Welcome to the Modern Husbands podcast, where any combination of Dr. Bruce Ross, Christian Sherrill, and Brian Page host national experts who share winning ideas to manage money and the home as a team.

I’m Brian Page, founder of Modern Husbands. Sometimes our listeners want more support than a podcast can give, individual or couple support, which I now provide. Details can be found at modernhusbands.com or you can email me at brian@modernhusbands.com.

For today’s podcast we welcome Melissa Hogenboom, an award-winning journalist and editor at the BBC who is the author of Breadwinners.

In this episode of the Modern Husbands podcast, we delve into the intricate dynamics of gender roles and economic anxiety. We explore the challenges faced by female breadwinners, the psychological impact of economic instability on men, and the evolving expectations of masculinity. Through insightful discussions, we uncover how societal norms and financial pressures shape relationships and individual well-being. Tune in to gain a deeper understanding of these pressing issues and discover actionable steps to foster equality and resilience in modern partnerships.

Show Notes

00:00 Introduction
02:44 What motivated you to write the book, Breadwinners?
04:36 Can you define what it means to be a breadwinner, and distinguish between sole and primary breadwinners?
07:49 Why do some men experience anxiety and stress when their wives are the breadwinners?
09:46 What are the traits and attitudes men possess that lead to high marital satisfaction when he is married to a female breadwinner?
13:29 Why is it that women who earn more often feel the need to overcompensate at home?
17:54 Can you explain the concept of 'exchange-bargaining’ and how money becomes a bargaining chip in domestic labor?
22:09 Can you describe financial control as a form of power that can easily veer into manipulation?
27:53 How do societal expectations differ for same-sex couples when it comes to earning and domestic responsibilities?
32:05 What does the science say about the benefits—for children and couples—of dads taking on caregiving roles?
37:03 What are the traits of the men who stay home and take advantage of parental leave, or do not have problems when their wife is the breadwinner?
40:50 What are the consequences of one partner with a low sense of power in the relationship?
42:48 You mention that too little power creates stress, but too much reduces empathy. How can couples find the right balance of shared influence in their relationship?
46:39 What are the small, actionable steps listeners can take today to start shifting power imbalances in their own relationships?

Purchase the book: https://melissahogenboom.com/breadwinners-2/

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Welcome to the Modern Husbands podcast, where any combination of Dr. Bruce Ross, Christian Sherrill, and Brian Page host national experts who share winning ideas to manage money and the home as a team.

I’m Brian Page, founder of Modern Husbands. Sometimes our listeners want more support than a podcast can give, individual or couple support, which I now provide. Details can be found at modernhusbands.com.

For today’s episode we welcome Dr. Julie Wayne, a Professor of Management at the Wake Forest University School of Business, specializing in work-family scholarship. Her research focuses on how work and personal lives intersect, examining work-family enrichment, the meaning and measurement of work-life balance, and the "invisible family load". Wayne has been recognized with the 2024 Kanter Award for Excellence in Work-Family Research for her significant contributions to the field.

In this episode, Dr. Wayne breaks down the concepts of mental and emotional load—and why they so often go unseen in relationships. She explains how these hidden responsibilities impact men and women differently, and shares practical strategies for couples to notice, share, and reduce the invisible load at home. Whether you're managing careers, kids, or both, this conversation offers actionable insights to strengthen your partnership. Enjoy the show.

Questions

00:00 Introduction
02:05 Where does your passion for your work originate?
03:32 What exactly is the “mental load,” and why do people call it invisible?
06:02 What does the mental load have to do with the intersection of work and home?
13:02 How does it generally show up differently for men and women?
18:17 How does the emotional load differ from the mental load, and why is it particularly challenging?
22:37 What are some practical ways husbands and partners can notice, share, or reduce the emotional labor at home?
31:17 Beyond the household, how can workplaces, policies, or broader societal expectations help men and women balance mental and emotional responsibilities more equitably?
35:49 What is one piece of simple and actionable advice you want to share with our listeners?

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Welcome to the Modern Husbands podcast, where any combination of Dr. Bruce Ross, Christian Sherrill, and Brian Page host national experts who share winning ideas to manage money and the home as a team.

I’m Brian Page, founder of Modern Husbands. Sometimes our listeners want more support than a podcast can give, individual or couple support, which I now provide. Details can be found at modernhusbands.com or you can email me at brian@modernhusbands.com.

