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Connection Codes

Connection Codes

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We often find ourselves stuck in a cycle of miscommunication and frustration. We don't know how to convey how we feel OR we burst out and create even more pain. Dr. Glenn & Phyllis Hill have spent years researching human connection and how to break that cycle. The Connection Codes is the guide to helping couples conquer conflict and it is the tool to break the cycle of pain and live in peace together. Hosted by Tera Wages of the I Get It podcast. For free resources to a better marriage go to https://www.connectioncodes.co/Connection Codes Desarrollo Personal Éxito Personal
Episodios
  • "I'm So Lonely in This Relationship": When Your Partner Can't See Your Pain with Zephan & Sarah McMinn (181)

    "I'm So Lonely in This Relationship": When Your Partner Can't See Your Pain with Zephan & Sarah McMinn (181)
    Sep 2 2025
    For nearly two decades, Zephan and Sarah's marriage was in "survival mode". On the surface, everything seemed "fine," but underneath, a painful disconnect was growing—one partner felt "particularly lonely," while the other "had no idea". A pivotal moment during a podcast recording led to an emotional "dam break," forcing them to confront years of unspoken pain. In this episode, Zephan and Sarah share their powerful journey of moving beyond a "people pleaser" dynamic and ineffective relationship "rules". They discuss navigating the chaotic first six months—a period they call "Pandora's Box"—to build a foundation of true emotional safety and transform their communication, learning how to become a true "witness for your life".Chapters:00:00:00 - Welcome to the Connection Codes Podcast00:03:16 - Meet Zephan & Sarah00:04:12 - Why Connection Codes Was Different: How it became a "way of life," not just a quick fix.00:05:13 - The First 10 Years: Reflecting on the intensity and "survival mode" of early marriage.00:06:11 - The Turning Point: A failed podcast recording reveals one partner's hidden pain.00:08:43 - Defining Connection: The pain caused by differing views on what connection looks like.00:09:36 - The People-Pleaser Dynamic: How managing a partner's emotions prevents intimacy.00:10:30 - The Problem with "Rules": Why rule-based methodologies for relationships often fail.00:11:08 - The Core Principle of Safety: The commitment to "be safe for one another."00:13:37 - The "Dam Break" of Loneliness: Finding the language to define loneliness within the marriage.00:15:12 - Learning to "Ooh" a Partner's Pain: Validating a partner without taking on their pain as shame.00:15:53 - Seeing "Micro-Resisting": Noticing the pattern of people resisting each other's emotions.00:16:56 - The Journey of Oohing Yourself: Not resisting your own emotions as a path to self-discovery.00:22:39 - Finding Your Voice: How a safe group environment helps in sharing difficult emotions.00:23:58 - A New Way to Argue: Moving from "I'm not enough" to "I'm feeling lonely."00:29:41 - The "Pandora's Box" Phase: The scary and difficult first six months of doing the work.00:31:05 - How to Navigate Early Stages: Advice on staying curious to find connection at the bottom of the pain.00:36:40 - The Vital Role of Community: How supportive friends were essential to their journey.00:38:43 - A Partner as a "Witness": The profound purpose of a committed partnership.00:41:31 - Core Emotion Wheel Practice: The couple shares their current emotions using the wheel exercise.00:45:55 - Connecting with the Guests: How to find Zephan and Sarah for coaching.Links and Resources:Download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@connectioncodes?si=phORYBsGMOOrj9mA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out how to become a Certified Coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/certified-coaching⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find a coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu⁠Haven Coaching Website: https://www.havencoaching.net/homeHaven Coaching on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thehavencoaching/
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    48 m
  • Why No One Is Too Young to Learn Emotional Intelligence: A Conversation with Asher Hill (180)

    Why No One Is Too Young to Learn Emotional Intelligence: A Conversation with Asher Hill (180)
    Aug 26 2025

    Dr. Glenn and Phyllis Hill welcome their grandson, Asher Hill, to share his journey of learning and practicing the Connection Codes Core Emotion Wheel from a young age. That foundation became life-saving when, at just 14 years old, he was hit with the emotional weight of his mother’s cancer diagnosis. Now 16, Asher reflects on how this tool has carried him through high school pressures, football struggles, panic attacks, and family conflicts—and even how he uses it with his girlfriend to build a safe, honest relationship. His story proves that emotional intelligence isn’t just for adults—no one is too young to learn it—and that authentic communication and safe spaces for vulnerability can transform every relationship, from family to friendships to future partnerships.


    Chapters:

    (00:00:00) Introduction & Disclaimer(00:02:59) Meet Asher(00:05:14) Why Asher is on the Podcast(00:06:59) Early Memories of Connection Codes(00:08:06) Cousin Conflict(00:10:38) The "Three Sentences" Rule(00:12:56) The Core Emotion Wheel as a "Game Changer"(00:15:56) Learning as We Go(00:19:12) A Cousin-Led Resolution(00:21:44) Navigating a Mother's Illness(00:26:28) Emotional Suppression as a Coping Mechanism(00:27:32) Inhale, Exhale: The Flow of Emotions(00:29:07) The Gym Analogy for Emotions(00:30:44) The Weight of Unprocessed Feelings(00:36:11) Asher's Core Emotion Wheel(00:38:23) Using the Wheel in a Relationship

    Links and Resources:

    • Download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@connectioncodes?si=phORYBsGMOOrj9mA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
    • Find out how to become a Certified Coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/certified-coaching⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
    • Find a coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu⁠⁠⁠
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    43 m
  • The Role of Vulnerability in Personal Growth (179)

    The Role of Vulnerability in Personal Growth (179)
    Aug 19 2025

    In this heartfelt episode, we explore the transformative power of vulnerability in personal growth. Join us as Hannah Droll shares her journey of embracing vulnerability through Connection Codes, revealing how it reshaped her relationships and self-awareness. Discover the challenges and triumphs of staying present in moments of emotional intensity, and learn how vulnerability can lead to deeper connections and personal transformation. Tune in to uncover the profound impact of being open and authentic in your own life.
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    49 m
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Great topics for relationships to understand the underlying emotions. Helps you to know others couples are experiencing similar situations. You are not alone.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you don’t still have the emotional pain.

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