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Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustles, and So-Called Hospitality | [Jacob Tomsky]

Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustles, and So-Called Hospitality

Jacob Tomsky has worked in hotels for more than a decade, doing everything from valet parking to manning the front desk. He's checked you in, checked you out, separated your white panties from the white bed sheets, parked your car, tasted your room service, cleaned your toilet, denied you a late check out, given you a wake-up call, eaten M&Ms out of your mini-bar, laughed at your jokes, and taken your money. And in Heads in Beds, he pulls back the curtain on the hospitality business.
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Publisher's Summary

In the tradition of Kitchen Confidential and Waiter Rant, a rollicking, eye-opening, fantastically indiscreet memoir of a life spent (and misspent) in the hotel industry.

Jacob Tomsky has worked in hotels for more than a decade, doing everything from valet parking to manning the front desk. He's checked you in, checked you out, separated your white panties from the white bed sheets, parked your car, tasted your room service, cleaned your toilet, denied you a late check out, given you a wake-up call, eaten M&Ms out of your mini-bar, laughed at your jokes, and taken your money. And in Heads in Beds, he pulls back the curtain on the hospitality business, revealing the crazy yet compelling reality of an industry we think we know. It is an incredibly funny, authentic, and irreverent chronicle of the highs and lows of hotel life and boy, is there a market for it: in 2010, the American lodging industry generated $127.7 billion in revenue. Prepare to be amused, shocked, and amazed as he spills the unwritten code of the bellhops, the antics that go on the valet parking garage, and the housekeeping department's dirty little secrets.

Prepare to be moved, too, by his insightful honesty about the profession; employees are often poorly paid and frequently abused. However, Heads in Beds is more than just a memoir. Jake explains the secrets of the industry, offering easy and legal ways to get what you need from your hotel without any hassle - from scoring late check-ins and upgrades to getting that pay-per-view charge knocked off your bill. This book will give you the knowledge you need to get the very best service from any hotel or property, from any business that makes its money from putting heads in beds. Or, at the very least, it will keep the bellhops from taking your luggage into the camera-free back office and stomping the crap out of it.

©2012 Jacob Tomsky (P)2012 Random House Audio

What the Critics Say

"Jacob Tomsky is a star. The kid writes like a dream. Heads in Beds is hilarious, literate, canny, indignant and kind - revealing an author who manages somehow to be both a total hustler and a complete humanitarian. I love this book. Keep an eye on this writer. I'm telling you, he's a star." (Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia)

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.1 (391 )
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Performance
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  •  
    Ted K Montreal, Quebec 02-04-13
    Ted K Montreal, Quebec 02-04-13
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    "Fine, but not worth going out of your way for"
    Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?

    I would not - it has a couple good tips which I could tell them myself, and is not worth the ten hours of listening or whatever.


    Would you ever listen to anything by Jacob Tomsky again?

    Only if it was short.


    What about Jacob Tomsky’s performance did you like?

    He really knows his accents


    Did Heads in Beds inspire you to do anything?

    Steal from the minibar? I'm already generally very nice to hotel staff...I thought it would be more concise and filled with tips about what to do in hotels generally. It had a few tips but really, hearing about someone's work life is not my bag.


    Any additional comments?

    I'd bought this because Dan Savage raved about it on his podcast and then asked for tips about getting with a hotel worker...stuff like that was totally missing from the book, and in fact it was only mildly interesting.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jatin New Hyde Park, NY, United States 02-04-13
    Jatin New Hyde Park, NY, United States 02-04-13 Member Since 2012
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    "Entertaining narrative of the inside story"
    Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

    Yes


    What did you like best about this story?

    Gives nice little tid bits and advice about hotel life in an entertaining story, that would have been entertaining even as a fictional book.


    Have you listened to any of Jacob Tomsky’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

    No


    Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    No. Did laugh at times.


    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Hannah BARRINGTON, IL, United States 02-04-13
    Hannah BARRINGTON, IL, United States 02-04-13
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    "Fascinating (if a bit long-winded)"
    What made the experience of listening to Heads in Beds the most enjoyable?

    Really interesting behind the scenes information about hotels - I will definitely think differently next time I check-in to one! Also, easy to connect and sympathize with the main character, as many of us have had those first terrible jobs.


