This week, Trump dodges the crypt and rakes in the crypto. Congress comes down with a bad case of RFK Jr., and the Epstein survivors have Jeffrey’s old pals in a cold sweat. A die-hard Latino MAGA voter (Oscar Nuñez) stops by to explain why, despite all evidence, sí Trump puede. Oscar and Alex Borstein go on the record to guess all the news that’s fit to print. And then we crack open the Egg of Truth and have ourselves one shell of a time.

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Trump puts the “dick” in dictator, Pete Hegseth takes D.C. to the gun show, and RFK Jr. weighs in on America’s mitochondria. CDC? How about he sees deez nuts?! Martha Plimpton takes Lovett to Task over her IMDB, while Siri Dahl and Jamie Loftus search through America’s freakiest porn terms. Lovett finally learns what sex is, and we finally send our most hated wedding trends back down the aisle where they belong.

Get tickets to LOLI NYC & more upcoming shows at Crooked.com/events

Get tickets to CROOKED CON November 6-7 in Washington, D.C at crookedcon.com

For a closed-captioned version of this episode, click here. For a transcript of this episode, please email transcripts@crooked.com and include the name of the podcast.

An all timer of an episode! We've got Andor creator Tony Gilroy on how empires fall and why Pedro Pascal is lugging a cello around. Then Severance’s Patricia Arquette and Adam Scott on their innies, outies, and ups and downs in Hollywood. Plus all the week's news on foreign visits, woke logos, and bored troops.

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Donald Trump calls up the National Guard to avenge Big Balls, Pam Bondi furtively Googles “how to lead police department,” and D.C. residents finally feel safe on the cobblestone streets of Georgetown. Los Angeles Mayor Karen Bass stops by to call bullshit on the Trump administration. Tom Papa and Ron Funches join us to choke down the week’s news with a side of mayonnaise, then it’s time to spin the Rant Wheel into gold.

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This week, the White House hosts its first annual Epstein Cover-Up Dinner, Trump feels the Labor pains, and Texas Democrats leave the Lone Star State even more lonely. Jeopardy’s Ken Jennings and Amy Schneider stop by to answer our questions and question our answers, while Tim Heidecker and Vanessa Gonzalez hallucinate an LLM (Large Laugh Model). And we leave the stage sizzling with our Hot Takes about Texas, Jeopardy, and the Riyadh Comedy Festival.

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Get tickets to CROOKED CON November 6-7 in Washington, D.C at crookedcon.com

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Epstein haunts the White House, Trump huffs on a burn bag, and Ghislaine Maxwell hunts a pardon. Patton Oswalt and Peppermint make a stop for some summer news slop, while Alice Wetterlund and Ashley Nicole Black let us speak freely. And we close out our evening with a turn of the Rant Wheel.

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Border? I hardly knew her! Join us as Lovett or Leave It journeys to the Great White North, where the kisses are French and the bacon ham, for Montreal’s Just For Laughs Festival. This week, Donald Trump’s friendship with Jeffrey Epstein sketches us out, Mike Johnson shutters the House early to stop the release of the Epstein Files, and the DOJ hops on a plane for Ghislaine. Meanwhile, Zach Zucker stops by for some stage time; Roy Wood Jr. and Gianmarco Soresi talk late night and the good fight, and Cat Cohen and Mary Beth Barone get a little cozy with Canucks. And we end the evening with a spin of the American apology wheel, taking us all out in a blaze of sorry.

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In honor of our independence and courtesy of our beloved Friends of the Pod, we present some of the best rants from guests who went off louder than a firework ever could. Lettuce between cheese and meat. Turning 40 with drunken grace. Edging superheroes. It’s all here, so sit back, crack open a cold one, and drink in the sweet, unhinged musings of Luenell, Vanessa Bayer, TS Madison, Ms. Pat, Mitra Jouhari, and the golden boy himself. And while you’re sitting there reminiscing with rants of yore, remember… this is why our forefathers fought. This… is America.

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For a closed-captioned version of this episode, click here. For a transcript of this episode, please email transcripts@crooked.com and include the name of the podcast.