
Semi-Centurion
What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Funnier!
No se pudo agregar al carrito
Add to Cart failed.
Error al Agregar a Lista de Deseos.
Error al eliminar de la lista de deseos.
Error al añadir a tu biblioteca
Error al seguir el podcast
Error al dejar de seguir el podcast
$0.99/mes por los primeros 3 meses

Compra ahora por $14.95
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrado por:
-
S. David Acuff
-
De:
-
S. David Acuff
Acerca de esta escucha
David Acuff is a Hollywood insider, a military brat, a comic, a piano recital survivor, a BMW murderer, an offensive linebacker, a dog licker, a divorced TikToker, a father of three Jedi princesses, and possibly a child prodigy.
He is also a semi-centurion. That's a word he made up when he turned 50 this year because "quinquagenarian" sounds like a horse disease or a Menudo song. And before he could move on to the next nifty fifty, he wanted to process how he'd lived, laughed, loved, and litigated along the way.
So he wrote this semi-memoir. A semi-memie, let's call it. This is not a self-help book. More of a self-humor. A self-assessment after some self-reflection. Inspired by true self-fiction.
It's a conundrum wrapped in an enigma, like a kitten burrito. This audiobook was written to make God laugh so hard the Holy Spirit comes out his nose. So, if you learn a lesson or get inspired along the way, that's on you, buddy.
Anyway, this hilarious exploratory trip down memory lane taught him a very provocative lesson. What doesn't kill you makes you funnier. You've been warned.
Los oyentes también disfrutaron...
-
Jack & Jack: You Don't Know Jacks
- De: Jack Johnson
- Narrado por: Jack Johnson, Jack Gilinsky
- Duración: 1 h y 18 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Vine ingenues, YouTube megastars, hip-pop sensations, and best friends Jack & Jack bring their own brand of irreverent comedy, on-point style, and heartfelt life advice to You Don't Know Jacks. This is an insider look at the lives of Jack & Jack, as told by the guys themselves.
-
-
jack gilinsky
- De Kate en 11-18-17
De: Jack Johnson
-
Fathers Memorable Jokes
- Dad and His Jokes
- De: Alfie Thomas
- Narrado por: Helpful Matthew
- Duración: 3 h y 51 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
From changing diapers to putting away toys, some parental jobs can be shared–but there is one that only you can master: the dad jokes! Little people are easy to entertain. They will laugh at the cheesy pizza joke that we have all heard a million times. But as children grow up, dads have to up their humor game. Your child might be able to watch their favorite movie a hundred times, but a dad joke can go from funny to old in less than a week. Traditionally, dad jokes will range from hilarious to an eye-rolling cringe. And told the right way to a group, you can get all the reactions in between.
-
-
Super cute!
- De Krystina Rivera en 05-16-24
De: Alfie Thomas
-
Greenlights
- De: Matthew McConaughey
- Narrado por: Matthew McConaughey
- Duración: 6 h y 51 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
I’ve been in this life for fifty years, been trying to work out its riddle for forty-two, and been keeping diaries of clues to that riddle for the last thirty-five. Notes about successes and failures, joys and sorrows, things that made me marvel, and things that made me laugh out loud. How to be fair. How to have less stress. How to have fun. How to hurt people less. How to get hurt less. How to be a good man. How to have meaning in life. How to be more me. Recently, I worked up the courage to sit down with those diaries.
-
-
Love this!
- De Nancy en 10-21-20
-
Stay Sexy & Don’t Get Murdered
- The Definitive How-To Guide
- De: Karen Kilgariff, Georgia Hardstark
- Narrado por: Karen Kilgariff, Georgia Hardstark, Paul Giamatti
- Duración: 6 h y 31 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Sharing never-before-heard stories ranging from their struggles with depression, eating disorders, and addiction, Karen and Georgia irreverently recount their biggest mistakes and deepest fears, reflecting on the formative life events that shaped them into two of the most followed voices in the nation. In Stay Sexy & Don’t Get Murdered, Karen and Georgia focus on the importance of self-advocating and valuing personal safety over being "nice" or "helpful." They delve into their own pasts, true crime stories, and beyond to discuss meaningful issues with empathy and frankness.
-
-
I just really enjoyed Karen crying
- De VOGUEMAG en 05-28-19
De: Karen Kilgariff, y otros
-
Over the Top
- A Raw Journey to Self-Love
- De: Jonathan Van Ness
- Narrado por: Jonathan Van Ness
- Duración: 5 h y 50 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
A laugh-and-cry-out-loud memoir from the beloved star of Netflix’s Queer Eye, Jonathan Van Ness, sharing never-before-told, deeply personal stories of growing up gay, transforming pain into positivity, and embracing what makes you gorgeously different.