    Who was your favorite character and why?

    The main character & narrator, Tommy.


    What do you think the narrator could have done better?

    There were times when his narrative grew a bit whiny - as if no one else had ever had such a difficult job or situation as him.


    Any additional comments?

    Worth a read, if just for the helpful hotel hints! But you'll get more from it than that.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Nathan Tallahassee, FL, United States 02-03-13
    Nathan Tallahassee, FL, United States 02-03-13
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    2
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    "I'm in the business for 15 years"
    Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

    I would definitely recommend this book for anyone who is interested in the inside of the hotel business. I've in the hotel business for 15 years, and a lot of what he says is true. It made me laugh, brought back some good times, and brought back some times I'd rather just forget about. Either way it's a great book. I like that the author read his own book because he really does give some of the characters that image that you can really see. For me it was great because I could relate to many of the issues.


    Who was your favorite character and why?

    Of course Tommy, but Perry is a good one too.


    What about Jacob Tomsky’s performance did you like?

    How he added that great voice to Perry and other characters.


    If you were to make a film of this book, what would be the tag line be?

    All in a day's work


    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Wes Fair Oaks, CA, United States 01-31-13
    Wes Fair Oaks, CA, United States 01-31-13 Member Since 2011
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    "An Eye Opener"

    Laugh out Loud Funny! An awesome look from the other side of the name badge. Cant wait to listen again.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    J. Adams USA 01-29-13
    J. Adams USA 01-29-13 Member Since 2009

    MrBizzleTex

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    "A worthwhile use of a credit - easy & entertaining"

    This book was a fun listen and a worthwhile use of a credit. The stories are entertaining - if not always told with a cohesive narrative - and for someone like me who generally sticks to nonfiction/history it was a great easy listen/distraction. I liked that Mr. Tomsky narrated the book himself as the flourishes he adds to his own stories greatly improve the listen. Don't buy it if you're expecting Dave Eggers or David Sedaris type essays - also don't buy it if you're looking for honest to goodness travel tips. I thought the publishers pushing the book as having travel/hotel upgrade tips was disingenuous - Mr. Tomsky does use 'tips' as gateways to tell a story the 'insider tip' he offers is almost always give a big tip.

    In short - well narrated, funny, easy listening....would be great for a long plane flight.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Amazon Customer 01-25-13 Member Since 2010
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    "Bought it on a whim and enjoyed it!"
    Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

    Yes, I already have.


    Who was your favorite character and why?

    Well, Jacob of course. He's funny and entertaining.


    What does Jacob Tomsky bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?

    He reads his book well and it's funny to listen to his inflection.


    If you were to make a film of this book, what would be the tag line be?

    Tip the bellman.


    Any additional comments?

    It's entertaining and likely useful to hotel guests.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    "unknown" Austin, TX, United States 01-16-13
    "unknown" Austin, TX, United States 01-16-13 Member Since 2011
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    "Coud not put it down"

    This book was just fantastic, I could not stop listening and listening to the whole thing in one day (at the gym and doing housework.. I'm not that lazy!). I was thourally engrossed in the interesting life of working at a hotel. Tomsky paints a wonderful picture of what it is like to work in a high end hotel well also providing useful infromation about how to get free upgrades. I love everything about this book.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jason Vicksburg, MI, United States 12-19-12
    Jason Vicksburg, MI, United States 12-19-12 Member Since 2011
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    "Great background information for travelers"
    Would you consider the audio edition of Heads in Beds to be better than the print version?

    Yes, it paints a much better picture.


    What was one of the most memorable moments of Heads in Beds?

    When the author realized he was in the business for life and it was his most beneficial option for employment.


    What about Jacob Tomsky’s performance did you like?

    Absolutely Excellent Performance!! Jacob Tomsky got you into the story with the way he read it. Excitement and all! Great Performance!


    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    DMTZ CENTRAL TEXAS 12-05-12
    DMTZ CENTRAL TEXAS 12-05-12 Member Since 2012
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    "Awesome"

    Great story. Lots of good ideas. As a frequent traveler we will have to see..

    1 of 2 people found this review helpful
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