What comes to mind when someone brings up 12-Step recovery?

Maybe you think of Alcoholics Anonymous?

Or perhaps group meetings?

Do you also wonder if 12-Step programs are only for those who don’t see Jesus as Savior and Lord of all?

Should followers of Christ consider participating, even if Jesus isn't the central focus?

There are certainly some common misconceptions about where the original twelve steps come from and how they are meant to be used.

Today, we’ll look at a few of the most prevalent misunderstandings surrounding this simple yet effective program for addiction recovery and discover if these twelve steps are a clear path to God.

We pray this blesses you,

Johnny and Emily

💜Work with us! coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Hang out with us and support our ministry on Patreon, beyondbrokenvows.com/partner

💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe

RESOURCES:

Request the Healing Apology worksheet, support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Download our e-book, “9 Steps to Healing After Sexual Betrayal: For Couples Who Have Chosen to Stay Married”

Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)

RELATED EPISODES:

Episode 25.Persistent Sexual Integrity Issues in Marriage. Do Recovery Programs Really Work?

Episode 49. Sobriety vs. Recovery After Porn-Fueled Infidelity

NEXT STEPS:

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✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast.

✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Today we wrap up our series, I Need You Where I AM. In the first episode of our series, we focused on a statement that many betrayed wives relate to, "My Husband Just Doesn’t 'Get It'.”

And what is the “it” he’s not getting? Not understanding the magnitude of what his actions through infidelity have done to her.

In the second episode in our series, we covered some of the ways betrayed wives are affected by their husband’s infidelity. Not the least of which is grief. But in an everyday way, it can look like experiencing new health issues, being triggered by movies, TV shows, music, and even reading the Bible.

Today we are giving husbands hope for addressing his wife’s needs in a practical way. To help Johnny see past himself to how Emily was being affected by his sexual betrayal, he created a process to handle her big emotions based on an internal statement, My wife feels this way because…

Join us for the rest of the statement plus 4 important things it does to help both spouses heal.

We pray this blesses you,

Johnny and Emily

💜Work with us! coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Hang out with us and support our ministry on Patreon, beyondbrokenvows.com/partner

💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe

RESOURCES:

Request the Healing Apology worksheet, support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Download our e-book, “9 Steps to Healing After Sexual Betrayal: For Couples Who Have Chosen to Stay Married”

Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)

RELATED EPISODES:

Episode 119. I Need You Where I Am: Why Unfaithful Husbands Just Don’t Get It (Series 1 of 3)

Episode 120. I Need You Where I Am: Infidelity's Surprising Effects for Her (Series 2 of 3)

NEXT STEPS:

✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!

✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast.

✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Today in the second installment of our series, I Need You Where I Am, we turn the spotlight fully onto the wreckage inside a wife’s body and soul after sexual betrayal.

The physical, emotional, and spiritual effects of betrayal trauma are real and profound. A wife experiencing these effects may think she is going crazy. She is not. It just feels that way.

As we talked about last week, a husband who “gets it” understands the magnitude of the effects of his betrayal on his wife. This man can show compassion and empathy by looking past his own situation to see his wife’s pain.

In this episode, we will share our experience with the effects of betrayal trauma as well as hope for the future where the trauma is healed and life becomes new.

We pray this blesses you,

Johnny and Emily

💜Work with us! coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Hang out with us and support our ministry on Patreon, beyondbrokenvows.com/partner

💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe

RESOURCES:

Request the Healing Apology worksheet, support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Download our e-book, “9 Steps to Healing After Sexual Betrayal: For Couples Who Have Chosen to Stay Married”

Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)

RELATED EPISODES:

Episode 22. How Long Will This Hurt? Experiencing The 5 Stages of Grief Through the Lens of Sexual Betrayal

Episode 119. I Need You Where I Am: Why Unfaithful Husbands Just Don’t Get It (Series 1 of 3)

NEXT STEPS:

✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!

✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast.

✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Today we want to speak to both spouses who are bravely navigating the deep and challenging waters following a discovery and disclosure of sexual betrayal.

We understand that this emotional journey can feel overwhelming and may be difficult to sort out on your own.

Today we’re excited to present a relatable word-picture that aims to make the experience of a husband’s infidelity a little easier to understand for both partners.

This episode marks the beginning of a 3-part series designed specifically for betrayed wives, focusing on what they wish their unfaithful husbands could grasp after their world has been shattered by the revelation of infidelity.

We pray this blesses you,

Johnny and Emily

💜Work with us! coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Hang out with us and support our ministry on Patreon, beyondbrokenvows.com/partner

💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe

RESOURCES:

Request the Healing Apology worksheet, support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Download our e-book, “9 Steps to Healing After Sexual Betrayal: For Couples Who Have Chosen to Stay Married”

Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)

RELATED EPISODES:

Episode 52. What Is His Response To Her BIG Emotions After Porn-Fueled Infidelity?

Episode 64. 64 | 5 Things a Betrayed Wife Needs From Her Recovering Husband (Series)

NEXT STEPS:

✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!

✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast.

✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Recovery work is hard! It is not something that either spouse ever wanted and sometimes it can feel like it takes over everything else in life. Is it okay to take breaks from the difficult conversations and the grieving process?

Yes! We all need to take a break from the struggle occasionally and recharge so we can get back in and do the next right thing.

