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President Me
- The America That's in My Head
- Narrated by: Adam Carolla
- Length: 6 hrs
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President Me
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Publisher's summary
Imagine a world where New York Times best-selling author, comedian, actor, television, and podcast host Adam Carolla is the President of the United States. Can’t do it? You don’t have to! Adam has done it for you!
Podcast king Adam Carolla first shared his unique, but always funny world view in his New York Times best seller, In Fifty Years We’ll All Be Chicks - but he’s not done.
In President Me, Carolla shares his vision for a different, better America free from big issues like big government down to small problems like hotel alarm clock placement. Running on an anti-narcissism platform, President Carolla calls for a return to the values of an earlier time when stew and casserole were on every dinner table and there were no “service dogs” on airplanes. President Me hits right at the heart of what makes our country really annoying, and offers a plan to make all of our lives, but mostly Adam’s, much better.
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 360
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 355
What do the lives of Lincoln, Helen Keller, Joan of Arc, and other historical figures have in common with Paula Poundstone? In the hands of this wryly observant and self-deprecating comedian, the answer is outrageously funny and unexpectedly touching. Poundstone compares her crazy life to theirs, as she holds forth on her children, her career, and the time in her life when it appeared she would lose them both.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
More!
- By Evelyn on 02-11-07
By: Paula Poundstone
-
Stories I'd Tell in Bars
- By: Jen Lancaster
- Narrated by: Jen Lancaster, John Fletcher
- Length: 8 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 360
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 322
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 319
Unfiltered. Unapologetic. Older, but not wiser, Lancaster goes back to basics in this hilarious essay collection about everything from taking community policing classes to accidentally getting high with her waiter after a fancy dinner. These are the tales she'd tell if she met you in a bar... if she weren't too lazy to put on pants and go to a bar. Offering advice ranging from how to remain happily married to a man who refuses to blow his damn nose already to not creating An Incident at the cheese counter during an attempt at Whole30, she's you, only louder.
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2 out of 5 stars
-
self absorbed
- By D D H on 06-15-19
By: Jen Lancaster
-
Digging Up Mother
- A Love Story
- By: Johnny Depp - foreword, Doug Stanhope
- Narrated by: Doug Stanhope and Friends
- Length: 12 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 3,973
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3,648
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 3,641
Doug Stanhope is one of the most critically acclaimed and stridently unrepentant comedians of his generation. What will surprise some is that he owes so much of his dark and sometimes uncomfortably honest sense of humor to his mother, Bonnie.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Not my thing.
- By J. Harral on 01-27-18
By: Johnny Depp - foreword, and others
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The Death of Cool
- From Teenage Rebellion to the Hangover of Adulthood
- By: Gavin McInnes
- Narrated by: Gavin McInnes
- Length: 7 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 1,187
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 1,049
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 1,049
This is his story, or, rather, stories - lots of them, and all gut-punchingly hilarious, from that first far reach into a girl's tight jeans to turning forty with a cataclysmic party. In between you’ll hear about acid trips, threesomes, Nazi skinheads, his band Anal Chinook (Inuit for “warm wind”), Martians in northern Canada, throwing pedophiles in jail, dinner with the Clash, what happens when you crash Bill Maher's show wasted, and the true story of Vice magazine.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
if you don't buy this book, the terrorists win
- By Kelsey Gholi on 04-03-17
By: Gavin McInnes
-
Is This Anything?
- By: Jerry Seinfeld
- Narrated by: Jerry Seinfeld
- Length: 6 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 2,880
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 2,409
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 2,359
Since his first performance at the legendary New York nightclub “Catch a Rising Star” as a 21-year-old college student in fall of 1975, Jerry Seinfeld has written his own material and saved everything. “Whenever I came up with a funny bit, whether it happened on a stage, in a conversation, or working it out on my preferred canvas, the big yellow legal pad, I kept it in one of those old school accordion folders,” Seinfeld writes. “So I have everything I thought was worth saving from 45 years of hacking away at this for all I was worth.”
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1 out of 5 stars
-
Joke, joke, joke. Boring, boring, boring.
- By ECMILLER on 10-11-20
By: Jerry Seinfeld
-
Wanna Bet?
