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You Are Your Own
- A Reckoning with the Religious Trauma of Evangelical Christianity
- Narrated by: Jamie Lee Finch
- Length: 3 hrs and 22 mins
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Publisher's Summary
Rooted in her experiences growing up in an evangelical Christian family, Jamie Lee Finch’s You Are Your Own offers an overview of evangelicalism and the painful confusion and anxiety experienced under its demands.
Finch explores the mechanisms of trauma and how fundamentalist denominations match the patterns connected with PTSD. She elaborates on the doubt, guilt, fear, and grief that haunt those leaving the evangelical faith and offers an approach to help them recover healthy self-worth and resilience.
A socio-historical autobiographical analysis of evangelical Christianity's religious trauma, You Are Your Own emerges from Finch's reconnaissance on her own life - her journals, stories, trauma - and offers advocacy for everyone harmed by fundamentalist faith.
Jamie Lee Finch is a sexuality and embodiment coach, intuitive healer, self-conversation facilitator, sex witch, and poet. You can learn about Jamie’s work at JamieLeeFinch.com
What listeners say about You Are Your Own
Average Customer RatingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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Story
- Corey Moore
- 11-19-19
great content.
content is great. I'd suggest a physical copy of the book over the audio.
4 people found this helpful
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- Theodore
- 06-24-21
Could have been better
I really like Jamie Lee Finch and the work that she does. I've listened to many podcasts she has been on and read some of her poetry. This book was good, but I suppose I was expecting it to be a breakthrough. It was a lot of what I have heard elsewhere from other people, and it seemed less personal and more conceptual.
The reading was almost unbearable. I like when writers read their own books because you get a lot of the emotion and emphasis you don't get when someone other than the author reads them. There wasn't any of that in this recording. It sounded like she was reading an essay that she had never seen nor wanted to read.
Still worth reading in my opinion, but not as good as I'd hoped.
2 people found this helpful
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- Annika
- 10-16-19
Puts words to unspeakable experiences
I grew up Evangelical. I didn't suffer any overt abuses in my 25 years in the church. But even years later, I am still unearthing problems I can trace back to those core beliefs. Jamie Lee Finch's work gives context to my experience, offers terms and explanations to its many effects, and - most importantly - she shows me I'm not alone.
[I also highly recommend listening to her podcast appearances to hear her in a less formal setting]
2 people found this helpful
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- Shipto Mydoor
- 05-20-20
Insightful and vulnerable
Jamie Lee spends the early part of this book accounting her experiences which set a mirror for the reader to gaze into and draw parallels from. I feel that every American at least should read or listen to her journey. I can not recommend it enough for how this book has helped our family.
1 person found this helpful
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- Heather
- 04-11-20
A very lovely and vulnerable exploration of the ways in which faith can be used to harm others.
I picked up this audio book after Jamie was on the Good Christian Fun podcast and I am so glad I found it.
I grew up Catholic. And while my family may not have been especially devoted or evangelical about our faith, it had meant a lot to me for many years. I was lucky enough to be in an environment where most people were very encouraging about how God was loving and did not emphasize any angry and faithful sky father who got upset easily. (Even if I did end up with the Catholic guilt complex)
However, some people I knew personally were not so lucky. I sometimes brushed with that angry, controlling God in how they interacted with the world or in how their family dynamics played out. Where questioning something meant questioning God's divinity and righteousness and that could not be allowed.
I also remember how they tried to pull others in an attempt to "save" them. Including me. The anxiety induced by their faith was contagious and sometimes I was afraid like they were over how I worshipped and how I would be going to hell.
Jamie does an excellent job laying out this experience as someone who lived this life first hand.
Her story resonates as it describes how some retreat into faith to find love and community that they are not receiving elsewhere, specifically those who may be experiencing other sources of trauma like abuse. She also makes it clear that some of these churches can keep this cycle going.
She writes beautifully and the audio brings that out. It is a definite recommendation from me to those who are trying to cope with trauma and the role in which faith may play in that trauma.
1 person found this helpful
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- Matthew Grauberger
- 11-13-19
Groundbreaking
Jamie’s work is groundbreaking. This work could not be more timely. Her reading of the text is soothing and calm. The opposite of typical dialogue around this subject matter. Jamie names Evangelical Christianity for what it is while simultaneously creating a space for the reader to listen to their body, come to a deeper understanding of what their body is saying, and to then act autonomous from the authoritarian structures that have ruled over the wonder and goodness of the human experience for so long. Jamie’s work is a paradigm shift. To Jamie and those involved in this work. Thank you.
1 person found this helpful
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- Angela B.
- 04-29-23
perfect
loved it. it was quick and informative. just what I needed at this moment
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- Kindle Customer
- 02-05-23
❤❤❤❤
Epic !!! Such a very needed book !!!
I just finished listening to it,
and I already cannot wait to listen to it again !!!
Jamie, you did such an awesome job of reading
your book to us ... granting dignity and respect to such an intense and sensitive topic . Not an easy task ....
