. It’s about capacity, not capability. Burnout is your body's way of saying something's not working.

[03:21–05:10]
🚫 People-pleasing & the cost of “playing nice”
If you’re saying yes when you want to say no, avoiding boundaries, and putting everyone else first, this is your burnout blueprint. I walk through how saying “yes” at the expense of yourself leads to emotional depletion.

[05:11–07:45]
🌪️ The real burnout trigger: a fried nervous system
What looks like anxiety, panic, and sleeplessness often comes down to nervous system dysregulation. I compare it to skipping flossing—eventually the buildup causes pain. We need daily emotional hygiene.

[07:46–09:35]
💡 How to start regulating your nervous system
This isn’t about meditating more or walking it off. I explain how real nervous system regulation is consistent, intentional, and doable. I share the first tool you can try today: my 5-minute reset (and how to get it).

[09:36–11:20]
⚖️ Capacity & emotion: how to hold more
Think about how you feel after vacation vs. after a sleepless night. Emotional capacity changes, and we can build it intentionally. This section is about how we make allowing emotion easier.

[11:21–13:00]
🧠 Thoughts, beliefs & the mental load
Burnout isn’t just emotional—there’s a mental component too. I talk about how the belief that you’re responsible for everything and everyone fuels burnout and why it’s time to challenge that.

[13:01–15:00]
💬 Where to start & how I can help
I wrap with two options for going deeper: book a discovery call with me at amandahess.ca or join my Love Yourself No Matter What membership for free at joinamanda.ca. Plus, how to reach me for the free 5-minute reset.

Interested in working with Amanda? Sign up for a discovery call: https://amandahess.ca

Want to join the Love Yourself No Matter What Membership For Free? Join here: https://amanda-hess.mykajabi.com/loveyourself?preview_theme_id=2160502340

Come find me on TT and IG: @theamandahess

This episode is more than a conversation—it’s a reclamation.

LT Dixon joins me to share a deeply personal, powerful journey of healing, self-discovery, and radical self-love. From surviving abuse to raising five kids as a single mom, LT didn't just rebuild her life—she reinvented her identity.

Together, we explore what it actually means to put yourself first without guilt, why so many women feel resistance to loving themselves, and how to start operating from a completely new paradigm—where self-love isn’t optional, it’s foundational.

You’ll walk away with tangible wisdom, loving truth bombs, and a fresh perspective on what it means to be love, lead with love, and build a life from the inside out.

Whether you’re at the start of your healing journey or deep in the process of remembering who you are—you’ll find resonance here.

0:00 – Welcome + introducing my first guest in this self-love series
2:15 – LT’s story: healing from abuse and rediscovering herself
6:45 – “It started with a cup of coffee”: the smallest act of self-love that changed everything
10:30 – The moment she said, “This can’t be my life”—and why that question matters
14:55 – How to ask, ‘Where am I?’ and why this is the most powerful place to begin
19:30 – Redefining love on your own terms: acceptance, appreciation, no judgment
24:10 – LT’s “me, we, them” framework and how it transformed her family
29:50 – What to do when you feel resistance to loving yourself
33:40 – Setting boundaries without guilt—and how it’s a form of love
37:20 – Why healing isn’t about being perfect—it’s about being honest
41:10 – Final takeaways + where to find LT online

📱 TikTok: @getyourshifttogether
SM: IG: L.T. Dixon

Connect with Amanda:
Get a FREE week inside the Love Yourself No Matter What Membership:
https://amanda-hess.mykajabi.com/loveyourself
TT/IG/FB @theamandahess

Interested in working with Amanda? Sign up for a discovery call: https://amandahess.ca

Want to join the Love Yourself No Matter What Membership For Free? Join here: https://amanda-hess.mykajabi.com/loveyourself?preview_theme_id=2160502340

Come find me on TT and IG: @theamandahess

Ever feel like nobody truly sees you or hears you—like you’re speaking, but it’s not landing? In this episode, I’m sharing a personal story that cracked this experience wide open for me. If you’re neurodivergent, highly sensitive, or just someone who’s been labeled as “too much,” this is going to resonate deeply. We’ll explore what it actually means to feel unseen and unheard, why this is such a common experience (especially for women like us), and how to begin rewriting that story from the inside out.