- A Degenerate Gambler's Guide to Living on the Edge
- By: Artie Lange
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 355
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 319
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 316
The two-time best-selling author, comedian, actor, and radio icon explains the philosophy that has kept his existence boredom-free since the age of 13 - the love of risk. An avid sports better and frequent card player, Lange believes that the true gambler gets high not from winning, but from the chaotic unknown of betting itself. He recounts some of his favorite moments, many of which haven't involved money at all. In this candid and entertaining memoir, he looks back at the times he's wagered the intangible and priceless things in life: his health, his career, and his relationships.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
who needs Artie (to read)
- By B. Wenners on 08-24-18
By: Artie Lange
-
The Kings of Cool
- A Prequel to 'Savages'
- By: Don Winslow
- Narrated by: Holter Graham
- Length: 7 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 783
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 699
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 703
In Savages, Don Winslow introduced Ben and Chon, twentysomething best friends who risk everything to save the girl they both love, O. Now, in his high-octane prequel, Winslow reaches back in time to tell the story of how Ben, Chon, and O became the people they are. Spanning from 1960s Southern California to the recent past, it is a tale of family in all its forms. As the younger generation does battle with drug dealers and crooked cops, they learn that their future is inextricably linked with their parents' history.
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3 out of 5 stars
-
The truth always come home...
- By Darwin8u on 09-28-17
By: Don Winslow
-
Lawn Boy
- By: Jonathan Evison
- Narrated by: P. J. Ochlan
- Length: 8 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 278
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 247
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 247
For Mike Muñoz, a young Chicano living in Washington State, life has been a whole lot of waiting for something to happen. Not too many years out of high school and still doing menial work - and just fired from his latest gig as a lawn boy on a landscaping crew - he knows that he's got to be the one to shake things up if he's ever going to change his life. But how?
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2 out of 5 stars
-
CATEGORY AND SUMMARY MISLEADING
- By Gretchen on 05-01-18
By: Jonathan Evison
-
I Hate Everyone, Except You
- By: Clinton Kelly
- Narrated by: Clinton Kelly
- Length: 4 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 463
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 404
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 402
Clinton Kelly is probably best known for teaching women how to make their butts look smaller. But in I Hate Everyone, Except You, he reveals some heretofore unknown secrets about himself, like that he's a finicky connoisseur of 1980s pornography, a disillusioned critic of New Jersey's premier water parks, and perhaps the world's least enthused high school commencement speaker.
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1 out of 5 stars
-
Filthy language overshadowed stories
- By Doris on 04-29-17
By: Clinton Kelly
-
I Regret Nothing
- A Memoir
- By: Jen Lancaster
- Narrated by: Jen Lancaster
- Length: 9 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 410
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 367
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 363
New York Times best-selling author Jen Lancaster has lived a life based on re-invention and self-improvement. From Bitter Is the New Black to The Tao of Martha, she’s managed to document her (and her generation’s) attempts to shape up, grow up, and have it all - sometimes with disastrous results...Mistakes are one thing; regrets are another. After a girls’ weekend in Savannah makes her realize that she is - yikes! - middle-aged (binge watching is so the new binge drinking), Jen decides to make a bucket list and seize the day.
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3 out of 5 stars
-
The Smug Is Strong With This One
- By T. Filowitz on 05-24-15
By: Jen Lancaster
-
The Upside
- A Memoir
- By: Abdel Sellou
- Narrated by: Ray Chase
- Length: 5 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 45
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 43
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 43
In 1992, Count Phillippe Pozzo di Borgo, on the heels of his wife's diagnosis with a terminal illness, suffered a paragliding accident that left him a quadriplegic. Forty-two years old, trapped inside his luxurious Paris town house, he was an outcast for the first time in his life. Abdel, an unemployed Algerian immigrant who had been an outcast for his entire existence, would become Phillipe's unlikely caretaker. Quick-thinking, unsentimental, and more than a little wild, Abdel surprises both himself and his employer.
