The Defining Decade

Why Your Twenties Matter - and How to Make the Most of Them Now

By: Meg Jay

Narrated by: Meg Jay

Length: 7 hrs and 11 mins

Publisher's summary

New York Times best-selling psychologist Dr. Meg Jay uses real stories from real lives to provide smart, compassionate, and constructive advice about the crucial (and difficult) years we cannot afford to miss.

Our "30-is-the-new-20" culture tells us the 20-something years don't matter. Some say they are a second adolescence. Others call them an emerging adulthood. Dr. Meg Jay, a clinical psychologist, argues that 20-somethings have been caught in a swirl of hype and misinformation, much of which has trivialized what is actually the most defining decade of adulthood.

Drawing from almost two decades of work with hundreds of clients and students, The Defining Decade weaves the latest science of the 20-something years with the behind-closed-doors stories from 20-somethings, themselves. The result is a provocative listen that provides the tools necessary to make the most of your 20s, and shows us how work, relationships, personality, social networks, identity, and even the brain can change more during this decade than at any other time in adulthood - if we use the time wisely.

The Defining Decade is a smart, compassionate and constructive book about the years we cannot afford to miss.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2012 Meg Jay (P)2021 Hachette Audio

Really enjoyed this as a parent too.

I really appreciate this book. The points brought up by the author were great and my son really enjoyed this book and he gained a lot of confidence about big life decisions and he told me about the book so I read it also. I hope my next 2 kids read it too. Highly recommend.

So motivating! Puts things into perspective

I was assigned this book for a Developmental Psychology course, and it has honestly changed my life. To be honest, I've been thinking about my future career and personal growth from the time I was 17. My friends thought I was uptight and boring, and my parents thought I was too anxious. This book reaffirmed that the choices I make for my life right now are important and I need to take accountability for them. And more importantly, I need to surround myself with people who take accountability for their own choices. The best lesson I've gotten out of this book is that taking accountability = control. Who doesn't want to be in control of their own life?

A Must Read!

So wish I’d had this book in MY twenties! Share it with all the 20-somethings in your life. They will thank you!

wish I could have read this in high school

this book was recommended to me by my therapist, despite my being in my mid 30s. it was a really depressing book on one level, just because it's too late in some ways, but that only affirms the importance of what the author is saying for people who are actually not through their twenties. there were some really good takeaways for me despite my age. I've seen a lot of list of questions for couples to talk about when considering a relationship, but this is definitely the best list of conversations to have with a potential partner that I've ever come upon.

I loved this book so much!

this is the first book I've actually been able to finish for a while and want to listen to again. I loved the stories and the questions it had me ask myself I loved the way she read the story, I could feel her drive in this book. thank you! (:

good book with horrible narration

It's pretty good, and I definitely found a lot of the content relatable. It was very eye-opening. The narration is absolutely TERRIBLE, though. I have no idea why more people haven't mentioned this, but the author reads her own work like she's extremely bored by it lol. It made it the book a lot harder to get through because I could only take her droning on for so long at a time. The other issue I take with this book is it is definitely skewed toward a very specific type of person: a traditional college grad who is having trouble finding their footing. There is not much practical information for disadvantaged young adults or those on a non-traditional path. So it was OK. Glad I read it but probably won't use every bit of advice given.

Eye opening

The examples used in each of the sections were eye opening and brilliant. Enjoyed it! Looking forward to reading more of Meg’s work!

new brain development info

the examples most all resonated, it explains so much about what appear to be motivational dilemmas in this age group that were not as prevalent in our generation

Mind opening

I’m turning 21 soon and was heading in the same direction of some these 20 something year olds. Made me really put my life into perspective.

SPECIFIC Advice (not the cliche stuff)

Wow! I’m so glad I listened to The Defining Decade. This has lots of good, SPECIFIC advice. Not the cliche “follow your dreams” stuff. I’m talking the real advice most people don’t think about. Meg Jay explains why committing to a long term relationship and ditching hookup culture in our 20s matters, and why getting engaged BEFORE moving in with our partner might be a good idea. Best of all, she backs her reasoning with data and statistics. She cites empirical research showing that people who make a few key decisions in their 20s end up far happier than those who don’t. Want to know what those key decisions are? Listen to (or read) The Defining Decade.