Why Him? Why Her?

Finding Real Love by Understanding Your Personality Type

By: Helen Fisher

Narrated by: Helen Fisher

Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins

Publisher's summary

The national best-selling book Why Him? Why Her? shows how a better understanding of who you are will help you find and keep the love you want

Why do you fall in love with one person rather than another?

In this fascinating and informative book, Helen Fisher, one of the world's leading experts on romantic love, unlocks the hidden code of desire and attachment. Each of us, it turns out, primarily expresses one of four broad personality types - Explorer, Builder, Director, or Negotiator - and each of these types is governed by different chemical systems in the brain. Driven by this biology, we are attracted to partners who both mirror and complement our own personality type. Until now the search for love has been blind, but Fisher pulls back the curtain and reveals how we unconsciously go about finding the right match.

Drawing on her unique study of 40,000 men and women, she explores each personality type in detail and shows you how to identify your own type. Then she explains why some types match up well, whereas others are problematic. (Note to Explorers: be prepared for a wild ride when you hitch your star to a fellow Explorer!) Ultimately, Fisher's investigation into the complex nature of romance and attachment leads to astonishing new insights into the essence of dating, love, and marriage.

Based on entirely new research - including a detailed questionnaire completed by five million people in 33 countries - Why Him? Why Her? will change your understanding of why you love him (or her) and help you use nature's chemistry to find and keep your life partner.

Download the accompanying reference guide.

©2009 Helen Fisher (P)2009 Macmillan Audio

I get it: Explorer, Builder, Director, Negotiator

Is there anything you would change about this book?

This was interesting, but at times, I thought Fisher beat the four personality archetypes to death.

Who was your favorite character and why?

Director/Negotiator ;-)

Who would you have cast as narrator instead of Helen Fisher?

Anyone. Fisher is very smart, but she has a tendency to slur her words, particular Rs and Ss. Also, her voice sounds like she's on the brink of or recovering from Laryngitis.

Was Why Him? Why Her? worth the listening time?

Yes. It was interesting to learn about the biological basis for personality types. I did not know that before this book. And I could see how each personality has a complementary type that we gravitate toward.

Any additional comments?

I don't think Fisher is "wrong" per se about keys to a committed, attached relationship, but given her own admission about how many she's had, sometimes her credibility is strained.

Learned alot about me and my mate.

Like other reviews, this is not only for relationships but for life. You will understand why people are the way they are. I am going to get the book to be able to referance back to a lot of stuff.

Very interesting

I loved listening to it. I learned a lot about the different personality types. When I meet people I take time to figure out what their main type is. I am getting to be pretty good at it.

Why Him Why

I found this book to be very useful. Thanks for providing the tests as a downloadable attachment. It would be nice if you made it more visible for people to see maybe under the Title ...several people have mentioned not being able to have them in written form as a negative to the book.

I love it.

I learned a lot about love, personalities, myself and others.
I loved everything she said is backed in science, but written in a way everyone understand.

Fun, but not enlightening or life changing.

Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?

I wouldn't recommend this title because it reads like little more than an extended Cosmo survey. Fisher is the founder of the personality profiling used by Chemistry, dividing people into four groups: builders, explorers, negotiators, and director. After you take the pdf attachment of the survey, you listen to detailed explanations of each type, with a famous historical figure who fits in that group. It's fun, but it really doesn't say too much about who your match or mate might be, since each type is capable of creating a relationship with each other type, though some matches are better than others.

way more fascinating than expected

I'm just expected this book to be more of a conservative peace but was actually much more until thing into the neurochemical side of love and focused on how different people love different ways and their neural chemical personalities on how they love.

Interesting

Motivational for deep inner searching and uncovering personally traits that spark growth, development and self-love, to expand resources to find the ideal woman.

Very practical

It was truly insightful and very practical ❤️
Who would have thought that my relationships would be described in a book. I mean, everything was so true about who I am attracted to and who is attracted to me.
Thank you!

Commercial for chemistry

What would have made Why Him? Why Her? better?

More actual research, less vague pseudo science info.

Any additional comments?

Not worth a listen. Summary of 4 times of personalities loosely based on some research that people of this type have more of this chemical in their brain.

the 4 types make up you. But the types have all over lapping and counter active traits assigned to them because there is no real research. So the author pulls from some sources that suggest something hinting at brain chemistry effecting how well you get along with other people with types of brain chemistry... Nice idea but she sums it up in 4 chemicals which is insulting, and very vague.

The book is more about how the author selling books and call it research based. Very disappointing. I wish i didn't purchase this or other reviews would have the common sense to rate this low.