CR: All right, we'll call you Gabby. We're all friends here. [Laughter]
GB: I think we're friends already, so call me Gabby, okay. [Laughter]
CR: Excellent. I love it. I wanted to start off with: What exactly is a super attractor? And then, how it fits in with the previous works I mentioned just a minute ago?
GB: I believe that when we take ownership of our thoughts and energy and emotions, we begin to redirect what it is that we attract into our life. I know that we're always attracting. We're always attracting whatever it is that we want. We also are attracting what we don't want. So, being a Super Attractor is getting into alignment with feeling good so that we are proactively attracting what we want into our life.
CR: I love it.
GB: Yes. You're also asking how it relates to my other books.
[Super Attractor] is the first time I've really pushed the metaphysical envelope much further than I have before.
CR: Yeah, is it a natural progression? Is this a new sort of perspective that you're introducing to the topics you've talked about previously in your works?
GB: I have six other titles, and they all come under the same umbrella of choosing to see through the lens of spiritual sight. Choosing to see through the lens of love. So, whether it was my first book, Add More -Ing to Your Life, which was really designed to help a new seeker join the spiritual movement, or my latest book that came out right before this one, Judgment Detox, all of these books have the guidelines of helping a reader or listener develop a spiritual relationship of their own understanding and begin to use it in their lives so that they can experience more of what they want. But each book has its own agenda, I guess. Each book has its own theme or method and different practices and tools.
GB: If there are any Universe Has Your Back listeners out there, which I know there are a lot of Audible Universe Has Your Back listeners, so hey. Those listeners have a great opportunity right now with Super Attractor. It doesn't matter at all where you start, but if you listened to the Universe Has Your Back, this is a great next step because it's taking those methods and really giving you an opportunity to use them even more. And that's actually good for any of my books. If you've read or listened to any one of my books, this is a fantastic next step.
CR: And this is sort of my being a fair weather practicer of manifesting and you know, the rule of attraction. How does this differ from other works--The Secret comes to mind--we may have heard of around the power of attraction?
GB: This book is about getting into alignment. It's not necessarily about getting what you want. That would will be the effect of the work that you do. That will be the bonus. But this book is about feeling good. This book is about getting your mindset into a place where you're not necessarily focused on why I don't have something yet, but you're focused on why you're feeling so good right now. And, leaning towards what feels good for you and going for more of it. So, while the promise of the book is methods for manifesting a life beyond your wildest dreams--that's the subtitle and the promise-- it's also deeper. Underneath that is the way we get there, the way that we can manifest our wildest dreams with life beyond our wildest dreams.
It's first and foremost by making feeling good our priority. We have so many different reasons to not feel good, and what we do, ultimately, is focus, focus, focus on all the things that aren't working and perpetuate more of it. I do this in my own life. I'm my greatest student, Courtney.
GB: I have to continuously come back to these practices. In fact, while I've been [recording] my audiobook this week, I am so pumped because it's making me feel the methods in my body again. Making me remember that I have to return to these tools, over and over and over again. And it's reminding me of what I already know and giving me a greater jumpstart.
It's interesting that you ask me about The Secret because that book was based on Esther Hicks's work, and she channels Abraham, which is an energy field [and way of] really teaching the law of attraction. And Esther Hicks is a huge influence on Super Attractor--Abraham and Esther. I rely on those principles that Abraham teaches in my own life, and I have infused them deeply into Super Attractor. There is actually a similarity between this book and The Secret in that sense.
CR: Thank you for saying that. That's really interesting to me, and I'm going to dig deeper into that when we're done. Now, I wasn't going to go there, but I was thinking, where I think of the power of attraction or the law of attraction as a place to get what you want, I really appreciate the distinction you make about being there now, but being happy now and then. The goal is being happy now, which takes my head to a place of self-care, which is obviously kind of an overused buzz phrase. But would you say self-care plays into this at all, because everybody's talking about self-care?
