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You Play the Girl
- On Playboy Bunnies, Stepford Wives, Train Wrecks, & Other Mixed Messages
- Narrated by: Amy McFadden
- Length: 9 hrs and 32 mins
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Publisher's Summary
WINNER OF THE NATIONAL BOOK CRITICS CIRCLE AWARD FOR CRITICISM
A FINALIST FOR THE PEN/DIAMONSTEIN-SPIELVOGEL AWARD FOR THE ART OF THE ESSAY
"If Hollywood's treatment of women leaves you wanting, you'll find good, heady company in You Play the Girl." --ELLE
As a kid in the 1970s and 80s, Carina Chocano was confused by the mixed messages all around her; messages that told her who she could be - and who she couldn’t. Dutifully absorbing all the conflicting information the culture has to offer on how to be a woman, Chocano grappled with sexed up sidekicks, princesses waiting to be saved, and morally infallible angels who seemed to have no opinions of their own. She learned that "the girl" is not a person, but a man's idea of what a woman should be - she’s whatever the hero needs her to be in order to become himself. It wasn't until she spent five years as a movie critic, and was laid off just after her daughter was born, however, that she really came to understand how the stories the culture tells us about what it means to be a girl limit our lives and shape our destinies. She resolved to rewrite her own story.
In You Play the Girl, Chocano blends formative personal stories with insightful and emotionally powerful analysis. Moving from Bugs Bunny to Playboy Bunnies, from Flashdance to Frozen, from the progressive ’70s through the backlash ’80s, the glib ’90s, and the pornified aughts - and at stops in between - she explains how growing up in the shadow of “the girl” taught her to think about herself and the world and what it means to raise a daughter in the face of these contorted reflections. In the tradition of Roxane Gay, Rebecca Solnit, and Susan Sontag, Chocano brilliantly shows that our identities are more fluid than we think, and certainly more complex than anything we see on any kind of screen.
Produced by special arrangement with Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Publishing Company. “The Ingenue Chooses Marriage or Death,” “Bad Girlfriend,” “The Kick- Ass,” “Surreal Housewives,” “Celebrity Gothic,” “A Modest Proposal for More Backstabbing in Preschool,” and “Girls Love Math” first appeared in a different form in the New York Times Magazine. Portions of “Real Girls” and “Big Mouth Strikes Again” appeared in the Los Angeles Times, and a different version of “Thoroughly Modern Lily” was first published in Salon. The author is grateful for permission to reprint lines from “Miley Cyrus Is Just Trying to Save the World” by Allison Glock (2015), courtesy of Marie Claire, Hearst Communications, Inc.
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Average Customer RatingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Adam
- 10-12-22
The Audience Doesn’t Matter
The tone of this book is bizarre. Carina isn’t trying to persuade. There is no show and tell. She might as well be talking to herself, marveling at her own vocabulary. There is no point and counterpoint of authentic versus inauthentic femininity and how lopsided the portrayal is across literature, film, and television. Instead it’s an endless parade of “this is bad and this is bad…” chapter after chapter, hour after hour. And her writing shows no interest in us, the reader or listener. The narrator does her best with what’s here, which was quite a feat. Good job, Amy.
We would like to learn, to be persuaded, and to have examples ready if someone were to ask about the topic. My Women in Film teacher engaged me in a spirited discussion over Ridley being a true action hero or merely gaining power as a surrogate mother for Newt. It was fun. This book wasn’t. Prepare yourself for a Goth equivalent of life being terrible in all aspects, particularly for women, real and fictional.
Last dig - I came for the Stepford Wives. The horror of your trusted loved one trading the real you for an artificial and idealized version is incredible. Not so for Carina. In so many words, she indicates second-wave feminists dismissed it and so will she. And yet, she did not feel so above it slip it into her title. She tricked a credit out of me. I hope I can save you this fate.
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By: Sheila Weller
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Passages
- Predictable Crises of Adult Life
- By: Gail Sheehy
- Narrated by: Carrington MacDuffie, Gail Sheehy
- Length: 17 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Gail Sheehy’s classic bestseller, Passages: Predictable Crises of Adult Life, is available with a new introduction. For decades, Passages has been inspiring audiences to see the predictable crises of adult life as opportunities for growth. She charts the stages between 18 and 50 as unfolding in a pattern of adult development: once recognized, more easily managed.
