Girl in Need of a Tourniquet

Memoir of a Borderline Personality

By: Merri Lisa Johnson

Narrated by: Erin Bennett

Length: 4 hrs and 53 mins

Publisher's summary

An honest and compelling memoir, Girl in Need of a Tourniquet is Merri Lisa Johnson’s account of her borderline personality disorder and how it has affected her life and relationships. Johnson describes the feeling of "bleeding out" unable to tell where she stopped and where her partner began. A self-confessed "psycho girlfriend," she was influenced by many emotional factors from her past. She recalls her path through a dysfunctional, destructive relationship, while recounting the experiences that brought her to her breaking point.

In recognizing her struggle with borderline personality disorder, Johnson is ultimately able to seek help, embarking on a soul-searching healing process. It's a path that is painful, difficult, and at times heart-wrenching, but ultimately makes her more able to love and coexist in healthy relationships.

Download the accompanying reference guide.

©2010 Merri Lisa Johnson (P)2014 Audible, Inc.

awful

I didn't care for this book from three beginning. my therapist recommended it due to my recent attempt, it only made me want to try again.

Related Immediately

I thought this book was like reading my own diary. I could relate immediately to the writers own story. So much helpful information and knowledge. I just finished and plan to listen again and take notes on my own thoughts and reactions to similar situations that have happened in my own life.

A real gem of a discovery

The content of the book in and of itself is amazing. I enjoyed the combination of psychological research with the author's personal experiences. Since this was an audiobook there were times in which I was confused as to what was going on because the author goes back-and-forth between research and what sounds like poetry and then personal essay. I have a feeling it is easier to follow along with when reading the actual book. This did not detract from the overall experience too terribly much. At times the reader sounded like she was trying a little too hard to perform the book, but again not enough so to ruin the experience much.

Not your typical mental illness memoir

In witty, sardonic, heart-piercing language and brutal honesty, Merri Lisa Johnson both represents and deconstructs "borderline personality disorder". She talks back to clinical definitions, challenges pathologizing language, and reveals the humanity, suffering, and hope behind one of the most stigmatized diagnoses. A crucial read for anyone interested in BPD, but prepare to let go of your preconceptions. You might be left with more questions than answers, and I think that's a good thing.

Pretty good

It was a bit hard to follow. I enjoyed pretty much every aspect of it, though over half of it is her quoting other authors, musicians, or professionals in the psychology field. It's nice as someone who can't really relate to hear a story like this from the point of view of someone going through it. It helps me to understand what type of things may be going on inside of the mind of someone with BPD, when I otherwise would have had no idea- which was kind of the entire reason I chose this book.

Mirror of my life

I was diagnosed with BPD 20 years ago. I don't know if it is the fact that I also have BPD or not but I followed along this book without much of an issue and had so many points where I said that's my life, that's me. I've often said I should write a book about my life, that someone out there would read it and now I definitely think they would,. It definitely left me feeling a little less "crazy" at the end of the day because I know exactly how she felt so much of the time.

Hard to follow

The story is very hard to follow until the last chapter. Maybe this was done to show that the author’s clarity of thought or lack of clarity. I almost stopped listening halfway through because it was so disjointed at times, but I did want to find out how it ended. I think the story is ok, but again, very hard to follow.

Chaotic, disturbing, meaningless

I am a professor of psychology and thought this would be informative and interesting, but I must be honest to say that I did not understand what was going on. I am not a clinician, but I do teach about personality and attachment. This was a stream of consciousness with little grounding in time or space. I guess that may been what the author was getting at, she does have a psychiatric disorder, but after an hour of listening, I realized I wasn't going to learn anything and was not going to be entertained. I gave up. Wish I could return it. If you want to read a good memoir of a person who is grappling with a mental health disorder, read Andrew Solomon's "The Noonday Demon." He is knowledgeable, a terrific writer, and gives a very compelling account of how depression affects all aspects of a person's life, but also the gifts one receives as a result of this struggle. The reader ends up admiring Solomon, liking him, and wanting to learn more about his life.