GB: Well, first let's just address the fact: we think that when we get something, that's when we'll feel good. It's quite the opposite. When we feel good, that's when what we want comes into our lives. So, most importantly, what we really, really, really want is just to feel good. So, we have to learn how to practice these principles of feeling good, regardless of what's manifested yet. Does that make sense to you?
CR: Yeah, it does.
GB: Cool. Self-care is such a huge priority for me in my own life, and I incorporate my feelings about self-care in my spiritual practice. When I sit down to do emotional rhythm technique-- which I do every single day just to clear out my negative belief systems and rage and anger, so that I can start my day with grace and bring only positive energy to my son and just show up for life --I also have this desire to use these spiritual principles, meditation, ESP, things like this, to care for myself. So, when I think of self-care, I don't necessarily think about taking a bath or putting on makeup, although those are definitely things I use as tools for self-care. What I think about most is my spiritual practice.
CR: Here's a question I had [about] one of the phrases that you use early on Super Attractor. You describe hard times as "spiritual assignments" for growth and healing, and you just mentioned that you, someone we view as so evolved and spiritual and good, as having rage and anger. So, can you talk about how the hard times or the negativity are spiritual assignments for growth and healing?
GB: If you've ever listened to any of my books or come to any of my talks, you know that I'm extremely authentic about my own experiences; if I wasn't, I wouldn't be able to do the work I do because I would just feel like a fraud, to be very honest with you.
And so, I am very, very open about the things I go through, because the things I go through have given me the opportunity to deepen my faith in the work that I teach. When I talk about a principle that I'm teaching on that stage, it's typically something that I've just applied in my own life, right? So, I think that it comes down to really accepting that the difficult things in our lives are great, great, great opportunities and spiritual assignments to go deeper on our own spiritual paths. I'm deeply grateful for all of the challenges that I've been presented with, although I'm very, very ready to have a lot of free flow... ultimately showing up with those challenges with a lot of grace. So, the benefit of showing up for life with these principles is that they start to show up less.
CR: This is something I'm curious about. You talk about grace--a practice of grace. How do you practice grace? How do you make that something on your to-do list? Like, is it meditation? Is it gratitude journaling? Like, what are, how do you just, it's, you say it as if it's, It sounds so easy for you, but I don't know how to make grace in my life, just poof, out of...
GB: Yeah. So, it's interesting. It's not like a poof. It's not a pill. It's not something you can just pick up. It's something you have to cultivate. Living with grace means that you have devotional practices daily that help you tune into inner wisdom, help you relax your nervous system, lower your cortisol level, and release... Oh, we talk about rage, right? We can address that. Release the rage, the anger, the anxiety, the frustration, and be real about your feelings. Because feeling good isn't about just, you know, turn on a switch and I feel good. Some of it has to be processing what's up and clearing it. So, I think of my morning devotional practice. I do emotional freedom techniques every single morning, which is a form of releasing negative belief systems and also really energetic disturbances that are behind your problems.
Then I take a deep meditation, and I practice appreciation. If I can just do those three things every single morning--even if the meditation's a few minutes and the ESP's longer, or the ESP is shorter and the meditation's longer, whatever it is that I can get to --as long as I practice these basic three things in the morning, I can live my day with grace. When I skip something, when I rush it a bit, when I jump into the problem, my day is not graceful. Okay, Courtney. It is not graceful.
GB: I mean, it's like anything. If you go to the gym regularly, you love going to the gym. So, you have to create that momentum behind your practice.
CR: So, again... I've heard a million times on a million things, there's no shortcuts. You can't just kind of [go]: I'm feeling graceful today, so I'll just walk out the door. [Laughter]
GB: You know, I think that's the cool thing about Super Attractor actually. It's not that it's a shortcut by any measure, but... it's simple. It's not saying oh, you have to go and do this deep thing... My book Judgment Detox was a lot of heavy lifting. You really had to get into it, and it was really for the devoted student... For anyone that read or listened to that book out there, congratulations. That was a lot of work. This book is lighter in a sense, and it's not going to feel like heavy lifting until you listen to it. You'll have an experience of feeling like, I can do that right now. I can apply that right now. I don't have to feel bogged down by the idea of starting something. So, I don't really want to make it sound like it's a ton of work, but it's a commitment.
