In this bold, heartfelt, and hilariously honest episode, Thomas dives deep into the powerful realization that your truth doesn’t need to be applauded to be valid.

With wisdom, wit, and a touch of science, he unpacks how approval-seeking can quietly hijack your identity—and what it really costs when you silence your truth to fit in.

Drawing from his memoir Little Fag, Thomas shares a raw story of growing up gay in a world that demanded perfection, and the freedom he found when he finally chose authenticity over approval.

You’ll also get a 5-question “Approval Inventory,” a truth-telling daily practice, and a gentle but fierce reminder that living your truth is one of the most radical acts of self-love.

This is your permission slip to stop performing and start breathing.

A Gentle Note Before You Begin to Listen

This space holds truth—and sometimes, truth is tender.

The story I share here includes reflections on suicidal thoughts and lived experiences with mental health struggles. If this is a sensitive subject for you, please honor your heart as you read or listen. You have full permission to pause, skip, or return when it feels safe.

You are not alone.

Your well-being matters more than any story.

If you or someone you love is struggling, I encourage you to reach out to a trusted support, therapist, or crisis resource in your area. There is help. There is hope. And there is healing.

With deep respect for your journey —

Welcome. Please begin when you’re ready.

Start with How You Failed

In this episode of Conversations with Thomas, we flip the script on how we usually measure success. Thomas invites us to start by sharing our failures—the messy, mortifying, oh-shit moments we’d rather keep hidden. Because when we tell the truth about how we fell down, we give ourselves and others permission to get back up.

Drawing from his own life—like the day he almost ended it all at Bow Falls in Calgary—Thomas shares how failing to take his own life became his biggest triumph. That failure woke him up to the power of living, to the fierce desire to turn pain into purpose. And he reminds us: failure isn’t the end—it’s the forge that shapes us.

Alongside personal stories and scientific insights (like how the brain’s error-monitoring system actually helps us grow), Thomas weaves in humor and heart, showing us that failure is life’s way of recalculating the route.

He also shares how his own “coaching misfires” became the catalyst for authentic, human-centered connection—and extends an invitation to listeners to explore the gold in their own failures.

So, take a deep breath and join Thomas in this brave conversation. Because in the end, our failures aren’t proof we’re unworthy. They’re reminders we’re alive, we’re learning, and we’re loved.

Let your failure become the compass that points you to what matters most.

Best for: Humans. Especially the ones trying really hard not to be.

Ever felt like a beautiful disaster wrapped in a hoodie of self-doubt? Good. You’re in the right place. In this heart-cracking, belly-laughing episode, Thomas explores the liberating concept of being flawsome—that sacred sweet spot where your mess meets your magic. Popularized by Timber Hawkeye in The Opposite of Namaste, flawsome is about embracing your imperfections not as liabilities, but as your own weird and wonderful superpowers.

Thomas serves up soulful insight, relatable stories, a little science (just enough to impress your therapist), and a real-world practice you can do without needing to sage your house or solve your childhood trauma in one go. You'll meet flawsome legends like da Vinci, Lucille Ball, and Mr. Rogers—and also hear about that time Thomas accidentally called himself a "life couch" at a speaking gig. #TrulyIconic

This episode is perfect for:

• Anyone who’s tired of pretending they’ve got it all together

• Recovering perfectionists

• Folks still figuring-it-out

• Anyone who’s ever autocorrected their “inner growth” into something much less holy

• People who find Rumi and ridiculous real-life moments equally healing

Come for the laughs, stay for the radical self-acceptance—and leave knowing you don’t have to be flawless to be fabulous.