Between Us

How Cultures Create Emotions

By: Batja Mesquita

Narrated by: Mikhaila Aaseng

Length: 8 hrs and 41 mins

Publisher's summary

A pioneer of cultural psychology argues that emotions are not innate, but made as we live our lives together.

“How are you feeling today?” We may think of emotions as universal responses, felt inside. Using decades-long, cutting-edge research, acclaimed psychologist Batja Mesquita asks us to reconsider emotions through the lens of what they do in our relationships, both one-on-one and within larger social networks. From an outside-in perspective, readers will understand why pride in a Dutch context does not translate well to North Carolina, or why one’s anger at a boss does not mean the same as your anger to a partner in a close relationship. By looking outward at relationships at work, school, and home, we can better judge how our emotions will be understood, how they might change a situation, and how they change us.

Brilliantly synthesizing original psychological studies and stories from peoples across time and geography, Between Us skillfully argues that acknowledging differences in emotions allows us to find common ground, humanizing and humbling us all for the better.

©2022 Batja Mesquita (P)2022 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.

LOVE IT!

I LOVE IT! I'd give 10 stars if I could. This is the best pop science book to date (in fact, it may be the only one?) exploring how our emotions are shaped by our socio-cultural contexts rather than being innate, universal constants (as the field of psychology would have us believe). I love that Mesquita discusses the concept of cultural fit and how particular cocktails of emotion can be optimal in one context but detrimental in another - I personally find this to be one of the most fascinating and difficult aspects of the human experience. Though research-based, this book verges on self-help for me and puts so much of my emotional life in perspective. I am so glad it exists!

Mesquita writes for a fairly general audience and simplifies some of these topics a bit, but she still manages to include quite a bit of nuance in a digestible format. She stays true to the body of research in this field and references it frequently (rather than offering her personal opinion as theory without reference, as many pop science writers do). I'd recommend this to basically all humans, and particularly humans that work with others' emotions (like therapists, social workers, and other caring professions).

For anyone interested in other quintessential popular reading for the topic of "psychological anthropology," I also recommend:

Crazy Like Us: The Globalization of the American Mind by Ethan Watters
Do Parents Matter?: Why Japanese Babies Sleep Soundly, Mexican Siblings Don't Fight, and American Families Should Just Relax by Robert and Sarah LeVine

Lastly, I read this on audiobook and the narration was very good. I often find non-fiction narrators to be too stiff, and while this was on the dryer side of things, I thought Mikhaila Aaseng struck a nice balance.

Amazing!!!

Brilliant! I learned so much about how different people and cultures interpret emotions. I highly recommend this book!

Superfluous for those with common sense.

Talk about stating the bloody obvious. Be a little aware, be a little quiet, observe a little and you will learn ten times more than the 'lessons' in this book. Awfully written, and incredibly boring.