GB: A commitment to show up to.
CR: We've kind of danced around this a little bit. You use phrases like angels and higher angels, and, obviously, the universe is in the title of one of your works. Those terms can be like a little like, "Ooh, oh, what, uh?", for literal-minded people who are like, "I just want my life to be better." Do you feel like you have to really be all-in on the angels and universe thing in order to reallyhave your work resonate?
GB: This book is the first time that I've talked about angels directly. It's the first time I've really pushed the metaphysical envelope much further than I have before. So, we will see, Courtney, how it is received. But my feeling is that there's going to be a really, really positive response because I think that people are much more spiritually awakened now than they were ten, eight years ago when I was writing my earlier books.
I only write what I feel calls and clear to write. Almost intuitively told to write. So, I I have a really strong sense that, even if it's something new for someone, they're going to embrace it. And the other thing I also do throughout the book: I address that if it's not for you, you choose what's for you. You choose what's for you.
CR: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
GB: This is about people creating their own spiritual connection.
CR: I do agree that spirituality has definitely been sort of buzzing around the ether a lot more than it used to and people are using these terms more. For this book/audiobook, in particular, if you were to file it in our library or in our catalog, would you file it under Spirituality or Self Development or a category we haven't even thought of yet?
GB: Yeah, both. Probably Personal Development and Spirituality. If I can have both.
CR: I think you can. We'll make sure that the people who are in charge of those things check both of those boxes.
CR: Speaking of audiobooks, I listened to some of your earlier tapes--I don't know if you know that. But I've also listened to your other books, and you have a highly listenable voice, which isn't true of every author. So, congratulations.
GB: Thanks. [Laughter]
CR: [Laughter] Tell me, is reading your own work for listeners super important to you? And were you trained in elocution and speaking, or is it something that comes naturally to you?
GB: It's a neat question. Well, I've come a long way with reading the books, but in general, I've been this skilled for 14 years, a little over 14 years, so I have become very comfortable speaking publicly and just speaking on air, or whatever it may be, so it gets easier and easier as time goes on. But let me tell you... The first book of mine that I read was Spirit Junky, and within the first five minutes, I can see the sound in here like in the bathroom, like oh, no. [Laughter]
GB: This is going to be a long few days. It was really, really, really hard. This is my seventh book. I never read my first book, and I'm going to be reading it--we're going to be creating it together.
CR: Oh, great.
GB: So, we're going backwards too.
CR: Great, great.
GB: Yeah, it's very cool. Add More -ing to Your Life will be read to Audible at last. So, the cool thing about this time around--I guess, it continues to get easier and easier--is that I'm wanting to revisit the work. I'm wanting to revisit the books, especially because it's something that I talk about a lot right now. I'm going to be gearing up to really sharing it with the world in a bigger way, so I want to get intimate with it. So, I use it as an opportunity. I'm like, "Oh, that's like a job to do for the next three days." It's an opportunity for me to go back deeper into the content and really remind myself of it, which is cool. So, I'm teaching myself while I'm reading the book.
GB: When I speak publicly, I use a handheld microphone which baffles people at times, because they're like, "Why do you use a handheld?" Why don't you use a Madonna Mic, right? Especially when there's a good headset. But I like to be able to control the sound, and I like to be able to use my voice in a way that I don't think I can do if there's just a little microphone in front of me. It's a similar experience when I'm reading the audiobook, in that I can really speak in different ways. I can pull back; I can go closer. I can hear myself as well, which is quite nice.
CR: I love this.
GB: I really love reading.
CR: I was just going to say I'm sorry to cut you off, but you're kind of an audio geek. Like, the engineer on the other side is kind of like, cool. I think he, she just said Madonna Mic. [Laughter]
GB: Yeah. I've had a really beautiful journey of being able to have the privilege of speaking publicly and having my voice heard. I think that's a very powerful metaphor forlife, right? Being heard in this way. Oh my God, a huge part of my core desire in life was always to be heard, and so to have this privilege... And that's actually an issue that I definitely have worked through, and now that voice can be heard with freedom. Does that make sense to you?
