The Girl Who Disappeared Twice

Forensic Instincts, Book 1

By: Andrea Kane

Narrated by: Jim Colby

Length: 11 hrs and 14 mins

Publisher's summary

New York Times and USA Today best-selling author Andrea Kane brings fans a brand-new series with her romantic thriller The Girl Who Disappeared Twice.

Forensic Instincts—a team of independent maverick investigators comprised of a techie-genius, a former Navy SEAL/FBI agent, a psychic, and a retired FBI dog—must rescue a kidnapped five-year-old girl. But with so many people who could have benefited from the girl’s abduction, tracking down the culprit will push the team to the limit.

©2011 Rainbow Connection Enterprises (P)2011 Recorded Books, LLC

A mess of a story

Now, this is not the worst audible book I have ever listened to, but close. (That honor goes to Harlan Coben's first book). I know this because I listened until the very end, but couldn't wait for it to be over. The story is about a kidnapped girl and her (spoiler) return to her mom. I hated the book for a number of reasons, but the biggest issue I had was the reliance hardened scientists placed in Clair Voyant the unbelievably insightful and magical visionary who was able to see things that only the perpetrator could have seen. I only listened to the book until the end hoping against hope that this would prove to be the case. (spoiler) Alas, she wasn't: she actually could see the color of the room where the child was being held hostage. If only Sylvia Brown (a "real life" psychic) were so successful and could have seen that the kidnapped girls she saw on the other side, was, in fact, alive and miserable in a basement.

Other gems: twins are involved and not in a pleasing way. The FBI almost screws everything up, but the day is saved by the insights of a private contractor that only a rich judge could trust. Mafiosi do terrible things, but only to fill in pages and pages of distraction: how do you like your herring? Red. And the leaps of deduction the heroes made to discover the villain defy logic and apparently the author's skill. Some one stepped on the needle in the haystack and then pretended that all the arrows pointed there to anyone who cared to see them.

The book seems to be well-liked by many. This is my effort to direct your attention to other more worthy titles.

FINALLY THIS TERRIBLE BOOK IS OVER!!!

OK who didn't know 'who done it' within the first 30-45 minutes of listening to this book?!?!?! Even when a book is terrible I always try to finish to give a chance but pleasssssse.

The people who read this genre of book like a challenge read. Not only do we read these books we watch the genre in movies and tv. We want surprises, something new to pull us in, feel for the characters and best yet not have the book figured out every step of the way. And how about some smart characters too. The judge is well , lets say I wouldn't want to have her preside over anyone I knew. She has no common sense. She can't see the whole picture even when its been presented directly to her, over and over again. In fact, most of the characters are like that. They are presenting the facts and running through scenarios and the obvious is well whats the saying "if it was a snake it would bit them'. I found myself talking back to the book.

The dog was the best part of the book. I won't give spoiler alerts but suffice to say a five year old could have figured this out, even the fill in details. The clairvoyant was the next best character. I believe there are people with these gifts and they are overlooked as quacks (some are but not all) So to insert a believable clairvoyant and actually have at least half the other characters believing her and follow her leads is a good thing.

I like the idea of a private company like Forensic Instincts. There are many people out there that are not law enforcement, that aren't members of the alphabets, that are way more capable than the badged ones but they are looked down upon because they don't have badge or 'special agent' before their names. I know there is at least one other book in this series and I will give it a try just because I like the premise but I certainly hope the author has wised up to realize her readers are smarter than this and want a challenge. FI is a great storyline and would make a great long term series IF the author gives us readers more credit than in this first book.

And can I just say regarding tv reference genre , to put in the book a special agent from the FBI's BAU who's nickname is Hutch (remember I was listening and not reading so I think that's how it would be spelled) that sounds exactly like Hotch, agent Hotchner, who is a special agent in the FBI's BAU from Criminal Minds is well............ reallllllllly

OH and I hope its not the same narrator. He wasn't the worst but certainly far from a voice that could lend itself to the story telling.

This shouldn't be boring ...

But it is boring. Not fond of the style, not interested in the story, more than apathetic about the characters. Abandoned.

Book; poor Narrator; worse

I took a chance on this work of fiction because it was in the 3 for 2 sale. I now wish I'd read the reviews before I purchased this perfect example of an interesting idea, poorly executed and poorly performed. This is a mid level television writer doing a network drama. The narrator is more suited to TV commentary or thirty second commercials than to an eleven hour book.I forced myself to give this one two hours before I gave up so perhaps it got better. If it did then I apologize I just wasn't willing to give up any more of my time to find out.

Two tales of kidnapping

A judge's daughter is kidnapped - by a woman who looks like the judge & drives the same expensive silver car she does. The judge was a twin whose sister was kidnapped when they were children. The main character heads a company that offers more services than the police & the company is engaged to bring the little girl home. It's a twisty story but I tumbled fairly early on to a possible explanation for some of the seemingly impossible issues. The story kind of chugged along with the lady heading the company getting very little sleep but taking time out for sex... There's a psychic character she wants to hire for her company...
The private company solves the crime, but, while the earlier parts of the story are clear in my memory, the ending is so unmemorable that I frankly forget...

Can't remember why this sounded good...