For today’s podcast we welcome Dr. Jenny Olson, an Assistant Professor of Marketing at Indiana University's Kelley School of Business. Dr. Olson just released research examining how people predict happiness from buying something, what actually happens, and whether how poor or rich you are impacts how we feel about it. Enjoy the show.

Show Notes

00:00 Introduction
01:00 Fast overview of her previous groundbreaking research on joint bank accounts
03:45 Judging people in poverty who spend money
07:45 The findings from her research
09:50 What her research has to do with our basic needs
13:00 How to interpret the research and suggestions
14:32 How do common misconceptions about income levels affect people’s expectations from happiness from their experiences
17:05 What can dual career couples do to enhance their own happiness
19:46 The line between spending and compulsive spending for happiness
21:05 Examples of consumption experiences that she found drive happiness
22:03 Self care: people prioritize the self care of others before themselves
25:27 How has your research influenced your own views
29:09 One piece of practical advice people can use now in their lives based on your research

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Welcome to the Modern Husbands podcast, where any combination of Dr. Bruce Ross, Christian Sherrill, and Brian Page host national experts who share winning ideas to manage money and the home as a team.

I’m Brian Page, founder of Modern Husbands. Sometimes our listeners want more support than a podcast can give, individual or couple support, which I now provide. Details can be found at modernhusbands.com.

For today’s podcast we welcome Dr. Gary Barker and Dr. Taveeshi Gupta of Equimundo.

Dr. Gary Barker is the CEO and co-founder of Equimundo and a globally recognized leader in engaging men and boys to advance gender equality, with over 30 years of experience across more than 50 countries.

Dr. Taveeshi Gupta is the Senior Director of Research at Equimundo and a global expert on masculinities and gender with over 15 years of experience leading research on structural inequalities and their impact on youth and development.

The research at Equimundo was the origin of the evidence used by the Congressional Dads Caucus for proposed legislation.

Our conversation will center around Equimundo’s State of American Men 2025, a groundbreaking new study that offers an unflinching, data-driven look at the emotional, economic, and cultural pressures facing American men.

At a time when narratives around masculinity are increasingly divisive and distorted, their annual study cuts through the noise with a clear, compassionate message: Men are not in crisis because of who they are — they’re in crisis because of what they lack.

Perhaps that is a driver behind their finding, an absolutely terrifying statistic that 57% of men, and 52% of women, believe that the US would be a better place with a strong leader in charge who doesn’t bother with elections. The stakes of what is occurring in our country right now couldn’t be any higher.

Link to research: https://www.equimundo.org/resources/state-of-american-men-2025/

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Welcome to the Modern Husbands podcast, where any combination of Dr. Bruce Ross, Christian Sherrill, and Brian Page host national experts who share winning ideas to manage money and the home as a team.

I’m Brian Page, founder of Modern Husbands. Sometimes our listeners want more support than a podcast can give, individual or couple support, which I now provide. Details can be found at modernhusbands.com or you can email me at brian@modernhusbands.com.

For today’s podcast we welcome Dr. Allison Daminger, an assistant professor of sociology at UW-Madison and the author of What's on Her Mind: The Mental Workload of Family Life, forthcoming in September 2025. Daminger's research is focused on how and why gender shapes family dynamics, particularly the division of work and power in couples. Her award-winning scholarship has been featured in outlets including The Atlantic, The New York Times, and Psychology Today. Daminger also writes a weekly newsletter, The Daminger Dispatch, about the intersections between gender and family life.

Today’s discussion is laser focused on the mental load and what’s on the mind of working women. Enjoy the show.

Show Notes

01:00 Introduction
01:55 Let’s start with the basics. What exactly is “cognitive labor,” and how is it different from other types of household labor?
05:02 You break down cognitive labor into four tasks: anticipating, identifying, deciding, and monitoring. Can you walk us through what those look like in everyday family life?
16:28 One of your findings is that even in households that believe in equality, women tend to carry more of the mental load. Why is that, and how does it persist even with good intentions?
25:36 How do early childhood experiences shape the way men and women learn (or don’t learn) to do cognitive labor?
28:44 Your research includes same-gender couples. What lessons can different-gender couples learn from how cognitive labor is handled in those relationships?
32:11 Let’s talk about solutions. What can couples do if they want to move toward a more equitable distribution of cognitive labor? Where should they start?
38:14 You write that many men want to help but feel unsure about how to jump in. What advice do you have for those men to begin showing up better?
43:21 In the book, you describe how unequal cognitive labor can impact a woman’s identity, stress levels, and even career. Can you share a story or example that really stuck with you?
45:32 Where can our listeners learn more about you and purchase your book?
46:03 What is one piece of simple and actionable advice you want to leave our listeners with?

