• Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids

  • How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting
  • By: Laura Markham
  • Narrated by: Xe Sands
  • Length: 6 hrs and 58 mins
  • 4.6 out of 5 stars (1,934 ratings)

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Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids  By  cover art

Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids

By: Laura Markham
Narrated by: Xe Sands
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Publisher's summary

Based on the latest research on brain development and extensive clinical experience with parents, Dr. Laura Markham's approach is as simple as it is effective. Her message: Fostering emotional connection with your child creates real and lasting change. When you have that vital connection, you don't need to threaten, nag, plead, bribe - or even punish.

This remarkable guide will help parents better understand their own emotions - and get them in check - so they can parent with healthy limits, empathy, and clear communication to raise a self-disciplined child. Step-by-step examples give solutions and kid-tested phrasing for parents of toddlers right through the elementary years.

If you're tired of power struggles, tantrums, and searching for the right "consequence", look no further. You're about to discover the practical tools you need to transform your parenting in a positive, proven way.

©2012 Laura Markham, Ph.D. (P)2013 Tantor

Featured Article: The 10 Best Parenting Audiobooks


As many parents know all too well, there’s no official guide on how to raise your child. From all the ways you can show love and affection to the more difficult acts of helping them grow through discipline, each kid—and each family—is unique in what they need. A one-size-fits all approach doesn’t exist, which is why finding the advice and resources that best speak to you are so important. We’ve pooled together the top resources on parenting for all different styles and families, and parents looking for a wide breadth of advice.

What listeners say about Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids

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  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars

Not for parents of elementary aged kids

I was dissapointed that this book was geared towards married parents of toddlers & preschoolers with little practical advice for parents of elementary aged kids. I have always believed in peaceful, positive parenting but after a year that saw lots of changes in our family dynamic, I found myself feeling more stressed more often with my 8 and 9 year olds so I turned to this book for help. Unfortunately, although the book claims to be for kids through the elementary years, most of the book was focused only on toddlers & preschoolers. Also, the scenarios discussed almost always assumed there was another supportive parent at home to help and that one parent was at home with the child at all times. I can see this book being helpful to parents of little kids - especially those that are coupled and don't use childcare (otherwise you might feel shamed...) but it was not the book that I thought it would be.

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111 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
  • JC
  • 12-04-13

Hands Down, Best Parenting Book I've Ever Read

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

Absolutely. I've encouraged my wife to start giving it out to friends at baby showers. This book was one of those paradigm shifting "aha" books for me as a father.

Any additional comments?

I thought I was a pretty good parent before reading this book, but still had a few questions and knew there were area's I could improve in. My kids are 6, 4, 2, 0... I wish I could have found this book before I started parenting, it has completely changed my outlook on parenting and connecting with my kids.

I had heard about a "no discipline" approach and thought it absolutely absurd. I'm a fairly strict father and hold my children to extremely high standards. We have timeouts, consequences (that my wife and I make up). I'm converted this is not the way to parent your children and that the strategies presented by Dr. Laura Markham work. I've seen vast improvement in my children's behavior.

I was brought up in a strict home and was consequently taught to be a strict parent. I think most parents are that way. But there is a better and easier way to teach our children to become happy, healthy, and responsible adults. It's all about connection, and I didn't realize the how much I was hurting the connection I had with my kids.

READ THIS BOOK!

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66 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

I'm a father who works construction

I don't have a lot of time to read and I never would have thought this sissy Lala kind of stuff would be so important improving my life and my sons life

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43 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

The most practical and helpful parenting book.

This is simply the most practical and helpful parenting book I've listened to so far. P.E.T and How to Talk So Kids Will Listen... are great, but this one is now my favourite by far.

It had really and truly helped me understand and connect better with my kids and to reduce the level of discord I was unintentionally generating. I am currently listening to it a second time.

The narration is perfect, and I don't use that term lightly.

I HIGHLY recommend this audio book.

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29 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

So helpful!

Was abused as a child and this book helped me to break the cycle, need I say more :p

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27 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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Game Changing Approach to Parenting

This book completely changed the way I see and interact with my kids. I was getting nowhere with discipline and rewards. Not only do I now understand why this doesn't work, I have the incentive to try an empathic approach. I have seen a huge difference in my ability to de-escalate tantrums, foster cooperation, and create the foundation for happy/secure kid already...just in the first week of implementing these techniques. Plus I feel so much better about myself as a competent parent when I really put everything aside to fully connect/engage with my kids. I know it works because my kids are visibly flourishing, and it feels so much better in my gut to parent this way. It's what I would have been doing all along if I'd only known how!

Should be required reading. I think I'll start gifting this at baby showers from now on!

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22 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Some things made sense, others didn't

I felt like the book was very repetitive. Also, there was some advice that seemed it would definitely have a detrimental effect. For instance she recommends turning it into a game when a kid throws food on the floor. I'm pretty sure they're likely to repeat it if it's fun.

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14 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Similar To No Drama Discipline

Where does Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids is similar in content to No Drama Discipline, which I read right before reading Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids. While I enjoyed this book the author seems to have a strong belief that connection and empathy is the only way to discipline and in fact that things like time out have no role and should be taken out of the parenting toolbox completely. While I believe that empathy and connection is a great first step and I've seen first hand that further discipline is often not necessary I would not go so far as to say that there is never a role for time out.

What about Xe Sands’s performance did you like?

She has a chipper, happy voice that seems to lend excitement to the reading of this book and this topic.

What did you learn from Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids that you would use in your daily life?

From both this book and No Drama Discipline I have learned the value of connecting and empathizing as a first step in discipline/redirection. I've used it a lot with my great niece and great nephews and have found it works well. There is a lot of information in both books which deals with how the experiences (discipline and otherwise) that we give our kids impacts the way that their brains develop and the strengths that they develop. It's a really good book. I recommend it...though the strong push that connection and empathy is the only approach which would ever work and that a more firm boundary like time out would never be needed did bother me and does account for the four rather than five star review. It's still definitely worth reading.

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12 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Came to stop yelling, stayed for revolutionary changes

The title of this book and the high reviews pulled me in- finally, a way to help control yelling which I knew in my heart to be counterproductive. That issue gets tackled firmly and effectively early on in the book. But then Dr. Markham takes it up a notch and gives you the foundation and fundamental tools you need to be the best parent you've always wanted to be for your child. Listen with an open mind and open heart, it can change your life and most importantly, the lives of your children.

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10 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

An excellent book on parenting.

There are several books on this topic and I'm not sure if this is the best, but it's the best one I've found so far. I am a social worker and part of my job is helping parents with their discipline methods. This book explains the topic clearly and the narration is excellent. The message is to change your own behavior to teach your child to behave. I completely agree with the author that the parent's emotional intelligence is extremely important. If you want to predict what kind of adult your child will be you only need to look inside yourself. He/She will most likely have all of your strengths and weaknesses. If you are prone to adult temper tantrums, then your child will copy you. If you are in control of your emotions and remain calm, your child will begin to copy that as well. It won't happen overnight mainly because the parent is going to mess it up and won't be able to maintain calm. The child will increase their testing behavior when the old methods stop working, but if the parent can truly change then the child will follow.

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8 people found this helpful