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Honest, silly, and laugh-out-loud funny...the first book in Liz Pichon's hugely popular, award-winning Tom Gates series. Tom Gates is the master of excuses for late homework: dog attacks, spilt water, lightning... Tom's exercise book is full of his doodles, cartoons and thoughts as well as comments from his long-suffering teacher, Mr Fullerton.

General George Joulwan played a role in many pivotal world events during his long and exceptional career. Present at both the rise and fall of the Berlin Wall, he served multiple tours in Germany during the Cold War and two tours in Vietnam. By chance, he was recruited as Nixon's White House deputy chief of staff and witnessed the last acts of the Watergate drama first-hand.

Back to school, but it's not all bad. Sports Day, the school fair and Tom's birthday are all coming up. And even better, his awful big sister, Delia, won't be at any of those events! On the downside, Granny Mavis is threatening to make his birthday cake – uh-oh! But on the other hand, Mr Keen has asked Dogzombies to perform in front of the whole school! Yeah! Maybe they can even play at the school disco, too. How can the term turn out any less than seriously amazing?

Tom Gates Extra Special Treats is about hard work, annoyance and humiliation - and is as brilliantly entertaining as the rest of the series. It's really cold outside, and we're all hoping it's going to snow. Yeah! Derek and I could make a snow Rooster and have a snowball fight (look out, Delia!). Granny Mavis has started to knit me a new winter jumper, but by the looks of things I'm not sure it's going to fit....

Q: Who wants their five star funny story included in Oakfield School's story book? A: Everyone! But what will Tom write about? Inspiration strikes when he looks at his excellent collection of odd objects and remembers the funny stories behind each one. Starting with Great Great Aunt Aggie's fake bird hat, the weird stone with a hole and his very special doodle pen. Marcus wants to write about Tom (which is annoying), Amy's got a funny poem and Norman's story is all about...cheese. But Mr Fullerman can only choose the five star stories – will Tom get his work in on time?

Tom is off on a school activity trip in the fifth instalment in Liz Pichon's best-selling series. Exciting news! Mr Fullerman announces that class 5F are going on an activity break! Which should be fun. As long as I don't get stuck in a group with anyone who snores or, worse still, with...Marcus Meldrew. Delia is already threatening to paint my room funny colours while I'm away. Which is annoying. I just hope the only surprise I have when I get home is the new pet that I hear Mum and Dad talking about.

Illusionist and novice spy Alan Campbell just got out of one relationship only to have another woman walk into his life: the Lady Camilla Favonius of the Imperial Inquisition. He's close to broke and left without orders. She wears plate armor in the field and around her heart. Is the lady just what the Plague Doctor ordered, or will his efforts to get a job and woo her only leave him jaded...or dead? 

Tips for being top of the class (sadly...I did none of these things). Stay awake in lessons (it helps). Don't draw hilarious pictures of your teachers. Avoid the class bully to stay out of trouble. Don't let Mum and Dad write anything in your school planner. Don't let your grumpy sister, Delia, boss you around. (Technically not a school issue - but still important.) I'm trying to get voted onto the school council as well - but thanks to the above list it's not exactly going to plan.

Carol Delaney confronts a parent’s worst nightmare when her twelve-year-old daughter and a friend go missing from a gated resort on a Caribbean island. The local police believe the girls were abducted by a global organization that has a branch on the island and is involved in criminal activities, including human trafficking. A yacht belonging to local members of the organization was seen leaving the harbor around the time when the girls disappeared, but the police find no evidence that the girls were onboard, so they can’t arrest the suspects. After they have determined that the girls ...

The 13th hilarious audiobook in the ever-popular Tom Gates series! Having two sets of grandparents is turning out to be VERY GOOD for me. The wrinkles are KEEN on giving presents, AND they're planning a FAMILY OUTING, too, which is going to be EPIC! Delia wants to come as well. (Why?) I can always ignore her.

Recently deceased and squishy as hell, Alan, a newly minted Illusionist, is forced to flee for his life. He needs time to deal with his loss, both in-game and IRL, but first he'll have to escape his crazy ex, the treacherous Firebrand, Thalia Daceran. On his way to safety and revenge, he'll team up with Titus, the Imperial spymaster, as well as a crew of pirates, commandos, and even a shapeshifting Mimic with a taste for blood. His path leads to Wyrdtide, a gaslit city hidden in mists and governed by dark demigods. But even with Alan dead, the world marches on.

An all-new production of the phenomenal bestseller, now featuring exclusive new conversations with the authors! For more than two decades, legendary trainer Tim Grover has taken the greats—Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, Dwyane Wade, and hundreds of relentless competitors in sports, business, and...

Tom Gates is Ha! Ha! HILARIOUS! He's created a brand new comic Ants in Pants to make everyone (even Delia) laugh. Inspiration for his new comic is everywhere! There's Mr Keen's unicycle mishap and their NEW supply teacher Miss Jam (whose first name is NOT Strawberry or Traffic – but it should be). Class 5F LOVE Miss Jam's lessons. Mr Fullerman, not so much. BUT when Tom's comic falls into the wrong hands, everything starts to go wrong. HOW will he get himself out of this MESS? How will he make everyone laugh again? Will Marcus help him out? Hmmm ... maybe.

This book contains: – MONSTERS – MYSTERY – A MUSIC FESTIVAL – MISSING stuff – ME and Marcus (Not necessarily in THAT order). AND a very strict supply teacher – but don't let that put you off!

Crammed with stories and sniggers, this hysterical journal brings you more manic mayhem from the crazy world of Tom Gates. No school for two whole weeks leaves Tom with heaps of time for the important things in life. Yeah! He can forget all about lessons and the irritating Marcus Meldrew and save his energy for good stuff! Stuff like: inventing new ways to annoy his sister Delia. (So many).

This is the art box of my DREAMS. Earning extra pocket money to buy it will be TRICKY. I’ll need to HELP OUT a LOT. Wash Delia’s clothes? Why not. Clean Dad’s shed? Yes, please! Sweep up the leaves? No problem! But when a HUGE STORM hits Oakfield Town and wrecks the library roof, a big campaign begins to FIX IT FAST. Can our school reach the target before the kids from Great Manor? Hmmm...eventually.

If the new Matthews Corporation Jump Gate fails to span 2.5 million light years to the Andromeda galaxy, the heavily invested star-faring civilization of the Milky Way will face economic ruin and brutal war. The Star Lawyers must run a gauntlet to the Rim, dodging pirates, politicians, prelates, and predatory star nations intent on seizing the new Gate to Andromeda.

Here's my excellent plan to make DogZombies the best band in the whole wide world! How hard can it be? (Very.) Right now I'm going to: 1. Write more songs (not about teachers). 2. Make a spectacular music video (easy). 3. Get some sleep (tricky when you're being kept awake by loud noises). 4. Annoy Delia (nothing to do with DogZombies but always fun).

The latest hilarious audiobook in the ever-popular Tom Gates series! Working hard on my school project, I've found out ALL kinds of interesting facts I wasn't expecting to. Stuff like: Mum and Dad got together because of cake. (Full story inside). Cats sleep for 70% of their lives. Peppermint ice cream is just wrong. (True.).

While Forbidden Gates includes fresh insights for traditional, tried and true methods of overcoming darkness, it also unveils for the first time how breakthrough advances in science, technology, and philosophy—including cybernetics, bio-engineering, nanotechnology, machine intelligence, synthetic biology, and transhumanism—will combine to create mind-boggling game-changes to everything you have ever known about spiritual warfare.