Through the best-selling ScreamFree Parenting, Hal Runkel showed thousands of parents how keeping their cool can revolutionize their family life. In his groundbreaking new book, ScreamFree Marriage, Runkel now shows couples how learning to stay calm, in the face of common marital conflicts, is the key to creating and enjoying a deep, lifelong connection.
Every committed couple strives to hold on to the marriage they envisioned back when they first said "I do"--before the end of the honeymoon phase, before kids, mortgages, health crises, and all life's inescapable issues. But the truth is this: conflict is unavoidable--it's impossible for two people to see every single thing, face every issue, and experience every situation in exactly the same way. What results are couples "screaming" at each other--sometimes literally yelling out loud, sometimes shutting themselves down and shutting their partners out, and sometimes avoiding the issue altogether--none of which leads to the passionate, intimate connection we all crave.
In ScreamFree Marriage, Hal introduces some radical new concepts about marriage, teaching couples how to embrace this inevitable conflict as a profound vehicle for strengthening a marriage. Rather than just a source of pain and disagreement, these "Fires of Commitment," as Hal describes them, can actually be the exact experience needed to grow couples into new levels of maturity and intimacy. By simply learning the ScreamFree formula of Calming Down, Growing Up, and Getting Closer, you too can cross through these fires and end up with a closer and more passionate marriage than ever before. Using accessible anecdotes and the disarming humor that readers have come to love, Runkel disproves prevailing marital wisdom, puts couples on a path to "intimate independence" and reveals a whole new, fresh approach to marriage.
©2007 Hal Edward Runkel (P)2011 Random House
I really liked it, easy to read and to the point and quite easy to listen to. I haven't yelled at my husband or kids yet (been a whole three weeks and counting!).
This audio book gives you practical advice that is easily implemented and can be used within the frame of any relationship in your life. I've read a lot of self improvement/self help/relationship books and while many have some pretty great ideas not many of them give easy ways to apply these new and awesome ideas to your daily life in a way that brings about real changes. I've just started to utilize his teachings and have seen a tremendous shift in my ability to really communicate what I mean and to feel a better sense of connection with my loved ones.
From the perspective of an 'involuntary' single male, I found this to be an inspiring book. A lot of dating advice that I've come across in the past has often struck me as disingenous or, worse, vaguely manipulative; and while listening to this I realised why: It *is* deceitful and *downright* manipulative, and it was only desperation that had me entertaining it.
If you're looking for ideas of how to resolve a specific problem, you might be disappointed with this book, and I'd argue this is by design. This book is not a list of relationship tips, but rather an attempt to reframe relationship challenges in a way that is empowering. It's certainly made me see my own situation in a new light, and spend less time 'managing my image', which is code for 'lying about myself so people think about me the way I *think* I want them to think about me'! But I think that's the greatest lesson from this book, that in order to truly connect, you have to know what it is you really want...
I did listen to it while performing rote work in a plastics factory. I probably would have listened while doing yard work or computing.
Having gone through therapy I recognize a parallel theme so I have had that reinforced. It is important to "look through a different window" sometimes to see more clearly. This book has helped me to do so.
I do recommend it.
think before acting!
i liked that he made sure we were clear between chapters. hence, i knew well and where to make notes!
I have grown/changed in ways to be honest, was a little bit discouraged from chapter 1, but right after I was very pleased with the insights, stories and the presentation that explored alternative scenarios so one can understand himself, partner and the situation.
Loves the author, his voice, his advice. found it to be more practical and easy to apply than any other relationship books I've read in the past. couldn't stop listening.
I wish I would have been referred to this book when I was going through a divorce I would have stopped feeling guilty for leaving an abusive relationship because of everyone else's opinion and done it sooner.
I loved how he encouraged the listener to focus on ourself and take control of our actions. It's about first loving ourselves and being able to grow in God as we change through that. Super funny too!
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