Far From the Tree

Parents, Children and the Search for Identity

De: Andrew Solomon

Narrado por: Andrew Solomon

* Selected as One of the Best Books of the 21st Century by The New York Times *

* WINNER of the National Book Critics Circle Award * Books for a Better Life Award * The New York Times Book Review’s 10 Best Books of the Year *

This masterpiece by the National Book Award–winning author of The Noonday Demon features stories of parents who not only learn to deal with their exceptional children, but also find profound meaning in doing so—“a brave, beautiful book that will expand your humanity” (People).

Solomon’s startling proposition in Far from the Tree is that being exceptional is at the core of the human condition—that difference is what unites us. He writes about families coping with deafness, dwarfism, Down syndrome, autism, schizophrenia, or multiple severe disabilities; with children who are prodigies, who are conceived in rape, who become criminals, who are transgender. While each of these characteristics is potentially isolating, the experience of difference within families is universal, and Solomon documents triumphs of love over prejudice in every chapter.

All parenting turns on a crucial question: to what extent should parents accept their children for who they are, and to what extent they should help them become their best selves. Drawing on ten years of research and interviews with more than three hundred families, Solomon mines the eloquence of ordinary people facing extreme challenges.

Elegantly reported by a spectacularly original and compassionate thinker, Far from the Tree explores how people who love each other must struggle to accept each other—a theme in every family’s life.

Parenting a Different Child/Astounding Book

The morning of December 14, 2012, I had a long drive and intermittent NPR stations, so I continued to listen to "Far From the Tree". The printed book is 702 pages long, and it's about 40 Audible hours. I was on Chapter X, Crime.

The book is beautifully narrated, and author/narrator Andrew Solomon's pronounciation of difficult terms is flawless. Even so, it's a difficult listen.

I have often wished that Audible had a true Table of Contents, and never more than with this book. The chapters are (with thanks to Amazon print) I. Son; II.Deaf III. Dwarfs IV. Downs Syndrome V. Autism VI. Schizophrenia VII. Disabilities VIII. Prodigies IX. Rape X. Crime XI. Transgender XII. Father.

Each section could, on its own, be a separate book - with the exception of I. Son and XII. Father - combine those two, and those would make a book.

Dwight Garner and Julie Meyer, writing separate reviews for the New York Times in November, love the book unreservedly. After listening to "Columbine", I was thinking of using a credit for this new book. I purchased "Far From the Tree" right after reading Meyer's rhapsodic review.

I am the mother of two teenagers who would not be in any of Solomon's chapters, but each and every section made me ache with my love for them. The challenges of normal teenagers, with raging hormones, lightning fast mood changes, and their sudden bursts of astounding clarity pale in comparison to what Solomon's families face. I am a better parent to them knowing that they are 'normal'.

I'm not a physician, sociologist or therapist - I'm just a Mom. I gained real confidence in trying my best to be a good Mom from this book. It was the best 'parenting' book I've read since "What to Expect When You're Expecting" by Heidi Muroff and Sharon Mazel. The books are entirely different, but reading them has the same effect. I am more (not less) confident about my mothering because of these books.

Which brings me back to December 14, 2012, the day of the Newtown/Sandy Hook mass murder. I have been wondering since then whether Sue Klebold, if given the choice, would have rather have been in Nancy Lanza's position - killed before she knew what her son did. I suspect not, and I hope Solomon can answer the queston for us.


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Worldview Shift

What made the experience of listening to Far from the Tree the most enjoyable?

Recieving a new, different perspective on human diversity.

What didn’t you like about Andrew Solomon’s performance?

At first I actually thought is was a robot reader. He is flat, choppy, and sounds like a synthetic voice. I've heard him give interviews and he was vibrant and engaged; however, not so in the reading. I acatually considered not listening, but the content is worth putting up with the performance.

Hire a professional performer so the reading is as good as the content.

What’s an idea from the book that you will remember?

Growth occurs through connecting with all that is possible within any human.

Any additional comments?

A book that will change lives.

A Masterpiece!

“Far from the Tree” is so much more than promised by the title. It consists of twelve distinct, fascinating and perspective-changing chapters that weave into a cohesive story of love and resilience. The author performs flawlessly, not so much because he is a professional narrator, but because this story is told from his heart.

Before listening to this book I questioned whether or not I would be able to sustain interest for 40 hours, but as soon as it started I was hooked. Hours flew by like minutes and I devoured this book until the very end.

Transforming the conventional mindset

This book helps me see the individuals I encounter more humanely, inclusively and tenderly. It is very liberating for the soul. Thank you Andrew.

40 Hours Well Spent

What did you love best about Far from the Tree?

Andrew Solomon shows keen insight and never-failing compassion with every interview for this book. He is especially good with parents. Parenting is soul-shaking work-- how wonderful to hear of the experiences of others doing this work in honest, unflinching, and loving writing.