The Woman They Wanted

Shattering the Illusion of the Good Christian Wife

De: Shannon Harris

Narrado por: Shannon Harris

As a twenty-three-year-old singer and the soon-to-be wife of youth pastor Joshua Harris, nothing in Shannon Harris's secular upbringing prepared her to enter the world of conservative Christianity. Soon Joshua's bestselling book I Kissed Dating Goodbye helped inspire a national purity movement, and Shannon's identity became "pastor's wife."

The Woman They Wanted recounts Shannon's remarkable experience inside Big Church—where she was asked to live within a narrow definition of womanhood for almost two decades—and her subsequent journey out of that world and into a more authentic version of herself. Entering conservative American Christianity was like being drawn out to sea, she writes, inexorable and all consuming. Slowly, her worldview was narrowed, her motivations questioned, her behavior examined, until she had been whittled down to an idealized version of femininity envisioned as an extension of her husband and the church. However, when Sovereign Grace Ministries fell apart due to leadership conflicts and Shannon found herself outside church circles for the first time in years, she heard her intuition calling to her again. As she began to shake off the fog of depression and confusion, that voice grew louder. In honoring it, she awakened to the realities in which she had been trapped and found her truest self.

©2023 Shannon Harris (P)2023 eChristian

A Must Read

Very clear and thoughtful examination of the trauma from church. Helpful in understanding how one might end up in a life never imagined.

Compelling, personal story

Because I come from a religiously conservative background, I found her story to be very relatable and interesting. It helped me to hear her personal story and the changes she made in her life to come into her own person. I’m glad she shared her story.

Important wake up

Personal story of how an ultra conservative church pidgeon holes and disenfranchises women. rather than protecting peoples faith they push believers to a crisis of faith. Important memoir that answers most of the questions people have about this couple. Minus stars for literary style and reading.

The fruit of truth

Thank you for sharing your story and living courageously. This message needs to be spoken.

Great look into extreme Evangelical Christianity

A riveting and enlightening description of what Shannon encountered in a cult like church. It is a clear warning of many pitfalls one might encounter in the church. Her words resonated so much for me, a deconstructing millenial with religious trauma.

Not biblical

Being a woman minister who has worked hard to obtain and maintain her identity, I had hoped this testimony would provide more biblical theology to support the role of the woman in the church and ministry. Sadly, I find it misrepresents God’s heart because men have misrepresented God. I do believe there is a way to be free from man-made constructs and still embrace the truth of the Word of God. I’m glad she was able to free herself from legalism, but in doing so she also freed herself from Truth. There are some good insights, but I couldn’t agree with some of her theology.

It needed to be written

A necessary read for those of us still reckoning with the woman they wanted us to be. Thank you, Shannon.

Truth spoken

Shannon does a beautiful job of capturing what many of us experienced growing up in a patriarchal church. So grateful the brave are speaking out.

I Couldn’t Put It Down

This is the experience, to some degree or another of many, many women in church. It was extremely relatable.

A nice take on American Evangelism.

This is an ideal read for someone who is starting to question their faith or Evangelical faith community. It’s a safe and balanced book.