France Humour

Look, maybe you're a nice girl, but we're guessing you're more like us or you probably wouldn't have downloaded this audiobook. But being nice is just not the way to get what you want. And this audiobook is about getting what you want. Not in a finding happiness, giving back to the world, being grateful for what you have sort of way. But in a ruling your world, being the most desired, powerful badass in the room way, so you can come out on top of any situation: guys, career, friends, enemies, whatever.

Sylvestre Bonnard is a mild-mannered, kind-hearted book collector and antiquarian, a little tyrannized by his housekeeper maybe, but nonetheless respected and eminent in his field of research into the abbeys, abbots and monks of medieval France. He has spent his life with his books, and knows little of the ways of the world. Resigned to reaching old age and retirement without being able to complete his life's work, he suddenly comes across the one thing that would not only complete it, but that would crown it with success. He heads off on an adventure to get his hands on this treasure and ...

As hotel manager Tom Eastham’s retirement approaches, his best friend tries to persuade him to get back into the sport which he gave up over thirty years earlier. Initially unwilling to brave the roads after so long off the bike, he gradually comes around to the idea of having another bash at cycling and takes to the Lancashire lanes once more. This light-hearted but incisive account traces his first six months back in the saddle, during which time the life-enhancing possibilities of cycling gradually dawn on him as he samples various facets of the sport, complemented by some rather ...

What do fairy tales, such as “Little Red Riding Hood,” “Sleeping Beauty,” and “Hansel and Gretel,” have to do with French peasant life in the eighteenth century? What does a cat massacre reveal about the relationship between artisans and the bourgeois in early modern France? In Robert Darnton’s, The "Great Cat Massacre," the underlying themes of fairy tales and the circumstances surrounding a large killing of cats provide the answers to these questions and reveal the attitudes and concerns of peasants and artisans in eighteenth century France.

Simon Shaw, a rumpled, fortyish English advertising executive, has decided to leave it all behind, and heads of to France to transform an abandoned police station in the Luberon into a small but world-class hotel. On his side, Simon has a loyal majordomo and a French business partner who is as practical as she is ravishing. But he hasn't counted on the malignant local journalist—or on the mauvaise types who have chosen the neighboring village as the site of their latest bank robbery.

There is so much to write about the French. Because they invented cinemas, bicycles, cars, photography, radioactivity, but also the bra, the croque-monsieur, the garbage can, and dentures. Because the French express themselves in a language qualified as one of the sexiest, albeit with sounds so often considered animalistic: coucou, quoi, oui…. Because in France, we intrinsically like to rebel against everything: system, government, our employer, and we go so far as to go on strike preventively against a law that does not yet exist. A country where artists transform urinals into works of ...

Introduction to Le Tour Once more I want to inspire you to travel – to France. I have been delighted at the lovely responses I have received to my books and have enjoyed supplying more precise suggestions to some of you personally. This book ties together our journeys in France as a cohesive tour de France. Most of this book comprises of fresh writing but to make the tour flow I have included relevant excerpts from my four book French Travel Series. If you are unfamiliar with those books, I hope you will go on to enjoy the full story of our experiences in French regions such as Provence, ...

Anatole France (1844-1924) was a French poet, journalist, and novelist who wrote several best sellers. The Revolt of the Angels is a mischievous take on the theology of modern society; it chronicles the thoughts of Arcade, a lowly guardian angel, as he discovers the ugly truths of his divine master in the library of his human charge As Maurice, the young man abandoned by Arcade, struggles to get his guardian back, one gets a view of a wide variety of the author’s artistic personalities, most of whom are fallen angels.

Scotland, 1567. A pregnant Mary, Queen of Scots is dragged out of her palace by rebel lords and imprisoned in the isolated Lochleven Castle, an ancient fortress surrounded by a vast lake. Her infant son and heir, James, has been captured by her enemies. Accompanying Mary are two inconspicuous serving women: observant, ambitious Jane and romantic, quick-tempered Cuckoo, who endeavor to keep their mercurial mistress company while sharing the space of a claustrophobic room over the course of their eleven-month forced stay. Their hosts want them dead. They'll settle for Mary's abdication.

Renowned cookbook writer Paul Stuart, renewed and refreshed from his time in Tuscany, has returned to Scotland to work on his new book. Writing, though, is complicated by Paul's changed domestic circumstances. His editor and new girlfriend, Gloria, has moved in with him despite not being specifically invited, and she's brought her two rather demanding Siamese cats. When Paul's cousin, Chloe, suggests Paul visit her in the French countryside, Paul jumps at the chance. However, once he arrives, he finds his fortunes tangled up with the infamous local restaurant.