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A mirror for aspiring grown-ups.
- By Mikey on 10-26-20
By: Gail Sheehy
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White
- By: Bret Easton Ellis
- Narrated by: Bret Easton Ellis
- Length: 6 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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White is Bret Easton Ellis's first work of nonfiction. Already the bad boy of American literature, from Less Than Zero to American Psycho, Ellis has also earned the wrath of right-thinking people everywhere with his provocations on social media, and here he escalates. Eschewing convention, he embraces views that will make many in literary and media communities cringe, as he takes aim at anti-Trump fixation, coastal elites, corporate censorship, Hollywood, identity politics, Generation Wuss, "woke" cultural watchdogs, and more.
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A Fantastic Listen
- By Keith on 04-18-19
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Feminism and Pop Culture
- Seal Studies
- By: Andi Zeisler
- Narrated by: Angela Reed
- Length: 6 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Whether or not we like to admit it, pop culture is a lens through which we alternately view and shape the world around us. When it comes to feminism, pop culture aids us in translating feminist philosophies, issues, and concepts into everyday language, making them relevant and relatable. In Feminism and Pop Culture, author and cofounder of Bitch magazine Andi Zeisler traces the impact of feminism on pop culture (and vice versa) from the 1940s to the present and beyond.
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Really needs an update
- By Lori Grossman on 04-05-18
By: Andi Zeisler
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Yeah, No. Not Happening.
- How I Found Happiness Swearing Off Self-Improvement and Saying F*ck It All - and How You Can Too
- By: Karen Karbo
- Narrated by: Karen Karbo
- Length: 6 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Why are we so obsessed with being our so-called best selves? Because our modern culture force feeds women lies designed to heighten their insecurities: "You can do it all - crush it at work, at home, in the bedroom, at PTA, and at Pilates - and because you can, you should. We can show you how!" Karen Karbo has had enough. She’s taking a stand against the cultural and societal pressures, marketing, and media influences that push us to spend endless time, energy, and money trying to "fix" ourselves.
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say yes! to this book!
- By Darcy Arwen Leigh on 05-01-23
By: Karen Karbo
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My Life as a Goddess
- A Memoir through (Un)Popular Culture
- By: Guy Branum, Mindy Kaling - foreword
- Narrated by: Guy Branum, Mindy Kaling - foreword
- Length: 9 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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From a young age, Guy Branum always felt as if he were on the outside looking in. Self-taught, introspective, and from a boring farm town, he couldn’t relate to his neighbors. While other boys played outside, he stayed indoors reading Greek mythology. And being gay and overweight, he got used to diminishing himself. But little by little, he started learning from all the strange, lonely outcasts in history, and he started to feel hope. In this collection of personal essays, Guy talks about finding a sense of belonging at Berkeley, being typecast as the “Sassy Gay Friend”, and more....
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Perfect
- By JayJay on 07-31-18
By: Guy Branum, and others
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A Better Man
- A (Mostly Serious) Letter to My Son
- By: Michael Ian Black
- Narrated by: Michael Ian Black
- Length: 5 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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In this thoughtful, inspiring, and deeply personal book, comedian, actor, and father Michael Ian Black gets (mostly) serious about the trouble with masculinity. In the form of a heartfelt letter to his college-bound son - but with ideas sure to resonate for many parents - he reveals his own complicated relationship with his father, explores the damage caused by the expectations placed on boys to “man up”, and searches for the best way to help his son be part of the solution, not the problem, in a world in which the word masculinity now goes hand in hand with “toxic".
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Thank you
- By Ryan on 12-09-22
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Sex and Lies
- True Stories of Women's Intimate Lives in the Arab World
- By: Sophie Lewis, LeĂŻla Slimani
- Narrated by: Sarah Agha
- Length: 4 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Leila Slimani was in her native Morocco promoting her novel Adèle, about a woman addicted to sex, when she began meeting women who confided the dark secrets of their sexual lives. In Morocco, adultery, abortion, homosexuality, prostitution, and sex outside of marriage are all punishable by law, and women have only two choices: They can be wives or virgins. Sex and Lies combines vivid, often harrowing testimonies with Slimani's passionate and intelligent commentary to make a galvanizing case for a sexual revolution in the Arab world.Â
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slay
- By Sydney on 05-22-23
By: Sophie Lewis, and others
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Possessed
- The Life of Joan Crawford
- By: Donald Spoto
- Narrated by: Christina Delaine
- Length: 12 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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New York Times best-selling author Donald Spoto has brilliantly explored the lives and careers of numerous Hollywood stars and entertainment icons. In Possessed, his subject is the inimitable Joan Crawford, one of the most electrifying divas of the Golden Age of American film. A more thorough, revealing, and sympathetic portrait of the often maligned movie star - most notably lambasted, perhaps, in the scandalous best seller, Mommie Dearest - Possessed is a fascinating study of the real Joan Crawford, a remarkable actress, businesswoman, mother, and lover.