Thank you !! 🌹~Judith Stauffer
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- EKelly
- 12-28-22
A Must Read For Anyone Who Grew Up Like Me
I have been looking for something that really connects with me and understands what I can’t. This book was an eye-opener. Her story was told in such a way that made me finally identify with the things holding me back. She’s gentle, yet straightforward, and she clearly surrounds her arguments with supporting context that solidified the validity of her story. I highly recommend for anyone who grew up in a strict religious household; especially if you grew up Evangelical/Fundamentalist Christian.
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- L
- 11-20-22
Outstanding, pertinent, invaluable
Music to my ears, exceedingly validating — Loved it, listened on audible, but will also buy the paperback. Highly recommending to anyone who has suffered from the installation of false & toxic evangelical teachings.
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- Anonymous User
- 05-10-21
Close to home
If you grew up in the evangelical church this book is for you. It shook me. Also the authors voice is easy and relaxing to listen to
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- Memoir of a Prayerful Jezebel
- By: Brenda Marie Davies
- Narrated by: Brenda Marie Davies
- Length: 7 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Going to a conservative Christian church when she was young, Brenda Marie Davies heard a consistent message - save yourself for marriage - that instilled in her fear and shame about sex. On Her Knees chronicles Brenda’s spiritual journey over the course of a decade in LA through marriage, divorce, unlikely friendship, and sexual exploration. Through it all, she began tearing down the false idol of purity while refusing to abandon her faith. This is a story for anyone who wonders if it’s possible to love God without fearing sex, in all its shades of grey.
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This book is PHENOMENAL
- By Amazon Customer on 04-22-21
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Faith Unraveled
- How a Girl Who Knew All the Answers Learned to Ask Questions
- By: Rachel Held Evans, Sarah Bessey
- Narrated by: Rachel Held Evans
- Length: 4 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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From New York Times best-selling author Rachel Held Evans: a must-listen for anyone on the journey of doubt, deconstruction, and ultimately faith reborn. Eighty years after the Scopes Monkey Trial made a spectacle of Christian fundamentalism and brought national attention to her hometown, Rachel Held Evans faced a trial of her own when she began to have doubts about her faith. Rachel recounts growing up in a culture obsessed with apologetics, struggling as her own faith unraveled one unexpected question at a time.
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Recharging my faith
- By nitasue11 on 09-07-20
By: Rachel Held Evans, and others
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Pure
- Inside the Evangelical Movement That Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free
- By: Linda Kay Klein
- Narrated by: Linda Kay Klein
- Length: 8 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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In the 1990s, a “purity industry” emerged out of the white evangelical Christian culture. Purity rings, purity pledges, and purity balls came with a dangerous message: girls are potential sexual “stumbling blocks” for boys and men, and any expression of a girl’s sexuality could reflect the corruption of her character. This message traumatized many girls - resulting in anxiety, fear, and experiences that mimicked the symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder - and trapped them in a cycle of shame.
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I expected a different ending I suppose
- By Military Dad on 12-12-18
By: Linda Kay Klein
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#ChurchToo
- How Purity Culture Upholds Abuse and How to Find Healing
- By: Emily Joy Allison, Lyz Lenz - foreword
- Narrated by: Emily Ellet
- Length: 7 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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While patriarchy and misogyny are problems everywhere, they take on a particularly pernicious form in Christian churches, where those with power have been insisting, since many decades before #MeToo, that this sexually dysfunctional environment is, in fact, exactly how God wants it to be. #ChurchToo turns over the rocks of the church's sexual dysfunction, revealing just what makes sexualized violence in religious contexts both ubiquitous and uniquely traumatizing.
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Less convincing than I expected
- By michael miller on 10-06-22
By: Emily Joy Allison, and others
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Religious Refugees
- (De)Constructing Toward Spiritual and Emotional Healing
- By: Mark Gregory Karris
- Narrated by: Joseph Earl Johnson
- Length: 10 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Questioning our faith and spiritual beliefs, while leaving the familiarity of our religious homeland, can be excruciatingly painful. Loneliness, isolation, and fear of rejection - from God and others - can give rise to shame, guilt, anger, and sadness. In Religious Refugees, therapist and ordained pastor Mark Karris explores this disorienting faith shift through the lens of cutting-edge psychological research, theology, philosophy, and, most importantly, the real world experiences of those who are going through - and have gone through - this arduous and confusing journey.
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Worth the read
- By OCONNOR on 06-23-21
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After Evangelicalism
- The Path to a New Christianity
- By: David P. Gushee
- Narrated by: Adam Verner
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Millions are getting lost in the evangelical maze: inerrancy, indifference to the environment, deterministic Calvinism, purity culture, racism, LGBTQ discrimination, male dominance, and Christian nationalism. They are now conscientious objectors, deconstructionists, perhaps even "none and done". As one of America's leading academics speaking to the issues of religion today, David Gushee offers a clear assessment and a new way forward for disillusioned post-evangelicals.