-
-
Everything I knew it would be and more.
- De Cookie2703 en 09-24-19
-
Yearbook
- De: Seth Rogen
- Narrado por: Seth Rogen, full cast
- Duración: 6 h y 13 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Hi! I’m Seth! I was asked to describe my audiobook, Yearbook for websites and shit like that, so...here it goes!!! Yearbook is a collection of true stories that I desperately hope are just funny at worst, and life-changingly amazing at best. (I understand that it’s likely the former, which is a fancy “book” way of saying “the first one.”) I talk about my grandparents, doing stand-up comedy as a teenager, bar mitzvahs, and Jewish summer camp, and tell way more stories about doing drugs than my mother would like.
-
-
Good until it turned political
- De atk0623 en 05-20-21
De: Seth Rogen
-
Jack & Jack: You Don't Know Jacks
- De: Jack Johnson
- Narrado por: Jack Johnson, Jack Gilinsky
- Duración: 1 h y 18 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Vine ingenues, YouTube megastars, hip-pop sensations, and best friends Jack & Jack bring their own brand of irreverent comedy, on-point style, and heartfelt life advice to You Don't Know Jacks. This is an insider look at the lives of Jack & Jack, as told by the guys themselves.
-
-
jack gilinsky
- De Kate en 11-18-17
De: Jack Johnson
-
Fathers Memorable Jokes
- Dad and His Jokes
- De: Alfie Thomas
- Narrado por: Helpful Matthew
- Duración: 3 h y 51 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
From changing diapers to putting away toys, some parental jobs can be shared–but there is one that only you can master: the dad jokes! Little people are easy to entertain. They will laugh at the cheesy pizza joke that we have all heard a million times. But as children grow up, dads have to up their humor game. Your child might be able to watch their favorite movie a hundred times, but a dad joke can go from funny to old in less than a week. Traditionally, dad jokes will range from hilarious to an eye-rolling cringe. And told the right way to a group, you can get all the reactions in between.
-
-
Super cute!
- De Krystina Rivera en 05-16-24
De: Alfie Thomas
-
Greenlights
- De: Matthew McConaughey
- Narrado por: Matthew McConaughey
- Duración: 6 h y 51 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
I’ve been in this life for fifty years, been trying to work out its riddle for forty-two, and been keeping diaries of clues to that riddle for the last thirty-five. Notes about successes and failures, joys and sorrows, things that made me marvel, and things that made me laugh out loud. How to be fair. How to have less stress. How to have fun. How to hurt people less. How to get hurt less. How to be a good man. How to have meaning in life. How to be more me. Recently, I worked up the courage to sit down with those diaries.
-
-
Love this!
- De Nancy en 10-21-20
-
Stay Sexy & Don’t Get Murdered
- The Definitive How-To Guide
- De: Karen Kilgariff, Georgia Hardstark
- Narrado por: Karen Kilgariff, Georgia Hardstark, Paul Giamatti
- Duración: 6 h y 31 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Sharing never-before-heard stories ranging from their struggles with depression, eating disorders, and addiction, Karen and Georgia irreverently recount their biggest mistakes and deepest fears, reflecting on the formative life events that shaped them into two of the most followed voices in the nation. In Stay Sexy & Don’t Get Murdered, Karen and Georgia focus on the importance of self-advocating and valuing personal safety over being "nice" or "helpful." They delve into their own pasts, true crime stories, and beyond to discuss meaningful issues with empathy and frankness.
-
-
I just really enjoyed Karen crying
- De VOGUEMAG en 05-28-19
De: Karen Kilgariff, y otros
-
Over the Top
- A Raw Journey to Self-Love
- De: Jonathan Van Ness
- Narrado por: Jonathan Van Ness
- Duración: 5 h y 50 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
A laugh-and-cry-out-loud memoir from the beloved star of Netflix’s Queer Eye, Jonathan Van Ness, sharing never-before-told, deeply personal stories of growing up gay, transforming pain into positivity, and embracing what makes you gorgeously different.
-
-
Everything I knew it would be and more.
