Squeeze Me

A Novel

By: Carl Hiaasen

Narrated by: Scott Brick

NEW YORK TIMES BEST SELLER • A hilarious novel of social and political intrigue, set against the glittering backdrop of Florida’s gold coast, from the author of Skinny Dip and Razor Girl

“If you could use some wild escapism right now, Hiaasen is your guy.” —The New York Times

WITH A NEW EPILOGUE

At the height of Palm Beach’s charity ball season, Kiki Pew Fitzsimmons, a prominent member of geriatric high society, suddenly vanishes during a swank gala. Kiki Pew was a founding member of the Potussies, a group of women dedicated to supporting the President, who spends half the year at the “Winter White House” just down the road. Meanwhile, Angie Armstrong, wildlife wrangler extraordinaire, is called to the island to deal with a monster-sized Burmese python that has taken residency in a tree. But the President is focused on the disappearance of Kiki Pew. Never one to miss an opportunity to play to his base, he immediately declares her a victim of rampaging immigrant hordes. This, it turns out, is far from the truth, which now lies in the middle of the road, where a bizarre discovery brings the First Lady’s motorcade to a grinding halt. Irreverent, ingenious, and uproariously entertaining, Squeeze Me perfectly captures the absurdity of our times.

Critic reviews

“Carl Hiaasen remains the undefeated, unscored-upon conscience of Florida, maybe the conscience of the whole country. I laughed and laughed and laughed while I read Squeeze Me – until I remembered, hey, I live in Palm Beach! Oh yeah, spoiler alert – the python did it.” —James Patterson

"By the evidence of the scabrous and unrelentingly hilarious Squeeze Me, the Trump era is truly Carl Hiaasen’s moment . . . Just dive in and have a wonderful time." —Richard Lipez, The Washington Post

"Novelists, like the rest of us, can’t look away from the Trump administration. Unfortunately, they haven’t found much interesting to say about it. Carl Hiaasen’s thriller Squeeze Me is, blessedly, an exception . . . Hiaasen is clear-eyed: He meets the president on his subterranean level . . . Squeeze Me is funny, but as with Hiaasen’s best work, it’s grounded in genuine outrage over the corruption that increasingly defines American political and cultural life. And it turns out there’s no better place to invoke that outrage than the wealthy swamps of Florida." —Alex Shephard, The New Republic

"Pink pearls, pythons and a philandering president add up to a rather unusual Palm Beach social season in Carl Hiaasen’s riotously funny new novel, Squeeze Me . . . [Hiaasen] knows and loves Florida and hates what has been done to it as much as anyone I know of, and those passions shape his razor-sharp satirical fiction." —Colette Bancroft, The Tampa Bay Times


"Squeeze Me is vintage Hiaasen — wry humor, social commentary and satire akin to Jonathan Swift, and all fun." —Oline H. Cogdill, The South Florida Sun-Sentinel

His best work since Razor Girl!

Mr. Hiaasen is back on top with some familiar characters, all the absurdities of Florida and the insanity of the past 4 years under the rule of Orange Julius Caesar. He weaves it all together into an outrageous and laugh-out loud yarn that only he can spin! Well worth the money/credit/time!

Does not disappoint

Right on the money for current political insanity in our conflicted republic.
Lots of unexpected belly laughs and reminders why I avoid Florida.

Hilarious and timely

This story and its fabulous performance will keep you in stitches. It's hilarious and a funny way to look at our recent national challenges even with a few outlandish exaggerations.

Laugh out loud!

A great, funny, timely book from the master observer of Florida’s wild side. This time Hiaasen examines Palm Beach society, including an invasive set of reptiles and the (no less slithery) denizens of the president’s Casa Bellicosa. I am listening for the second time and continue to shout with laughter! This is the humor we need to carry us through these dark days!

Another Fabulous Hiaasen!

Great story with beautifully ironic truths as always. Hope Angie will be back in another story, and delighted to find Skink still alive and kicking.