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5 out of 5 stars
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loved it
- By RockyDog on 01-31-19
By: Abdel Sellou
-
Be a Man
- The Ultimate Guide
- By: The Be a Man Guy
- Narrated by: The Be a Man Guy, John Fiore
- Length: 3 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 50
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 45
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 45
On Tik Tok, Instagram, and his podcast, The Be a Man Guy discusses what it takes to be a man. Now, this funny and insightful book showcases all new stories, vignettes, anecdotes, and pearls of wisdom.
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4 out of 5 stars
-
Be a Man
- By David S. on 10-05-23
By: The Be a Man Guy
-
Everything Is Awful
- And Other Observations
- By: Matt Bellassai
- Narrated by: Matt Bellassai
- Length: 6 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,038
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 952
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 948
From the break-out star of BuzzFeed and the People's Choice Award-winning comedian comes a collection of hilariously anguished essays chronicling awful moments from his life so far, the humiliations of being an adult, and other little indignities. Matt Bellassai has no idea what he's doing. Well, to be fair, he did become semi-Internet famous by getting drunk at work, making him a socially-acceptable - nay - professional alcoholic. He's got some things figured out. But the rest is all just a terrible, disgusting mess.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Best Audio Book I’ve heard ever.
- By M on 11-23-17
By: Matt Bellassai
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The Winter of Frankie Machine
- By: Don Winslow
- Narrated by: Dennis Boutsikaris
- Length: 9 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 3,029
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 2,651
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 2,647
Frank Machianno is a late-middle-aged ex-surf bum who runs a bait shack on the San Diego waterfront. An affable Italian with a love of people and life, he's a stand-up businessman, devoted father, and a beloved fixture in the community. He's also a hit man - specifically, a retired hit man. Back in the day when he was one of the most feared members of the West Coast Mafia, he was known as Frankie Machine.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
Five stars straight across the board
- By Eric Taylor on 06-28-12
By: Don Winslow
-
Easy for You to Say
- By: John Melendez
- Narrated by: John Melendez
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 128
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 116
-
Story3.5 out of 5 stars 116
Easy For You To Say is "Stuttering" John Melendez's memoir of his childhood being bullied in school for his stutter; his years as an on-air personality with The Howard Stern Show; and his subsequent 10-year career as a writer and on-air announcer for Jay Leno's Tonight Show. It details his famously acerbic relationships with celebrities he interviewed/insulted (Raquel Welch once punched him in the face). In the audiobook, Howard Stern emerges as a surprisingly mean, stingy, and megalomaniacal boss - and Jay Leno as a seeming sufferer from OCD.
-
2 out of 5 stars
-
Was expecting more
- By Amazon Customer on 10-25-18
By: John Melendez
-
Dave Barry Is Not Making This Up
- By: Dave Barry
- Narrated by: Arte Johnson, Dave Barry - introduction
- Length: 3 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 84
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 59
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 59
Yes, it's true: Pulitzer Prize-winning author Dave Barry's columns get out of the paper and sent around more than those of any other columnist in America. Join Dave as he runs for president, plays Claptonesque guitar in the world's most literary band (The Rock-Bottom Remainders), and gets the real scoop on all those UFO sightings. Warning: Dave Barry has a knack for giving his readers a few laughs and lots of expensive merchandise (ordered from the Home Shopping Club). No, we're not making this up!
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Dave Barry Makes Me Happy
- By Sher from Provo on 11-17-11
By: Dave Barry
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Ever wonder what you would say or do if you didn’t give a f--k? Adam Carolla can tell you. In his sixth book, the comedian, podcaster, and provocateur does what he does best—doles out advice and opinions with utter disregard for our politically correct, self-righteous, virtue signaling, woke times.
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Funnyman Adam Carolla is known for two things: hilarious rants about things that drive him crazy and personal stories about everything from his hardscrabble childhood to his slacker friends to the hypocrisy of Hollywood. He tackled rants in his first book, and now he tells his best stories and debuts some never-before-heard tales as well. Adam Carolla started broke and blue collar and has now been on the Hollywood scene for over 15 years. Yet he never lost his underdog demeanor.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Must have for any Adam Carolla Fan!