GB: When we allow ourselves to really let our messages be seen and be heard, and we all can do that in our own unique ways.
CR: Speaking of speaking [Laughter] and audio, before we got started, you did mention that you love to listen and you love audiobooks. Can you share with people , after they're done with all of Gabrielle Bernstein's works, what does she listen to and what can they go to next? What would you recommend?
GB: I love audiobooks. [Laughter] I live most of the time in the country, so I'm constantly driving. I also can't talk on my phone when I'm driving because I live where it's a rural area, so there's no cell service anywhere. And that's probably a good thing because I spend a lot of time listening to audiobooks. So, if you look at my Audible... You guys, if you haven't done this yet, you should do a column in the blog about, like, look at someone's Audible.
CR: Oh yeah. Love it.
GB: Oh my God...take an author and look at their account. That would be really funny. You should do that.
CR: Noted. Yes, I agree. [Laughter]
GB: Yeah. So, my Audible account is really quite funny. It's just really all spiritual books. It's Wayne Dyer, it's Brené Brown, it's Abraham-Hicks, it's Marianne Williamson, it's Eckhart Tolle. It's just, I guess, for me. And then there are some nerdy books. But mostly, personal growth and spiritual development books, which I guess isn't that surprising if you want.
CR: No, but there are probably some names in there, people haven't heard before, but now will go peruse because you've mentioned them. So, thank you.
GB: Maybe, yeah.
CR: Since we're on names, I couldn't help but be excited to talk to you about some of the big names you've attracted into your orbit over the years--and I'm particularly thinking of the one person I'd sell my firstborn for the chance to meet. Sorry B. I'm talking about Oprah. I have to ask: Is she as powerful of a presence in real life as she is in her work, and what did you take away from your time with her?
GB: Yes. She absolutely is, and the only way that she could have the profound impact that she's had on the world is if that was who she genuinely is. Right?
GB: Because we're living in a time right now where nothing is hidden. So, I don't think someone's on-camera presence can be different than who they are if they're going to have that hit of success. So, yeah, she's a wonderful strong presence and a welcoming person and exactly what you'd hope for when you met her. [Laughter]
CR: I'm wondering what it was like. Were you nervous when you met her, or were you all meditated up and great? I'm thinking of Brené Brown, who you mentioned. She tells a story...
GB: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
CR: ... about meeting Oprah for the first time, or unexpectedly meeting her, and just freaking out. Like, "Oh my God, it's Oprah!"
GB: It's funny. I've had several encounters with Oprah because I've worked with her in different ways. But the first time I met Oprah, and I haven't talked about this, I was on her show, SuperSoul Sunday. I thought I was going to like come out, give her a hug. And hey, the second I walked into the studio, the cameras were on and it was a go time... it went right into the questions. There was no moment. There was no beat. It was extremely surprising, but I think probably good because I wasn't... freaking out.
But in the book, I write about how I got very censored through channeling the energy of one of my teachers, my late mentor and teacher and friend, Dr. Wayne Dyer. And I talk about [what happened] before I spoke at Oprah's SuperSoul Session, which is sort of like Oprah's version of a TED talk, right?
GB: I've been speaking at that time for over a decade, and I never get nervous about my talks. But that day, I was terrified because Oprah stayed, and I realized I was making her very special. I was seeing her as separate. I talk about this all in the book. And I didn't want to be doing that because I wanted to show up with grace. I wanted to show up with ease, right?
GB: So, I did my meditation and I really centered myself and I aligned with my Super Attractor power. Then, just as the universe would have it, I'm pulling up to the venue, and there's an SUV in front of my car. I get out of my car, and the woman getting out of the other car is Oprah.
GB: I was just so grateful in that moment that I had tuned in and aligned with that Super Attractor power because I could hug her and say, "I'm so psyched to be here. Thank you so much," and not be a like a complete nerd.
