In the fall of 2023, Mackenzie Galloway-Cole was living out her rom-com-worthy love story with her wife Megan in New York City. Then, on an ordinary night in November, Megan collapsed and died a few hours later from a sudden cardiac event. In the aftermath, Mackenzie had to find her way in this newly shattered world without Megan, her anchor and biggest cheerleader.

Mackenzie reflects on the shock of becoming a young widow, the added layers of grief that come with queer partner loss, and the painful realities of navigating death care systems that often default to heteronormative assumptions.

Together, Jana and Mackenzie talk about the isolating nature of sudden and unexplained death, the importance of finding people who "get it," and the ways time itself becomes a particularly painful aspect of grief. Mackenzie also shares why New Year's can feel like a uniquely brutal grief milestone, how absence accumulates as life continues, and how Megan's love still shapes the way she takes care of herself today.

This conversation holds space for heartbreak, dark humor, love stories, and the not-so-quiet ways grief rewires daily life - especially when the person you most want to turn to is the one who died.

In this episode, we discuss:

• The story of how Megan and Mackenzie met and fell in love
• Sudden death and the trauma of an ordinary day turning catastrophic
• The intersection of being a young, gay widow
• Navigating hospitals, funeral homes, and death administration as a queer spouse
• Why the small, everyday moments can hurt more than the big ones
• How the second Christmas can feel even harder than the first
• New Year's as a "sneaky" grief holiday
• How the choices you make in life can reflect and honor your person who died

Mackenzie Galloway-Cole writes about grief at Good Gay Grief on Substack and can also be found on Instagram at @deadwifeclub

When Hilary was 18, her oldest sister, Kelly, died from a rare cancer called DSRCT (desmoplastic small round cell tumor). In the same year, Hilary left for college and her parents divorced - three life-altering events that reshaped her relationships, sense of stability, and the early years of adulthood.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Growing up as the youngest of three sisters and the creative, nurturing bond she shared with Kelly
• Navigating Kelly's diagnosis, treatment, and death while still in high school
• Trying to appear "fine" in college while carrying immense grief
• The ways her family dynamics shifted after Kelly's death and her parents' divorce
• How grief continued to evolve across developmental stages, from early adulthood into her mid-30s
• The unexpected moments - like baking bread or bringing home a new pet – that bring new waves of grief
• How her experience shaped her work as a therapist supporting others in pain

Hilary also shares what she wishes she had known about grief at 18, how exhausting it can be, and how she learned to make space for grief that shows up differently over time.

When Cassie arrived at Dougy Center for her first peer grief support group for young adults after her dad died, she sat in the parking lot wondering if she could even walk inside. When she did, she found people her age who understood what it meant to have a parent die - people who would end up shaping her life in ways she never imagined. In this episode, Cassie talks about how grief changed her, what it was like to find community in a peer support group, and how those friendships continue to support her years later. Now, as a volunteer facilitator in a peer grief support group for children, Cassie reflects on what it means to come full circle - turning the care she received into care she now offers others.

We Discuss:

• The early days and weeks after her dad's death
• How grief can be physically painful
• Finding connection and laughter in a support group
• Building lifelong friendships with people who "get it"
• Learning to make space for grief on purpose
• The importance of rituals and traditions
• What it's like to return as a volunteer to support children who are grieving
• The unexpected gifts of friendship Cassie's discovered in grief

Learn more about Dougy Center's peer grief support groups and resources for Young Adults ages 18-40.

When you're grieving, "Take care of yourself," might be the last thing you want to hear. So what does self-care actually look like for a parent or caregiver who is grieving? Rebecca Hobbs-Lawrence, MA, who coordinates the Pathways Program at Dougy Center for families facing an advanced serious illness, joins us to share practical tools for caregivers who are trying to balance taking care of others with tending to themselves, along with crucial advice for friends and family who want to provide truly meaningful support.

We discuss:

• The many roles caregivers hold before and after a death

• Balancing others' needs while grieving yourself

• How adults and kids experience grief differently

• When the surviving parent had a complicated relationship with the person who died

• Simple, doable self-care for caregivers

• What real, helpful support looks like from friends and community

• Learning how to ask for and accept help

Rebecca Hobbs-Lawrence, M.A., is the Pathways Program & Grief Services Coordinator at Dougy Center, The National Grief Center for Children & Families.