Click here to learn more about Dr. Daminger and buy her book.

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In this episode of the Modern Husbands podcast, Brian Page, Ashley Brichter, and Kate Mangino discuss the importance of household equality and the challenges couples face in achieving it. They explore the benefits of domestic equity for both men and women, emphasizing the need for emotional connections and breaking down traditional gender norms.

Dr. Kate Mangino is the author of Equal Partners: Improving Gender Equality at Home, focuses on the benefits for men who live in a gender equitable way. Kate focuses on addressing social norms for attitude and behavior change.

Ashley Brichter is the Founder and CEO of Birthsmarter, a wildly successful education program for married couples. Ashley is a life-long educator, birth worker, consultant, Certified Fair Play Facilitator and entrepreneur.

The conversation introduces the MOVE framework (Money, Operations, Values, and Empathy) as a tool for couples to navigate their relationships and financial discussions effectively. The hosts share practical strategies for improving communication and managing household responsibilities, ultimately highlighting the value of investing in relationships and adapting to change together.

Show Notes

00:00 Introduction to Modern Husbands Podcast
03:56 Understanding Gender Norms and Their Impact
06:36 Benefits of Household Equity for Men
09:23 The MOVE Framework: Money, Operations, Values, Empathy
14:16 Navigating Money Conversations in Relationships
22:12 Practical Steps for Couples to Improve Communication
29:55 Final Thoughts and Resources for Couples

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Welcome to the Modern Husbands podcast, where any combination of Dr. Bruce Ross, Christian Sherrill, and Brian Page host national experts who share winning ideas to manage money and the home as a team.

I’m Brian Page, founder of Modern Husbands. Sometimes our listeners want more support than a podcast can give, individual or couple support, which I now provide. Details can be found at modernhusbands.com or you can email me at brian@modernhusbands.com.

For today’s podcast we welcome Dr. Ax Abdullah is a war refugee turned Ph.D. in Human-Computer Interaction. Ax is the founder and the CEO of 3rd Brain, a company he founded with his wife and co-founder, Paige. Together, they are creating an application that addresses the mental load we all experience managing home and the life as busy dual career couples.

You’re going to love his story and today’s great conversation about the mental load. Enjoy the show.

Subscribe or follow Modern Husbands on social media!

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Welcome to the Modern Husbands podcast, where any combination of Dr. Bruce Ross, Christian Sherrill, and Brian Page host national experts who share winning ideas to manage money and the home as a team.

I’m Brian Page, founder of Modern Husbands. Sometimes our listeners want more support than a podcast can give, individual or couple support, which I now provide. Details can be found at modernhusbands.com or you can email me at brian@modernhusbands.com.

For today’s podcast we welcome Otto Rivera, a Certified Financial Planner® and an Enrolled Agent with the IRS who was diagnosed with ADHD in his 40s. Otto is a member of the Financial Planning Association and is the host of their national Neurodivergent Planners Knowledge Circle in which neurodivergent financial planners and other advisors share insights and education about neurodiversity.

Today’s episode is focused on how neurodivergent couples can manage their finances. Enjoy the show!

Listener Notes

00:00 Introduction
01:16 Can you explain what it means to be neurodivergent?
03:08 Can you share with our audience why you became passionate about helping neurodivergent folks with money management and financial planning?
05:02 Could you explain how neurodivergence can affect an individual's ability to manage finances?
10:45 For a neurodivergent individual looking to start managing their finances, what initial steps would you recommend?
14:10 What role can spouses play in assisting neurodivergent individuals with their financial planning?
17:01 Can you discuss any budgeting techniques that are particularly effective for those who are neurodivergent?
20:23 Why is it more effective to split your deposit?
25:27 What is one simple piece of actionable advice you want to leave our listeners with on the topic?

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