Julie has her freedom, a dream job as a pastry chef, and a corpse growing cold on her floor... Welcome to Beldoc, a small town in the heart of Provence, imbued with lavender and fresh baked bread! You can idle around, or you can puzzle out a murder mystery. When a man dies on her watch in her pâtisserie, newly divorced chef Julie Cavallo is dismayed. It isn’t that she’s a suspect. The local gendarmerie captain signs off the death as a natural event. A heart attack. But for a reason she won’t discuss, Julie suspects Maurice Sauve was poisoned. What’s a girl to do? She’ll ignore ...

In A CASTILIAN ADVENTURE former teacher Jane Holden relates the story of her move to northern Spain. At fifty-seven she feels that life may be passing her by, so she decides to put her Spanish studies into practice and sets off on an open-ended trip in order to immerse herself in another culture. Starting in Madrid and intending to tour Castile and León, she soon decides to go with the flow and allow new friendships to influence her eventual destination. This amusing and informative account is a must-read for all those interested in the possibilities Spain offers away from the crowded coast.

Ian Moore is a stand-up comedian in the UK and a husband, father of three boys, farmhand and chutney-maker in France. He is a mod in both walks of life and most of his time is spent travelling grumpily between the two. Comedian, mod and professional grump Ian Moore has had enough. Tired of being unable to park anywhere near his cramped house in a noisy town he doesn’t like, he hatches a plan to move his wife and young son to a remote corner of the Loire Valley in search of serenity and space.

From the satirical pen of one of France's greatest cynics comes the story of Candide - young, innocent, guileless - who is cast upon the world after Baron Thunder-ten-trockh learns that his lusty daughter, Cunegonde, has tried to seduce the young man. The novel chronicles Candide's adventures with his blindly optimistic tutor, Dr. Pangloss, through any number of disastrous experiences, as they search for the answers to life's perennial questions.

When Thomas Hardy, (who is anything but a famous author), finds himself being ejected from his home he makes a decision. Forced to change his lifestyle, he decides to stop writing manuals for flat pack furniture and try his hand at fiction. This darkly humorous tale with a hint of a thriller follows Tom as he stumbles through his new life, staggering from disaster to disaster, as he attempts to come up with a plot for his new endeavour. What he hadn't bargained for was the unfortunate chain of events he sets off, causing real life to start to mimic his story, as he is pursued by a serial ...

An indispensable, richly informative, and always entertaining audio sourcebook on Provence, by the writer who has made the region his own. Though organized from A to Z, this is hardly a conventional work of reference. It is rather a selection of those aspects of Provence that Peter Mayle, in almost 20 years there, has found to be the most interesting, curious, delicious, or down-right fun.

When Carl Coulton is finally released from prison his kindly probation officer suggests cycling as a form of therapy. Carl needs to let off steam, and how better to do it than by pounding the pedals on the leafy Lancashire lanes close to his home? Therapy it proves to be, but of a kind that no-one but Carl could have imagined. In a story which will cause motorists to give those dratted bikes a wider berth and allow harassed cyclists to live out their wildest fantasies, we follow Carl’s progress from rehabilitated ex-con to the most perilous man on two wheels in living memory. With ...

IDLE RICH is the entertaining account of one man’s attempt to turn over a new leaf in Spain. When lifelong underachiever Richie Bannister is offered free board and lodgings in a seaside resort on the south-western coast of Andalucia, he jumps at the chance to escape from the dull Lancashire town where he’s been stuck for the last forty-odd years. His host Peter, a retired photographer, turns out not to be the doddery old fellow he’s expecting to meet, but a man on a mission into which Richie finds himself inadvertently drawn. After his so-far aimless life, this new commitment proves ...

A CURIOUS AFFAIR is the funny, heart-warming account of an unlikely liaison between a restless Englishwoman and an enigmatic Andalusian man. Thoroughly fed up of commuting to her high-flying job in London, 44-year-old Claire Hadland decides to ditch both her unfaithful husband and her marketing career and spend some time abroad. On her arrival in Guardo, a small northern town, she sets about brushing up her Spanish and making friends, but during a visit to a tiny mountain hamlet she meets Daniel, a rather peculiar man from the south who has as little reason to be in rural Palencia as ...

THE RELUCTANT EXPAT is Alan Laycock’s light-hearted account of his transition to life in a new country. Alan has no desire to move to Spain, but his sister Cathy and brother-in-law Bernie are going regardless, so he decides to tag along. Despite his initial pessimism, he soon sees that life in their new home has more to offer than he first suspected, and by befriending a pair of local oldies he finds surprising new opportunities opening up to him. A coin dealer by trade and an idler by nature, his new, dynamic attitude surprises Cathy, Bernie and, most of all, himself, as he gets to grips...