🧠 Here’s what we cover:

[00:00] – Welcome & why this topic matters
[01:30] – A real-life moment with my husband that brought up deep feelings of being unheard
[04:15] – How I reacted (and what I used to do before I had the tools I do now)
[07:00] – The shame spiral that used to follow, and why I don’t go there anymore
[09:20] – Why neurodivergent women are often misunderstood and mislabeled
[11:40] – A poolside story with my dad’s wife that triggered old beliefs and shame
[14:30] – How hiding parts of ourselves contributes to feeling invisible
[16:50] – Why you have to see yourself before anyone else can
[18:40] – What it means to be your own ride or die
[20:00] – How to build connection, support, and belonging—on your terms
[22:10] – The two ways to work with me if you’re ready to finally feel seen and heard

💥 Ready to feel truly seen and heard in your life?

→ Book a 1:1 consult with me here: https://amandahess.ca
→ Join my membership and start your FREE week here: https://joinamanda.ca

You deserve to take up space. Let’s do this together. 💛

Interested in working with Amanda? Sign up for a discovery call: https://amandahess.ca

Want to join the Love Yourself No Matter What Membership For Free? Join here: https://amanda-hess.mykajabi.com/loveyourself?preview_theme_id=2160502340

Come find me on TT and IG: @theamandahess

Do you ever find yourself holding back from feeling hope—because deep down, you're afraid of being disappointed, let down, or even embarrassed? You're not alone. In this episode, we explore how learning to build emotional capacity for hope is essential to living a life that feels meaningful, connected, and aligned with who you really are.

You'll learn why hope isn't just a feel-good emotion—it’s a vital ingredient for mental and emotional wellbeing. If you're sensitive, neurodivergent, or simply someone who’s been hurt before, hope can feel risky. But avoiding it? That leads to a life that gets smaller and less satisfying over time. This episode will show you a new way.

We’ll walk through a clear 3-step process for expanding your emotional capacity so that you can open yourself back up to dreaming, desiring, and pursuing the things that actually matter to you. You’ll leave with practical tools, journaling prompts, and a challenge to help you reconnect with possibility—on your own terms.

[0:00 - 3:00] – Why This Matters More Than Ever
A powerful reminder of what’s possible when you allow yourself to feel hope—and what’s at stake when you don’t.

[3:01 - 6:50] – Why Hope Feels Unsafe for So Many Women
Understand the hidden ways you’ve been taught to shut down your dreams and why hope can feel like a risk rather than a resource.

[6:51 - 10:00] – The “Realism” Trap & How It Shrinks Your Life
Explore how being “realistic” often becomes code for “settling”—and how to know if you’ve fallen into that trap.

[10:01 - 14:15] – What Happens When You Avoid Hope
Discover the quiet cost of choosing safety over possibility and how it shows up in your relationships, career, and self-worth.

[14:16 - 18:30] – The Behaviors That Numb Hope—and Why They Don’t Work
From resentment to numbing to self-sabotage, we unpack the habits that develop when you shut out hope—and how to shift them.

[18:31 - 22:00] – What Emotional Capacity Really Is (And Why You Need It)
Learn what it means to actually build your emotional capacity—not just tolerate more stress—and how this changes everything.

[22:01 - 27:00] – The 3-Step Framework for Building Capacity for Hope

Regulate your nervous system

Allow emotions (instead of avoiding them)

Shift your thought patterns with powerful questions
You'll get concrete tools and journaling prompts to start implementing today.

[27:01 - 29:00] – How Avoiding Pain Also Blocks Joy
Understand how protecting yourself from difficult emotions is also limiting your ability to feel joy, connection, and satisfaction.

[29:01 - End] – Your Next Step: Practice Hope, On Purpose
Take on a simple challenge to practice hopeful thinking in the next 24 hours—and learn how you can get deeper support, totally free, through the Love Yourself No Matter What Membership. Head to joinamanda.ca to try it out with no strings attached.

Let me know if you’d like this turned into a blog post, an email, or a caption too—I’ve got you.

Interested in working with Amanda? Sign up for a discovery call: https://amandahess.ca

Want to join the Love Yourself No Matter What Membership For Free? Join here: https://amanda-hess.mykajabi.com/loveyourself?preview_theme_id=2160502340

Come find me on TT and IG: @theamandahess

In this episode, I thoughtfully explore the importance of making peace with our past selves as a key element of self-love and personal growth. Through my own personal experiences and insights, I share how embracing compassion toward past versions of ourselves, rather than judging or rejecting them, allows for genuine healing and deeper self-understanding. Recognizing our past selves as doing their best with the knowledge and resources they had at the time helps free us from lingering regret or shame. Ultimately, cultivating this understanding creates a more authentic, peaceful, and fulfilling life.

Interested in working with Amanda? Sign up for a discovery call: https://amandahess.ca

Want to join the Love Yourself No Matter What Membership For Free? Join here: https://amanda-hess.mykajabi.com/loveyourself?preview_theme_id=2160502340

Come find me on TT and IG: @theamandahess