Funny Religious

Teach your child patience !!! "You forgot the mail?!?!" The king yelled at the snail. But the snail stayed as calm as could be. He was not afraid of the king, you see. He knew where the gift was; he knew what to do. The monsters learned that patience pays off too. We are all familiar with the phenomenon of children wanting everything "here and now". This story describes just such a situation. I hope you and your children will enjoy it and learn from it. The forest monsters woke up & there was a sign on the tree. They had been invited to the Monster King’s birthday party. Everyone would ...

Teaching Kids the Importance of Sleep * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * At night when most kids were dozing so deep, Michael could never quite manage to sleep. His mother would read him one book, or two, His father would sing ‘till his face turned blue, All-day Michael ran and played and kicked ball, But then he’d just shrug: “I’m not tired at all.” Real-life issue/Imaginary Tale - Great Lesson! I learned about this cute little rhyming book on FB, and I decided to download it using the kindle app on my phone, and I'm glad that I did. What a fun book to cozy up with a child for a ...

Pet peeves been trailing mud all over your nice, bright outlook? Let Chonda Pierce help you clean up your attitude with a little deep-cleansing, sparkling-fresh humor! This comedian, singer, and preacher's daughter has a knack for finding merriment in those little things that can drive anyone...

Welcome to Heaven, Inc., the grossly mismanaged corporation in the sky. For as long as anyone can remember, the founder and CEO (known in some circles as "God") has been phoning it in. Lately, he's been spending most of his time on the golf course. And when he does show up at work, it's not to...

Shy and socially awkward Fitzwilliam Darcy may finally have a chance to impress Elizabeth Bennet, the woman who he has spent years pining over. If only she didn’t hate him... Mr. Darcy never expected to fall in love. Especially after being blackmailed into a marriage. Unfortunately, he falls in love with Miss Bennet instead of his wife. In an effort to protect his heart, he has spent several years avoiding Miss Bennet and pushing her away, which hasn’t been easy considering they share a brother-in-law. But when he loses his wife in a tragic accident, Miss Bennet moves into his home to ...

He’s a comedian. He’s a YouTube sensation. And now he becomes an author. Best known for his song parodies and riffs on yoga pants and homeschooling, Tim Hawkins now shares his perspective on life in the 21st century in his long-awaited debut book. Tim's topics are as wide-ranging as his...

Four children's Great books, all rolled into one. best for bedtime stories beginner / early reader poetry for kids. best animals stories, value tales

A sapphic bookstore romance about fresh starts and finding that one person who feels like home. "Snappy, smart, and endlessly swoon-worthy, With Stars In Her Eyes is a front-row ticket to a love story that’s impossible to put down." - Karelia Stetz-Waters, author of Behind the Scenes...

For those considering walking the Camino de Santiago or just interested in learning more about it, the author shares what led him to his pilgrimage, his initial concerns, the preparation and experiences while walking, the time and financial investment, and his reflections after the walk. He offers a look at the Camino journey that begins before you take your first step and does not end even after your last.

El tío Manuel se despertó una mañana de mal humor, La alarma de su reloj lo molestó por el ruido abrumador. Gritó: “¡Cállate, reloj!” y agitó su puño fuertemente, Presionó el botón de APAGADO de forma insolente.

♥ Wheel Power ♥ Little Wheely rolled round and round, all on his own he spun on the ground. Wheels had a purpose, except for him, which is why he felt sad and so grim. ◆ All his friends were wheels too, yet they all had something to do. He watched them roll all night and day, all very busy – rushing on their way.

El tío Manuel pensaba que los días silenciosos eran los mejores, Se relajaba en casa con un libro y tenía descansos mayores. Las fiestas ruidosas no eran del agrado del tío Manuel, En su cumpleaños su familia lo sorprendía con un pastel.

The North Wind and the Sun ******************************* " One day in late spring with the sun shining strong She announced to the North Wind, “You do not belong!” “It’s time you must leave, so things can get hot.” But the North Wind said simply, “Oh, no, I will not.” ********** About Aesop’s Fables ****** Who was Aesop, and why are his fables famous all over the world? In fact, very little is known about this mysterious Ancient Greek figure. He is thought to have been a slave originally from Africa, but even that isn’t known for certain. But his stories, with their ...

Hace mucho, mucho tiempo, en un lugar muy muy lejano Un gran barco pirata salió a navegar un día temprano, Llevaba sacos de plata y oro que valían mucho dinero, Y tres piratas malvados, fuertes y de carácter aventurero.

El cazador ************** Un día caluroso de verano, frente al ventilador Estaba el gato blanco sudando por el fuerte calor De pronto, fuera de la ventana se quedó espiando A una pequeña ave que afuera estaba trinando Desde la espalda al frente, el gato se pudo estirar Y pensó: “¡Que buen día este para salir y cazar!”

When Lisa Marsh reluctantly agrees to serve Thanksgiving dinner at the local community center, she’s not prepared for the chaos that ensues. Between the lively teenagers, fiercely independent veterans, eccentric seniors, and one particularly gruff homeless man named Pete, the evening spirals into a disaster. But when her best friend dares her to do more, Lisa accepts the challenge: she’s going to help Pete turn his life around—whether he likes it or not. Her plan? Simple: clean him up (starting with a shave), find him a job, and make him respectable. Pete, however, has no interest in ...

José era un granjero feliz y Pedro era su vecino, Sembraban pepinos y tomates en la montaña de encino. Ambos granjeros trabajaban muy duro; difícil era su vida, Pero tenían comida para sus familias; recompensa merecida Aunque a veces en casa después de un día de trabajo cansado Soñaban con tener una vida mejor de lo que habían pensado.

Everything is all Doug’s fault. The Horn of Destiny is missing from the Seraphim Symphonic practice room and the Apocalypse is set to begin prematurely. He always was a clumsy GA-1 (Guardian Angel First Degree). No wonder he never got promoted. Now the fate of the world rests in the hands of his human client, a mentally unstable trumpet player named Steve who takes all his advice from his pet cat Smokey. Oh, and someone on earth had the bright idea to run the dreaded Horn of Destiny through a 3-D printer and sell copies on eBay. God help us all!

Bloomsbury presents I Drink Therefore I Am by Roger Scruton, read by Kris Dyer. Here Scruton explains the connection between good wine and serious thought with a heady mix of humour and philosophy. We are familiar with the medical opinion that a daily glass of wine is good for the health and...

In this irreverent and entertaining world history, acclaimed author of On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down James Fell explores humanity's checkered past to determine if we can overcome avarice, misogyny, zealotry, and hate to ultimately save our species from extinction. Behold! Profane and...