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Love the message. Pushed through the narration.
- By Kenny Bishop on 06-21-21
By: David P. Gushee
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On Her Knees
- Memoir of a Prayerful Jezebel
- By: Brenda Marie Davies
- Narrated by: Brenda Marie Davies
- Length: 7 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Going to a conservative Christian church when she was young, Brenda Marie Davies heard a consistent message - save yourself for marriage - that instilled in her fear and shame about sex. On Her Knees chronicles Brenda’s spiritual journey over the course of a decade in LA through marriage, divorce, unlikely friendship, and sexual exploration. Through it all, she began tearing down the false idol of purity while refusing to abandon her faith. This is a story for anyone who wonders if it’s possible to love God without fearing sex, in all its shades of grey.
-
-
This book is PHENOMENAL
- By Amazon Customer on 04-22-21
-
Faith Unraveled
- How a Girl Who Knew All the Answers Learned to Ask Questions
- By: Rachel Held Evans, Sarah Bessey
- Narrated by: Rachel Held Evans
- Length: 4 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
From New York Times best-selling author Rachel Held Evans: a must-listen for anyone on the journey of doubt, deconstruction, and ultimately faith reborn. Eighty years after the Scopes Monkey Trial made a spectacle of Christian fundamentalism and brought national attention to her hometown, Rachel Held Evans faced a trial of her own when she began to have doubts about her faith. Rachel recounts growing up in a culture obsessed with apologetics, struggling as her own faith unraveled one unexpected question at a time.
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Recharging my faith
- By nitasue11 on 09-07-20
By: Rachel Held Evans, and others
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Sex, God, and the Conservative Church
- Erasing Shame from Sexual Intimacy
- By: Tina Schermer Sellers
- Narrated by: Tina Schermer Sellers
- Length: 9 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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As a psychotherapist and professor of marriage and family therapy and sexuality at a Christian University, Tina Schermer Sellers, PhD, has spent a career listening deeply to the often untold, most tightly held, shame-filled stories of people’s lives. Over the last 30 years in particular, these stories have revealed the devastating effects of abstinence education, the purity movement of the evangelical church, and the simultaneous removal of media regulations that allowed for an influx of sexual violence against women to enter all forms of commercial media beginning in the 1980s.
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Read this if you have ever wondered if you are alo
- By Hello there. on 03-21-23
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Jesus and John Wayne
- How White Evangelicals Corrupted a Faith and Fractured a Nation
- By: Kristin Kobes du Mez
- Narrated by: Suzie Althens
- Length: 12 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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How did a libertine who lacks even the most basic knowledge of the Christian faith win 81 percent of the white evangelical vote in 2016? And why have white evangelicals become a presidential reprobate's staunchest supporters? Jesus and John Wayne is a sweeping account of the last 75 years of white evangelicalism, showing how American evangelicals have worked for decades to replace the Jesus of the Gospels with an idol of rugged masculinity and Christian nationalism.
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Like reading a history of my evangelical life
- By Renee on 10-15-20
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A Voice from Inside
- Notes on Religious Trauma in a Captive Organization
- By: Geoffrey Wallis
- Narrated by: KC Dalbey
- Length: 5 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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What is it like to suffer Religious Trauma Syndrome while still inside a high demand religious organization? What causes Religious Trauma Syndrome, and what are the risks that come with continuing participation? A Voice from Inside presents the rare voice of a critical insider of the Watch Tower Society, offering an account of the experience, how people are struggling, and what can be done to survive and move forward.
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Recently free
- By frank on 10-27-21
By: Geoffrey Wallis
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Beyond Shame
- Creating a Healthy Sex Life on Your Own Terms
- By: Matthias Roberts, Tina Schermer Sellers - foreword
- Narrated by: Timothy Andrés Pabon
- Length: 5 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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We all carry sexual shame. Whether we grew up in the repressive purity culture of American Evangelical Christianity or not, we've all been taught in subtle and not-so-subtle ways that sex (outside of very specific contexts) is immoral and taboo. Psychotherapist Matthias Roberts helps listeners overcome their shame around sex by overcoming three unhealthy coping mechanisms we use to manage that shame.
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Good info, but author is close minded
- By Anonymous User on 04-07-22
By: Matthias Roberts, and others
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The Making of Biblical Womanhood
- How the Subjugation of Women Became Gospel Truth
- By: Beth Allison Barr
- Narrated by: Sarah Zimmerman
- Length: 7 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Biblical womanhood - the belief that God designed women to be submissive wives, virtuous mothers, and joyful homemakers - pervades North American Christianity. From choices about careers to roles in local churches to relationship dynamics, this belief shapes the everyday lives of evangelical women. Yet biblical womanhood isn't biblical, says Baylor University historian Beth Allison Barr. It was born in a series of clearly definable historical moments.
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Fantastic thought provoking book
- By busymom on 04-22-21