In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, “The Sinister Quilt of Agnes Burr,” I talk about being an atheist who sometimes writes stories featuring religion — usually, Christianity.

As always, this commentary contains spoilers from the episode, so you might want to listen to “The Sinister Quilt of Agnes Burr” first.

Transcript >>

A group of older women in a quilting circle unwillingly summon Satan through their latest project’s design.

Content Advisory: “The Sinister Quilt of Agnes Burr” deals with summoning Satan to our plane of existence, so of course there’s mention of ancient cults, magic, and other paranormal things. While the violence in the story is mostly comedic, there is a fairly grisly scene not necessarily played for laughs. (But it is still kinda funny.) I also threw in trespassing, auto theft, property destruction, and passing mention of infidelity to round things out. And, of course, there’s swearing.

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Credits:

Music: Theme – Ergo Phizmiz. Story – Ludwig Moulin, licensed through Epidemic Sound.

Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund.

Transcript >>

In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest two Not About Lumberjacks stories, “The Art of the End” and “Christmas Miscellany 9,” I talk about the time constraints of running a narrated fiction podcast mostly by myself.

As always, this commentary contains spoilers from the last two episodes, so you might want to listen to “The Art of the End” and “Christmas Miscellany 9,” first.

Transcript >> (Coming Soon)

It’s that time — the annual Christmas episode!

What began as a one-time thing is now in its ninth year!

So what do we have this time?

How ’bout these three stories:

• “Bigfoot’s Here!” – A surprise involving a Bigfoot costume does not go as planned!
• “Above and Below” – Three survivors of a nuclear war—a billionaire in his bunker, the head of his security detail, and a technical writer who was hiking in the mountains when the missiles came down—navigate their way through a very different world.
• “Gifts Through Time” – A woman finds three items in an antique shop and does everything she can to find out the stories behind them.

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Before getting to the stories, I want to call attention to the two additional narrators who helped with this episode.

Cynthia Griffith is no stranger to Not About Lumberjacks. Next to me, no other person has read more of my work for the show. While she’s pulled back from all social media, you can learn more about her on the Not About Lumberjacks Talent page.

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AJ Fidalgo is normally a cast member in audiodramas — Madison On the Air, No Return, The Silt Voices, and Nine to Midnight to name a handful — but he proves he has narrating skills as well! He brings the second story, “Above and Below,” to life.

You can learn more about AJ at his website, ajfidalgo.com.

If you’re in need of an audio drama cast member or someone to narrate a story for you, I can say with confidence that he’s great to work with!

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And now, the usual content advisory…

Spread throughout the three stories making up this year’s Christmas episode are gun violence, minor gore, passing mention of implied suicidal ideation, conventional and nuclear wars, deaths, a vehicle accident (including the sounds…in case you’re listening to this while driving), and—of course—swearing!

No matter what you celebrate this season (or not), I wish you and yours all the best as we face down the end of another year.

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Credits:

Music: Theme – Ergo Phizmiz. Story – All music licensed through Epidemic Sound.

Story: Christopher Gronlund.

Narration: Christopher Gronlund, AJ Fidalgo, and Cynthia Griffith (she’s smart, and echews the world of social media).

Episode Transcript >>

Nine years ago, I released the first November anniversary “lumberjack” story. Titled “The Art of the Lumberjack,” I described it like this:

When Erik Nilsson has a minor heart attack and is told to take some forced time off of work to recuperate, he finally reads a book left to him by his father much earlier in life. What he finds hidden among the pages changes him forever…

Nine years later, we catch up with Erik and his father in a sequel to that story.

Content Advisory: “The Art of the End” deals with the death of a parent, an argument with an estranged parent, and…that’s really about it. Oh, there is one bit of swearing.

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Credits:

Music: Theme – Ergo Phizmiz. Story – Christopher Gronlund and an additional traditional track, licensed through Epidemic Sound.

Story: Christopher Gronlund.

Episode Transcript >>

The evening of August 8, I received a call from the police in the town where my mom lived that she was dead.

FOOM! Just like that…

Obviously, that has had an effect on story scheduling.

This short update is about what to expect the rest of the calendar year…
(Quick version: I’m skipping one scheduled story.)

In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, “Instead of Dreaming,” I talk about the real-life influences on the story, memories, healing, and how soothing the night can be.

As always, this commentary contains spoilers from the latest episode, so you might want to listen to that first.

Transcript >> (Coming Soon)

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Things mentioned in this episode:

• Ben Tanzer’s After Hours: Scorsese, Grief and the Grammar of Cinema.
• Ben Tanzer’s website.
• Ben Tanzer’s This Podcast Will Change Your Life.
• Wikipedia entry for Martin Scorsese’s After Hours.

The Chicago beef stand I mention is Susie’s, at 4126 West Montrose Avenue. I believe it’s now a taco stand called Taco Pros Cocina.

Photos of the tunnel mentioned in this episode:

The entrance. My friend Lee and I were the first in. (My nickname is, and still is, Ogre.) Later, we shared our secret with a couple other friends. The “TR” stands for Tunnel Rats.

I looked into the tunnel. Man, we were dumb!

I was so happy to see everything still there. So many time, memories shift over the years. I think I know who “Rob” is in the first image. No idea which Jason it was…or if it was even one of my friends.

I thought I was so damned funny writing STOP VANDALISM!!! in and act of…vandalism.

A high school English teacher comes to conclusions about life after recovering from a hit-and-run accident.

Content Advisory: “Enemy Wanted” deals with difficulty sleeping, a blurred sense of reality, crime, cartoonish violence, illness, a death, and wishing for an early end to life. That makes it sound dismal, but I assure you…it’s a blast of a story.

Also, it’s one with no swearing. Still, were it a movie, it would be rated PG (or maybe PG-13 for mature themes), so be aware. Also, because there are scenes with action, be prepared for the occasional surprising loud sound.

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Credits:

Music: Theme – Ergo Phizmiz. Story – Jospeh Beg, licensed through Epidemic Sound.

Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund.

Episode Transcript >>