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Publisher's Summary

Writing from firsthand experience, Allison Bottke identifies the lies that kept her, and ultimately her son, in bondage - and how she overcame them. Additional real-life stories from other parents appear throughout the audio.

A tough-love guide to coping with dysfunctional adult children, Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children will empower families by offering hope and healing through S.A.N.I.T.Y. - a six-step program to help parents regain control in their homes and in their lives.

S = STOP enabling, STOP blaming yourself, and STOP the flow of money
A = Assemble a support group
N = Nip excuses in the bud
I = Implement rules/boundaries
T = Trust your instincts
Y = Yield everything to God

©2008 Allison Gappa Bottke (P)2016 Tantor

Critic Reviews

" Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children is packed full of practical, useable, workable ideas and is a welcome tool for parents of grown children, and parents in pain." (Pam Farrel, author of Men Are Like Waffles)

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

Overall

  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Absolutely Liberating!

This book is a must-have for parents of prodigal sons and daughters. As a parent of two sons who are in different types of prison, I daily release my sons to God. God is helping me to understand that He does not need my help, and when I do intervene, I do more harm than good. This book is just confirmation that I am on the right path in stopping my enabling behavior.

5 of 5 people found this review helpful

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    1 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars

Way too Religious, thinking about returning it.

What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?

I am having a hard time getting through this book. I think it could be very helpful but I didn't realize how religious it is. I can only "give it to God" so many times. I need concrete steps and so far I haven't gotten any. I don't need scripture read and quoted to me. I think this should be sold as a Christian book and there needs to be some kind of warning.

What was most disappointing about Allison Bottke’s story?

Way too Religious

What about Margaret Strom’s performance did you like?

She's fine. I have no issue with her reading

What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

Frustration!

Any additional comments?

If you are not religious and are just looking for concrete help don't bother with this book. I am looking for something else.

5 of 6 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

struggling mom

listened to this book over and over especially on hard days thanks definitely helped me find my joy again

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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Much needed

A great book for a desperate situation. Great advice for putting tough situations into perspective

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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A book that truly helps!

If you have an adult child that is out of control, you must read this book! Thank you, Allison, for writing this for all us "enabling parents"!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Brought hope and peace

Listening to this book was very encouraging bringing hope and a sense of peace as I struggle with my adult son.
I highly recommend this book.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children

The book was very helpful in reminding me that I am not alone and I know that my adult children are not my responsibility. Allowing them to grow and develop in their lives is my job not to enabler them. The less I do the more I can start loving me. Loving me allows me to love others unconditionally and being able to detach with love. Thank you.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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remarkable

A mother's love holds no bounds. i pray no one is an enabler but if you are S.A.N.I.T.Y is hard work with peace as reward

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Listen to more than once

You will get what you each time you listen. Great insight and information with a no nonsense approach.

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    2 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars

so so

This book was ok. Not great, not engaging as I thought it would be. The outcome was predictable.

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  • Brian J.
  • 08-21-18

tough love

some sound advice in this book. will use this for sure. good stuff to try

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    3 out of 5 stars
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  • Amazon Customer
  • 01-03-17

Narrator put me off listening

What did you like best about Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children? What did you like least?

The content of the book was okay, but I found the narrator very off-putting because of poor phrasing, pauses in wrong places, and generally a bit monotonous.