We have a shorter show today, but lots of encouragement! Please take a moment to receive a blessing as we share a beautiful passage of scripture that quiets our souls and helps us to rest in the Lord.

We are praying for you,

Johnny and Emily

💜Work with us! coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Hang out with us and support our ministry on Patreon, beyondbrokenvows.com/partner

💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe

RESOURCES:

Request the Healing Apology worksheet, support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Download our e-book, “9 Steps to Healing After Sexual Betrayal: For Couples Who Have Chosen to Stay Married”

Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)

RELATED EPISODES:

Episode 100. Getting Real Help for Your Marriage: 10 Obstacles to Counseling and Coaching

Episode 113. No Stone Unturned in Recovery from Porn-Fueled Infidelity

NEXT STEPS:

✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!

✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast.

✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

In this episode we are excited to have John-Michael Bout share his powerful testimony of struggling with pornography addiction since the age of eight and how he overcame it through God's grace, supportive friendships, and accountability.

John-Michael also introduces his ministry, Into the Light, which offers various free resources including documentaries, video series, and workbooks to help individuals and families combat pornography and better understand biblical sexuality.

He shares with us the importance of confessing sins, addressing the accessibility of pornography through technology, and integrating these conversations and resources into church communities for broader support and impact.

Pop in your earbuds and listen in for some real help!

We pray this blesses you,

Johnny and Emily

💜Work with us! coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Hang out with us and support our ministry on Patreon, beyondbrokenvows.com/partner

💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe

CONNECT WITH JOHN-MICHAEL:

Website: intothelightministries.ca Socials:@intothelight_ministries Into The Light Podcast

RESOURCES:

Request the Healing Apology worksheet, support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Download our e-book, “9 Steps to Healing After Sexual Betrayal: For Couples Who Have Chosen to Stay Married”

Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)

RELATED EPISODES:

Episode 58. Purpose from Pain: Did Sexual Betrayal Destroy God’s Plan for Your Marriage?

Episode 77. 4 Practical Steps for Vigilance in Recovery from Porn-Fueled Infidelity

NEXT STEPS:

✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!

✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast.

✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

When you hear the word surrender, what comes to mind?

Does it feel like defeat, like giving up?

We often see surrender as weakness. And for those who like to control everything, surrender seems counterintuitive.

Our instinct is to protect ourselves. Both spouses often resist and hide from the painful path to healing.

In a marriage shattered by sexual betrayal, the fear is that giving up control means being taken advantage of or losing importance in the relationship.

But surrendering your marriage to God is not about giving up. It’s about loosening your grip and trusting in someone greater.

When the infidelity bomb blew up our marriage, we were scared and confused, putting up shields to protect ourselves from each other’s pain.

Until, we chose to surrender—not to each other’s flaws, but to God’s plan for us.

When we stopped striving for our own desired outcomes and handed it over to God, everything changed.

Now, God did not erase the pain, but He guided us through it—revealing truths, healing wounds, and rebuilding trust step by step.

In today's episode, we go deep into what it looks like to surrender and how God used this step of faith in our marriage to create something beautiful.

We pray this blesses you,

Johnny and Emily

💜Work with us! coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Hang out with us and support our ministry on Patreon, beyondbrokenvows.com/partner

💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe

RESOURCES:

Request the Healing Apology worksheet, support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Download our e-book, “9 Steps to Healing After Sexual Betrayal: For Couples Who Have Chosen to Stay Married”

Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)

RELATED EPISODES:

Episode 81. Giving Thanks In The Aftermath of Porn-Fueled Infidelity

Episode 72. Praising God While in the Storm of Sexual Betrayal and Porn-Fueled Infidelity

NEXT STEPS:

✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!

✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast.

✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Today we tackle the hardest skill in any marriage - especially after the devastation of sexual betrayal - honest, open communication.

We frame true intimacy as a three-legged stool built on transparency, vulnerability and rigorous honesty, then soften the seat with a cushion of humility so the whole thing doesn’t collapse under the weight of pain and suspicion.

Our goal is to move from theory to practice, from talking about intimacy to living it out daily. That shift requires the right tools. Enter the FANOS Check-In, by Debra Laaser. The acronym FANOS stands for:

Feelings

Affirmations

Needs

Ownership

Struggles/Sobriety.

In this episode, we’ll walk you through how two bruised spouses can sit down, share a safe space on that 3-legged stool, and walk away with clearer hearts, sharper boundaries, and a rebuilt connection.

We pray this blesses you,

Johnny and Emily

💜Work with us! coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Hang out with us and support our ministry on Patreon, beyondbrokenvows.com/partner

💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com

💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe

RESOURCES:

Emotions Wheel

FANOS CHECK-IN

Request the Healing Apology worksheet, support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Download our e-book, “9 Steps to Healing After Sexual Betrayal: For Couples Who Have Chosen to Stay Married”

Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)

RELATED EPISODES:

Episode 10. When “I’m Sorry” Isn’t Enough: 8 Steps to a Healing Apology

Episode 80. 7 Caveats for an Effective Healing Apology

Episode 106. From Furious to Curious: How the ‘Emotions Wheel’ Unlocks Deeper Conversations

NEXT STEPS:

✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!

✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast.

✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.