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Waste of money
- By bkw74 on 07-19-21
By: Donald Spoto
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Women and Other Monsters
- Building a New Mythology
- By: Jess Zimmerman
- Narrated by: Vanessa Moyen
- Length: 6 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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The folklore that has shaped our dominant culture teems with frightening female creatures. In our language, in our stories (many written by men), we underline the idea that women who step out of bounds - who are angry or greedy or ambitious, who are overtly sexual or not sexy enough - aren’t just outside the norm. They’re unnatural. Monstrous. But maybe, the traits we’ve been told make us dangerous and undesirable are actually our greatest strengths.
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Not what I was expecting
- By Mara on 05-03-21
By: Jess Zimmerman
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Saving Cinderella: What Feminists Get Wrong About Disney Princesses and How to Set It Right
- By: Faith Moore
- Narrated by: Faith Moore
- Length: 7 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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It’s time to save Cinderella! Ready for a radical statement? Disney princesses aren’t anti-feminist. Until the 1990s, Disney princesses were role models for little girls, teaching them how to grow up into strong, centered, moral women. But then something terrible happened. A vocal minority of viewers and film critics (let’s call them “princess critics”) got hold of the narrative. They called Disney princesses “drips”, said they were “boring”, and boiled their dreams down to “husband hunting”.
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Thank you!
- By mimistyles916 on 02-23-20
By: Faith Moore
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Boys Will Be Boys
- By: Clementine Ford
- Narrated by: Clementine Ford
- Length: 10 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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How does a feminist raise a son in a world that conditions boys into entitlement, privilege and power at the expense not just of girls' humanity but also their own? All boys start innocent, but by the time they are adolescents many of them will subscribe to a view of masculinity that is openly contemptuous of women and girls. This explosive new work will look at toxic masculinity and the closed ranks of brotherhood that shape an entitled, disrespectful and potentially dangerous idea of manhood.Â
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Visceral and necessary
- By Kindle Customer on 02-17-19
By: Clementine Ford
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The Contender
- The Story of Marlon Brando
- By: William J. Mann
- Narrated by: Will Damron
- Length: 21 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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The award-winning film biographer presents a deeply-textured, ambitious, and definitive portrait of the greatest movie actor of the 20th century, the elusive Marlon Brando, bringing his extraordinarily complex life into view as never before. The most influential movie actor of his era, Marlon Brando changed the way other actors perceived their craft. His approach was natural, honest, and deeply personal, resulting in performances - most notably in A Streetcar Named Desire and On the Waterfront - that are without parallel.
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Psychobabble run amok
- By Dr. Susan Tice-Alicke on 06-07-20
By: William J. Mann
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He's a Stud, She's a Slut, and 49 Other Double Standards Every Woman Should Know
- By: Jessica Valenti
- Narrated by: Julie McKay
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Double standards are nothing new. Women deal with them every day. Take the common truism that women who sleep around are sluts while men are studs. Why is it that men grow distinguished and sexily gray as they age while women just get saggy and haggard? Have you ever wondered how a young woman is supposed to both virginal and provocatively enticing at the same time?
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Very interesting
- By Katherine on 01-29-15
By: Jessica Valenti
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Tied Up in Knots
- How Getting What They Wanted Has Made Women Miserable
- By: Andrea Tantaros
- Narrated by: Andrea Tantaros
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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In this shocking, funny, and bluntly honest tour of today's gender discontents, Andrea Tantaros, one of Fox News' most popular and outspoken stars, exposes how the rightful feminist pursuit of equality went too far, and how the unintended pitfalls of that power trade have made women (and men!) miserable.
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Not What I Thought It Would Be
- By Kevin on 05-06-16
By: Andrea Tantaros