Love and Asperger's

Jim and Mary's Excellent Adventure

By: Mary A. Johnson PhD

Narrated by: Mary A. Johnson PhD

Length: 11 hrs and 7 mins

Publisher's summary

What do you do when the man who courted you turns out to be different after marriage?

When Jim began to behave strangely, Mary thought she had made a huge mistake. She had fallen in love and left all that was familiar in New Mexico, to marry and move to Oregon with this man she met online. One day, she had a surprising epiphany while doing laundry. How had she missed the obvious cause of his quirky behavior?

In Love and Asperger’s: Jim and Mary’s Excellent Adventure, a memoir by Dr. Mary A. Johnson, we experience the possible unraveling of the marriage ties. The future rests on Jim’s willingness to accept his diagnosis of Asperger’s. Come along on Jim and Mary’s adventures—some fun, some difficult, some comical, but all loving—as they eventually work together to engineer an excellent solution!

“When Jim and Mary got married during their golden years, neither one of them knew that Jim had Asperger’s syndrome. In this intimate memoir, Mary describes how they learned about and successfully embraced her late husband’s autism. In addition to providing a rare portrait of an elderly Aspie, this book is a love story that will inspire anyone who is interested in building close and nurturing relationships. Because the book is so well-crafted and engaging, even readers who are not involved in the autism community will find it rewarding to join Jim and Mary on their excellent adventure.” (Dean Falk, PhD, co-author of Geeks, Genes, and the Evolution of Asperger’s Syndrome, Hale G. Smith Professor of Anthropology, Distinguished Research Professor, Department of Anthropology, Florida State University)

“Doing the laundry is not an activity most of us would consider a setting for an epiphany that would change two lives from trudging onward together into an Excellent Adventure. But there it is! Mary had an insight that spotlighted the struggle she was having living with Jim. Sharing her perceptions with him, gifted Jim with understanding that freed him from years of hurt and confusion. Dr. Johnson’s memoir was written with the wish that her recognition will help others move from an arduous trek into their own Excellent Adventure.” (Marythelma Brainard Ransom, PhD, Psychologist, Recipient of a 2020 Gradiva
Award from the National Association for Advancement of Psychoanalysis)

“In this memoir, Mary has written an honest, beautiful, and often painful account of love in the “third third” of life. Her story blends the discovery of her new husband’s struggle with Asperger’s Syndrome and how her therapist background helped him. Ultimately, she has created a guidebook for understanding Asperger’s, with ingeniously interwoven resources regarding its effect on relationships. Combining humor, great tenderness, unexpected events, and scientific facts, this gripping tale will leave the reader informed and inspired.” (Joan Moss, author of Blessings for a Grieving Mother)

“When I started to read Mary’s book, I couldn’t put it down. I wanted to find out more about these two older people in love, and how their story continued.... Love and Asperger’s: Jim and Mary’s Excellent Adventure will long serve as a fun and deeply personal explanation of the challenges and delights of loving and living with an Aspie. Mary uses personal examples paired with specific researched details about Asperger’s to explain her husband’s differences. As a clinician, I would recommend this book to anyone living with an adult person with Asperger’s. It is also a love story of an older adult couple who met on the Internet and is of timely interest to many!” (Jackie Downie, M.S.W.)

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2021 Mary A. Johnson Ph.D. (P)2022 Mary A. Johnson Ph.D.

A must if you love someone with Asperger’s

I had to tell him I had a crush on him. He said, “I’m honored but I can’t demonstrate love very well. I have Asperger’s. “

Here I was, a 62 y.o. twice widowed gay man. After 10 years alone, I had given up having a parter into my final years. I did not think I could cope emotionally with a third death of a husband. But it was too late, I loved him. Now I had to learn about Asperger’s. Something I had heard of but no clue of what it meant.

This book was meant for me. I had read (and continue to read) anything about relationships with a person blessed with Asperger’s. Everything I read was oriented toward children and young adults.

The book has given me exactly what I needed. a rich view of a real relationship with two OLD people that love each other. I can’t thank Jim enough for asking Mary to write it. I can’t thank Mary enough for writing it.

My one critique is the use of the term Aspi. My partner does not identify with or use the term. I feel it labels someone and implies pathology. But that is just our take on the word.

Asperger’s is a wonderful trait and I am so lucky to be in love with someone that has many of the traits and disproves most of the sterotypes.

Thank you

My story is much like this. Met on the internet and he was amazing and swept me off my feet. After 2 years of courtship we married and everything changed. Like Your Jim in so many ways but different too. All aspires are not equal. Thank you for writing this book