An examination of childhood trauma and its surreptitious, debilitating effects by one of the world's leading psychoanalysts.
Never before has world-renowned psychoanalyst Alice Miller examined so persuasively the long-range consequences of childhood abuse on the body. Using the experiences of her patients along with the biographical stories of literary giants such as Virginia Woolf, Franz Kafka, and Marcel Proust, Miller shows how a child's humiliation, impotence, and bottled rage will manifest itself as adult illness - be it cancer, stroke, or other debilitating diseases. Never one to shy away from controversy, Miller urges society as a whole to jettison its belief in the Fourth Commandment and not to extend forgiveness to parents whose tyrannical childrearing methods have resulted in unhappy, and often ruined, adult lives. In this empowering work, writes Rutgers professor Philip Greven, "[listeners] will learn how to confront the overt and covert traumas of their own childhoods with the enlightened guidance of Alice Miller."
©2005 Alice Miller (P)2013 Audible, Inc.
It's great that 'honour thy mother and thy father' is questioned in this book. There are some parents who should not be honoured.
Don't know about moments but the whole book questions the way abused children are told to 'forgive' and 'honour' those who abused them when our bodies are telling us that our truth is so important.
A caring genuine sounding approach I suppose.
It gives you the freedom to accept how you feel, to be understanding of yourself instead of being understanding of the abuser.
The way Alice Miller uncompromisingly looks at abuse, neglect, and mistreatment of children from the child's point of view is truly an eye opener. She exposes the beliefs and emotions that adults experience as a result of harmful, even cruel parenting. She liberates the reader from having to retain a helpless dependency on their parents out of guilt, obligation, or an insistence on forgiving and honoring one's parents. She gives many examples of famous and ordinary people whose bodies never lied, although many remained unconscious of their own biography and suffered. Fascinating book, great storytelling, and such a beacon of hope for treating our children much much better.
I was recommended to read this book for the understanding by a professional. I started out thinking that it was way too dark.
However after I got into it I realized that the author was really on to something. She has a clear view of the effects of parenting and of course she does not blame as much as she explains. I was a bit concerned that she was heading into feminist nonsense, but then realized that was not doing that at all. I highly recommend this author's book(s)
"Valuable message, piece of a puzzle"
As a part of a series of books about how we are wired to operate, it makes good sense and explains in an emotional way, how we are connected as minds to our body, if only by the end results of our lives. This book only lacks two things, in my opinion: better connection to the mechanisms and reactions of our body to our experiences, and what exactly is the term "cruel parenting" with a fair understanding of how "the perpetrators" are doing their wrong and when exactly. It is a complementary book to others such as "stumbling onto happiness" and "welcome to your child's brain", in order to get the idea. I liked a lot the fictional diary in the book which explains in an experiential way what the writer wanted to say but was "missing the nail". Overall worth the money and time. A piece of the puzzle for further self development or even for a professional to include in their sphere of view.
"An incredible work"
Eye opening and groundbreaking stuff. Revealing and insightful it has really given me an understanding of why there is so much dysfunction in our society
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