- De Cookie2703 en 09-24-19
-
Yearbook
- De: Seth Rogen
- Narrado por: Seth Rogen, full cast
- Duración: 6 h y 13 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Hi! I’m Seth! I was asked to describe my audiobook, Yearbook for websites and shit like that, so...here it goes!!! Yearbook is a collection of true stories that I desperately hope are just funny at worst, and life-changingly amazing at best. (I understand that it’s likely the former, which is a fancy “book” way of saying “the first one.”) I talk about my grandparents, doing stand-up comedy as a teenager, bar mitzvahs, and Jewish summer camp, and tell way more stories about doing drugs than my mother would like.
-
-
Good until it turned political
- De atk0623 en 05-20-21
De: Seth Rogen
-
A Very Punchable Face
- A Memoir
- De: Colin Jost
- Narrado por: Colin Jost
- Duración: 7 h y 41 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
If there’s one trait that makes someone well-suited to comedy, it’s being able to take a punch - metaphorically and, occasionally, physically. Told with a healthy dose of self-deprecation, A Very Punchable Face reveals the brilliant mind behind some of the dumbest sketches on television, and lays bare the heart and humor of a hardworking guy - with a face you can’t help but want to punch.
-
-
Amazing
- De Erin E. Kace en 07-27-20
De: Colin Jost
-
Mixed Plate
- Chronicles of an All-American Combo
- De: Jo Koy
- Narrado por: Jo Koy
- Duración: 8 h y 18 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
A stunning, hilarious memoir displaying Koy’s “wide-ranging comedic talent and abundant wells of perseverance” (Kirkus Reviews, starred). Mixed Plate illuminates the burning drive and unique humor that make Jo Koy one of today’s most successful comedians.
-
-
Good listen, but much profanity
- De M. Kienbaum Aldape en 08-04-21
De: Jo Koy
-
Act Like You Got Some Sense
- And Other Things My Daughters Taught Me
- De: Jamie Foxx
- Narrado por: Jamie Foxx, Corinne Foxx
- Duración: 5 h y 47 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Jamie Foxx has won an Academy Award and a Grammy Award, laughed with sitting presidents, and partied with the biggest names in hip-hop. In Act Like You Got Some Sense, Jamie shares up close and personal stories about the tough love and old-school values he learned growing up in the small town of Terrell, Texas; his early days trying to make it in Hollywood; the joys and challenges of achieving stardom; and how each phase of his life shaped his parenting journey. Hilarious, poignant, and always brutally honest, this is Jamie Foxx like we’ve never seen him before.
-
-
What a Dad
- De Martha Maderal en 10-21-21
De: Jamie Foxx
-
Paddle Your Own Canoe
- One Man's Fundamentals for Delicious Living
- De: Nick Offerman
- Narrado por: Nick Offerman
- Duración: 10 h y 50 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Growing a perfect moustache, grilling red meat, wooing a woman - who better to deliver this tutelage than the always charming, always manly Nick Offerman, best known as Parks and Recreation's Ron Swanson? Combining his trademark comic voice and very real expertise in woodworking - he runs his own woodshop - Paddle Your Own Canoe features tales from Offerman's childhood in small-town Minooka, Illinois, to his theater days in Chicago, beginnings as a carpenter/actor and the hilarious and magnificent seduction of his now-wife Megan Mullally.
-
-
On the need to acknowledge the role luck plays
- De OpenMindedNotCredulous en 11-17-13
De: Nick Offerman
-
Great Falls, MT
- Fast Times, Post-Punk Weirdos, and a Tale of Coming Home Again
- De: Reggie Watts
- Narrado por: Reggie Watts
- Duración: 8 h y 15 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Reggie Watts is weird. But you knew that. Anyone who’s seen his multifaceted, entirely improvised comedy and music shows knows that. Reggie Watts is also from the town of Great Falls, MT. These two facts are not unrelated. Watts grew up in Montana in the ‘80s, half French, half American, half white, half Black, speaking a bunch of different languages and slipping between the orchestra geeks and the football jocks until he finally found a squad of fellow misfits with an affinity for trouble.
-
-
A wizard tells his tale!
- De michael benton en 10-18-23
De: Reggie Watts
-
The Bassoon King
- My Life in Art, Faith, and Idiocy
- De: Rainn Wilson
- Narrado por: Rainn Wilson
- Duración: 8 h y 49 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Rainn Wilson’s memoir about growing up geeky and finally finding his place in comedy, faith, and life. For nine seasons Rainn Wilson played Dwight Schrute, everyone's favorite work nemesis and beet farmer. Viewers of The Office fell in love with the character and grew to love the actor who played him even more. Rainn founded a website and media company, SoulPancake, that eventually became a best-selling book of the same name. He also started a hilarious Twitter feed (sample tweet: “I'm not on Facebook” is the new “I don't even own a TV”).
