View your sex life in a different light and learn how it can make you happier. Sex is the most intimately human experience there is. It is can also be the most confusing. Our desire to be together conflicts with our desire to avoid vulnerability and appear ‘normal’, leaving us detached, desensitised or embarrassed. Covering topics including adultery, lust, pornography and impotence, Alain de Botton argues that 21st century sex will always be a balancing act of trust versus risk, and of primal desire versus studied civility. By examining sex from a subjective - rather than scientific - perspective, he uncovers new ideas on how we can achieve that balance.
Pulling back the sheets on modern sexuality, How to Think About Sex offers important and surprising wisdom that proves that being good in bed is really all in your head.
©2012 The School of Life (P)2012 Macmillan Digital Audio
A great non-fiction read, with real insights for modern life, forcing us to challenge our belief systems and shine a light on some of the topics we might want to avoid, but need to address.
As with the other I have read books by this author, his logical structure and flow is second to none, without being over complicated. He uses everyday language to posit his points of view. I'd characterise it as: modern and useful philosophy for the (probably educated) masses.
As a society, we need to think about the viability and place of marriage and sex in our society.
The typical, dry and understated wit of de Botton, makes it easier to review and challenge some steadfast and institutionalised practices and views including marriage, monogamy, fetishes, and the thrill of the chase.
He challenges pure biological views of the way coupling has evolved. As always, he supports his arguments and observations drawing from a wide variety of sources including art, history, and religion through to scientific research and scholarly works, online chat rooms and pornhub.
He takes a compassionate and humorous view of the challenges that spouses face. Perhaps my favourite passage is:
"Fidelity deserves to be considered an achievement and constantly praised, ideally with some medals and the sound of a public gong, rather than discounted as an unremarkable norm, whose undermining by and affair should provoke spousal rage.
A loyal marriage ought at all times to retain within it an awareness of the immense forbearance and generosity that the two parties are mutually showing, in managing not to sleep around, and for that matter, in refraining from killing each other."
David Thorpe reads this with the tone and humour you would expect and hope from the author and the content.
It re-enforces for me the statement that "marriage is not for the faint-hearted". It provides some useful tools and insights as to how we as couples, and as a society, can move forward, being more compassionate, understanding and perhaps a little less judgemental of ourselves and those around us.
A useful read for any couple hoping to make it through life together.
"Alain knows us"
Again Alain identifies an all too well-known subject and with his eyes and mind and words makes us see it in a fresh new way. I guess the stress mark in the title should be placed under the words think and more. I mainly loved the book, though its final chapter did not feel so honest, but rather as something he had to say.
"psychobabble for me..."
narrative was great and a nice voice to listen to.
book was far too deep for me and I found myself drifting when listening to it.
wasn't for me.
"Excellent and thought-provoking"
Again using narrative to engage the reader, De Botton successfully throws our understandings of love, sex and marriage into oblivion and invites us to question our behaviour. A fabulous read!
"An interesting read"
This book began as a new way to think about sex and its place in our society. I found that stimulating. Nonetheless, there were parts where I found myself wanting to put my head through a wall (see the section on pornography) and felt swamped in Alain's tendency to be an old school traditionalist.
I secretly hoped the book would be a progressive manifesto for reconstructing modern relationships, but proved to be far tamer than that. Alain has some interesting contributions to the debate on modern relationships, but I felt that his work would've benefited from the inclusion of feminist discourse on love and sex. By leaving out the gender-specific issues in relationships, the book felt like a superficial glaze on what is really happening among young couples.
Not sure what I was expecting with this -- I like the School of Life series. But a well-written essay about sex that dealt with interesting issues but left no lasting impression.
"I hate the DRMstuff You add!"
Never with DRM on it
Not use DRM
Have not been able to hear it due to DRM
Please skip the DRM!!!
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