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In I’m Your Emotional Support Animal, Adam Carolla examines how our culture went careening off a cliff. We used to have one that created real warriors who fought world wars. Now it spawns social justice warriors who fight Twitter wars. He takes on those who are traumatized by Trump and “emotional support animal” owners who proclaim their victimhood at every airport. He stands up for the collateral damage of the #MeToo movement and for freedom of speech on “safe space” filled college campuses.
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3 out of 5 stars
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A little more crass than I was expecting
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It's a sad and eerie harbinger of our times that the Oprah-watching, crystal-rubbing, Whole Foods-shopping moms and their whipped attorney husbands have taken the ability to reason away from the poor schlub who makes the Bloody Marys. What we used to settle with common sense or a fist, we now settle with hand sanitizer and lawyers. Adam Carolla has had enough of this insanity and he's here to help us get our collective balls back.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Save your money: racist, ignorant, loud babble
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2 out of 5 stars
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NOT A BOOK
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Must have for any Adam Carolla Fan!
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Adam Carolla’s signature “rage” bits have become an integral part of his act, most recently as a recurring segment (“This Week in Rage”) on CBS Radio’s morning talk program The Adam Carolla Show. He is known as the co-host of the radio television show Loveline, co-creator and co-host of Comedy Central’s The Man Show, co-creator and the performer on Comedy Central and MTV’s Crank Yankers and former contestant on ABC’s Dancing with the Stars.
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What listeners say about President Me
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Kent
- 07-09-14
He's got my vote!
Would you consider the audio edition of President Me to be better than the print version?
The audio version is probably better due to Adam's performance.
Who was your favorite character and why?
I guess Adam.
Have you listened to any of Adam Carolla’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
Yes, this is the 3rd book I've listened to. All three were really good, but this is my favorite.
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
No, it was a little too much for one sitting.
Any additional comments?
I've listened to this about three times now and have laughed as hard each time.
Adam Carolla is one of the smartest, funniest and most grounded comedians out there. His views really do make a lot of sense. Of course, he gets a little ridiculous to make his points and to keep it funny, but the underlying ideals are great. I'd vote for him!
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- gmanftn
- 06-15-16
Great Book
I would vote for the Ace Man for president over Trump any day of the week!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
-
Story4 out of 5 stars
- Wade
- 03-06-18
Great read
I’d recommend this book to anyone. Per Ace man, I’d vote him in without a doubt!
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars
-
Story3 out of 5 stars
- Robbie D
- 01-24-15
Good Carolla....not Great Carolla...
I want to start with I loved in 50 Years We'll All be Chicks, I thought Not Taco Bell Material, and I truly wanted this to be a third knock out in a row but finished more like a TKO by decision. I feel like this could have been the perfect book for Carolla to layout everything we need to fix and how were going to fix it, he does this just not as in depth of what we are used to.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- NC Buckeye
- 02-10-15
Very funny and great points...
Loved the wit and humor presented by Adam and his delivery. He brought up some great points about our society and links to why and where issue are creeping up
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- John-Michael
- 06-09-14
Carolla's best thus far!
If you could sum up President Me in three words, what would they be?
Count my vote
Which scene was your favorite?
I listened to the chapter about the TSA at least 4 times, definitely my favorite part of the book.
Any additional comments?
Carolla's newest manifesto might be full of strong, inappropriate language, radical remarks, debatable sexist beliefs, and racially offensive comments, but had this work of art been void of such content, it would have disappointed.
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Joe Hampton
- 05-17-15
A very wise man for troubled times
Ace mans books should be part of the new required reading list in school, along with Adams other books. The guy is a great American success of true grit. I have listened to all his books on audible with my 6 kids and they are truly better for it. We have already pre-ordered his newest best seller.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Jeff S.
- 09-08-15
Hilarious!!
love listening to this guy!! his podcasts are great and this is just like listening to his podcasts! awesome!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- EB41
- 01-16-18
Truth and humor
Tho he tries to come across as sarcastic and humorous ( well maybe not) his words are hilarious but also spot on.
Best combination of laughs and thought provocation I’ve heard in a long time
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- edward walker
- 05-11-19
Trump Presidency outline
He pretty much outlined the Trump Presidency. The only thing he didn't get is how the media would protect the swamp.
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