This is my first Audible review and my first Andrea Kane book. I really wanted to stop listening from the second chapter - but I just kept thinking it might surprise me. It didn't. The story was far too easy to see through (if you watch CSI or Criminal Minds this story will feel like play-doh), the writing was simple, and the narrator was awful. Actually, I think that it was the narrator that made me keep listening because I was afraid I was letting him ruin the story for me. He had a rhythm he didn't want to break; I expect it was for breathing, but he really seemed like he was trying to read poetry instead of a story. He also had a deeply nasal quality that distracted me, not like a stuffy nose but more like a mouth breather. He didn't attempt to differentiate the characters with the tone of his voice and that made the story difficult to follow at times. In addition, his female and child voices were horrendous. I really hated every minute of his reading and I feel cruel for saying so, but his rhythm and delay probably added an hour to the reading. I was so tempted to put my iPod on double time! While I was certain I knew the outcome of the who-done-it I remained hopeful throughout, but if there is any suspense to be felt in this story the narrator quashed it with his reading. If the story-lines of Ms. Kane's books could be a little more complex in the future I could imagine enjoying a series made up of these characters though.

Someone spent too much time research FBI words

Would you try another book from Andrea Kane and/or Jim Colby?

No, the dialogue is horrible, the details are too faked and she is overly complimentary to the FBI who must have consulted. I called the story end after the abduction. I hate books where EVERYONE is the ABSOLUTE best in their field, perfect physical specimens and the totally "good' people vs. the totally "bad" people. The she threw in this obviously repressed sex scene that felt very awkward.

Would you be willing to try another one of Jim Colby’s performances?

He was fine, compared to the dialogue he had to work with.

You didn’t love this book... but did it have any redeeming qualities?

The story was semi interesting, which kept me listening, but the dialogue was so bad, it was unbelievable.

Horrible, not worth a credit or on sale!

What would have made The Girl Who Disappeared Twice better?

I don't normally rate books but I could not allow anyone to throw away their credits or money on this one. The writing is simply terrible with repetition and cliches throughout. The characters are incredibly weak and Ms. Kane's description of the surroundings even weaker. New characters are introduced poorly if at all. There are a number of mistakes throughout that a good editor (if not the author) should have picked up immediately.

If you are an avid reader of this genre you could figure out the plot in under 5 minutes it is so predictable and poorly written. No suspense, no puzzle, no feeling at all. There is no continuity, not a single well-written chapter, nothing that would appeal to a reader (or listener). This is one of the worst books I have read or listened to in decades, literally, and I probably read 3-4 books a week.

Has The Girl Who Disappeared Twice turned you off from other books in this genre?

No, but definitely from this author and narrator.

How did the narrator detract from the book?

The performance was horrible - the narrator appeared to have no interest in reading the book (can't blame him really given the content) and was monotonic throughout. Too add to the misery, he must have gotten a cold after the first few chapters and the narration became congested and his narration even worse. I don't think the narrator ultimately detracted from the book - it was very poorly written - but this is definitely not the narrator's genre. His tone never changed, his voices never changed for different characters (or very rarely and never consistently). He may be better suited to textbook reading. Personally I would not spend a credit or money on a book narrated by this individual again.

What character would you cut from The Girl Who Disappeared Twice?

Everyone but the dog.

Any additional comments?

Not worth your credits or money. The author needs to revisit her writing abilities, and the narrator his. I can only hope for the readers' sake that if Ms. Kane wrote sequels her writing has improved. I will not be reading or listening to one of her books in the future.

Don't waste your money

The reader messes up voices during conversation, making it difficult to follow sometimes. The story is poorly written, and drags on and on and on. could not force myself to finish it.

Warning: The title of this book is a lie

Would you try another book from Andrea Kane and/or Jim Colby?

I will not be listening to another book by Andrea Kane. Partly because I think gratuitous sex scenes are a waste of space—the interest in the book is a kidnapped child, not the hot and heavy between two of the people trying to find the child. These people are stressed from the hunt for a missing little girl and not sleeping more than a few hours a night, and they want to have sex all the time? Really? The problem with this particular book is that it is so [spoiler alert] obvious from the beginning that the vanished twin sister is the kidnapper, that a reader wants to scream at both the FBI and the crack team led by Casey that is so brilliant they can find and solve issues before the feds can. How could both groups of supposedly crack detectives be so thick?

What do you think your next listen will be?

Perhaps another Alan Bradley, narrated by Jayne Entwhistle, who actually does a child's petulant whine rather well.

How could the performance have been better?

The performance was adequate. Colby does an excellent job with male character voices, a good job with women's voices, and an execrable job on a female child's voice, but I believe it nearly impossible to handle a child's voice well.

If you could play editor, what scene or scenes would you have cut from The Girl Who Disappeared Twice?

Oh dear. OK, the sex scenes between Casey and the FBI guy were a waste of time and paper, or rather, air. I would rewrite character of the judge, who refers to the little girl as her baby until I wanted to smack her, or the author. The judge is irritating. She seems to have the brains of a high school dropout instead of a seasoned law professional. She doesn't trust the FBI? She marries a sleazeball, and stays married to him? She delivers the ransom money???

Any additional comments?

Please understand that I read memoirs, historical mysteries, mysteries and thrillers, and rarely ever read romance or steamy bodice rippers. Eww. So some of my comments are naturally affected by my personal preferences.