-
-
Exquisite narration!
- De Johanna en 11-13-15
De: Rainn Wilson
-
The Jolliest Bunch
- Unhinged Holiday Stories
- De: Danny Pellegrino
- Narrado por: Danny Pellegrino
- Duración: 6 h y 30 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
For many families, the holiday season is—in a word—unhinged. In no family is that more true than in Danny Pellegrino’s, beloved podcast host of Everything Iconic and bestselling author. Inappropriately improvised monologues at the children's Christmas pageant, presents that land someone in the emergency room, or just sitting on the absolute roller coaster that is a Hallmark movie marathon, the holidays are a strange and magical time in the Pellegrino household. And nobody knows this better than Danny.
-
-
So entertaining
- De LL Martin en 03-02-25
De: Danny Pellegrino
-
In Fifty Years We'll All Be Chicks...
- . . . And Other Complaints from an Angry Middle-Aged White Guy
- De: Adam Carolla
- Narrado por: Adam Carolla
- Duración: 6 h y 42 m
- Versión resumida
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
It's a sad and eerie harbinger of our times that the Oprah-watching, crystal-rubbing, Whole Foods-shopping moms and their whipped attorney husbands have taken the ability to reason away from the poor schlub who makes the Bloody Marys. What we used to settle with common sense or a fist, we now settle with hand sanitizer and lawyers. Adam Carolla has had enough of this insanity and he's here to help us get our collective balls back.
-
-
Save your money: racist, ignorant, loud babble
- De elpeposo en 11-24-10
De: Adam Carolla
-
Objects in the Mirror
- Thoughts on a Perfect Life from an Imperfect Person
- De: Stephen Kellogg
- Narrado por: Stephen Kellogg
- Duración: 5 h y 15 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Life - if you've ever thought you might be doing it wrong, you're not alone. Objects in the Mirror: Thoughts on a Perfect Life from an Imperfect Person is a collection of essays that explores what it means to be alive. Like Polaroids framing the years of a troubadour and family man afflicted with an excess of self-awareness, these are stories without any clear good guys or bad guys. Instead, in each of these vignettes you will find dysfunctional humans trying to do their best and bouncing off each other in the process.
-
-
My favourite storyteller
- De Jim Dwyer en 08-23-23
De: Stephen Kellogg
-
Home Sweet Road
- Finding Love, Making Music & Building a Life One City at a Time
- De: Johnnyswim
- Narrado por: Abner Ramirez, Amanda Sudano
- Duración: 5 h y 16 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Work and life partners Amanda Sudano Ramirez and Abner Ramirez are known for translating the memories and milestones of their journey, as well as the honest realities of marriage, into their spirited and soulful songs. With this audiobook, the duo shares never-before-told stories, recipes, poetry, and more from their life in a deeply engaging experience as they travel on tour around the country with their three young kids, capturing the family’s raw, intimate, and behind-the-scenes life on the road and embracing home no matter where they are.
-
-
Delightful, Delicious & Divine.
- De Chef Nekia en 06-25-21
De: Johnnyswim
-
Who Do I Think I Am?
- Stories of Chola Wishes and Caviar Dreams
- De: Anjelah Johnson-Reyes
- Narrado por: Anjelah Johnson-Reyes
- Duración: 8 h y 44 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
You may know Anjelah Johnson for her viral sketch "Nail Salon" (over 100 million views globally) or her beloved ghetto-fabulous MadTV character Bon Qui Qui, but it's her clean humor and hilarious storytelling that make her one of the most successful stand-up comedians and actresses today. With her razor-sharp wit, Anjelah recounts funny stories from her journey.
-
-
Funny, Deep and Does not Disappoint
- De Book Cook en 04-09-22
-
Save Yourself
- Memoir
- De: Cameron Esposito
- Narrado por: Cameron Esposito
- Duración: 6 h y 37 m
- Versión completa
-
General
-
Narración:
-
Historia
Save Yourself is full of funny and insightful recollections about everything from coming out (at a Catholic college where sexual orientation wasn't in the nondiscrimination policy) to how joining the circus can help you become a better comic (so much nudity) to accepting yourself for who you are-even if you're, say, a bowl cut-sporting, bespectacled, gender-nonconforming child with an eye patch (which Cameron was).
-
-
You need this book.
- De Robin en 07-07-20
De: Cameron Esposito