GB: And not totally geek out. But more importantly, that I could show up for that whole day with a sense of service and not a sense of ego. So, I write about that method of really tuning in to God and beyond us, and it helped me that day.
CR: Great. It's something I struggle with, and I absolutely know that meditation works and all of these practices work... which sort of brings me to a question I meant to ask earlier: How do you do it? I've started meditating and stopped probably a hundred times. What is your advice for building up a practice of meditation and what you call grace building? How do you start that kind of practice?
GB: I believe that it has to become part of your day like brushing your teeth. You wouldn't start your day without brushing your teeth, 99.9% of the time. I would hope never, but.
GB: [Laughter] So, start a devotional practice of any kind. It could be journaling about appreciation, which I write about in the book. It could be breath work; it could be emotional freedom technique. It could be just listening to 10 minutes of an audiobook that really tunes you in. But, giving yourself that moment of stillness. It's interesting; I used to get a lot of moms saying, "I can't do it, my kids, there's a lot in the morning." And now, as a new mom--I have an eight-month old son, named Oliver. This book is dedicated to him.
GB: He's actually a huge theme throughout the book--just stories about Oliver shot towards the end of the book a lot.
GB: And what I said to those moms always was like, "Get up earlier." That was before I was a mom. I'm so happy that I'm not like a total fraud because that's what I do. I get up earlier. I get up at 5:00. I do my practice at 5:00 AM. Or I'll get the baby up and my husband will get the baby a bottle, and I'll go upstairs and excuse myself. You find those pockets of time where you can find them. If you don't have the privilege of having a husband home early or having a partner that can help with the bottle in the morning, get up earlier. That's what I would recommend. It's a commitment, and it will change your life. So, why wouldn't you want to do it?
CR: Oh, it's absolutely true about getting up earlier. It's hard, but once you do it... You'll be like, 5:00 AM seems so early, and then it's just a habit, like you said. So, it's good advice.
GB: Well, especially, when you were a child, 5:00 AM isn't even that early.
CR: Exactly. Before I had children, that would have felt like insane. But now, it's like, well, I get up at 6:00, so how different is 5:00? [Laughter]
GB: You know, it's funny. I have such a great appreciation for [sleep.] I had some sleep issues when I was postpartum; I was diagnosed with postpartum anxiety and I had insomnia. So, today if I get five hours straight, I'm like, jackpot. Great night. You know?
GB: Thankfully, now, I'm sticking close to eight hours a night again because I go to bed early. And then I wake up early, and that's the way it is. But sleep is a spiritual practice. We have to make that a priority. If you want to get up earlier and have your morning practice, then go to bed earlier.
CR: Yep. It's so simple on paper. I think it's actually hard at first, and then you figure out your rhythm. So, I appreciate that. So, coming back to Super Attractor as we kind of wrap up... Who is this for? I always ask authors this. I know you mentioned you dedicated it to Oliver. Who is the audience until Oliver is old enough to listen to it? What do you hope they get from it?
GB: Okay. So, the book is for spiritual seekers and anyone on a spiritual path. And I say that specifically because if you're totally not interested in spirituality, then you may have benefit from this book at some point in your life, but only when you're willing... because it's like anything, you can only get out of it what you're willing to put into it. So, you would want to have some kind of desire to see a world beyond your current circumstances. And you would want to feel good. And you would want to start to see things differently. So, you don't have to be this devoted spiritual student by any means. You could just be interested.
CR: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
GB: But that interest is enough to open the door for you. And, what's the promise? Is that what you were asking?
CR: Yeah. What do you think they'll be, what's the sort of result of having listened to Super Attractor?
GB: You won't feel like you're flailing around, searching for those moments of grace any more. You'll feel clear direction and a path towards aligning your energy daily with a positive feeling, so that life will begin to flow more. You'll attract more of what you want, and you'll ultimately be new. You'll be new.
CR: That's beautiful. I like that. I think that's a great ending. So, unless there's anything that you have to say to us, I'll just say thank you. I really appreciate you giving us your time.
GB: Thank you so much. I'm so happy that my words can come to the Audible world.