Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children

Six Steps to Hope and Healing for Struggling Parents

By: Allison Bottke

Narrated by: Margaret Strom

Length: 7 hrs and 42 mins

Publisher's summary

Writing from firsthand experience, Allison Bottke identifies the lies that kept her, and ultimately her son, in bondage - and how she overcame them. Additional real-life stories from other parents appear throughout the audio.

A tough-love guide to coping with dysfunctional adult children, Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children will empower families by offering hope and healing through S.A.N.I.T.Y. - a six-step program to help parents regain control in their homes and in their lives.

S = STOP enabling, STOP blaming yourself, and STOP the flow of money
A = Assemble a support group
N = Nip excuses in the bud
I = Implement rules/boundaries
T = Trust your instincts
Y = Yield everything to God

©2008 Allison Gappa Bottke (P)2016 Tantor

Critic reviews

" Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children is packed full of practical, useable, workable ideas and is a welcome tool for parents of grown children, and parents in pain." (Pam Farrel, author of Men Are Like Waffles)

Way too Religious, thinking about returning it.

What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?

I am having a hard time getting through this book. I think it could be very helpful but I didn't realize how religious it is. I can only "give it to God" so many times. I need concrete steps and so far I haven't gotten any. I don't need scripture read and quoted to me. I think this should be sold as a Christian book and there needs to be some kind of warning.

What was most disappointing about Allison Bottke’s story?

Way too Religious

What about Margaret Strom’s performance did you like?

She's fine. I have no issue with her reading

What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

Frustration!

Any additional comments?

If you are not religious and are just looking for concrete help don't bother with this book. I am looking for something else.

Absolutely Liberating!

This book is a must-have for parents of prodigal sons and daughters. As a parent of two sons who are in different types of prison, I daily release my sons to God. God is helping me to understand that He does not need my help, and when I do intervene, I do more harm than good. This book is just confirmation that I am on the right path in stopping my enabling behavior.

Very, Very helpful

if you are an enabler and are having issues with an adult child because of your enabling, this book is a MUST read. I have read several books on this topic and this, by far, is the best book that I have come across. It's captivating and eye-opening. the author writes from experience in dealing with this issue herself so she truly understands. it gives you examples on what you can do, what you need to do in order to break this habit. I have never written a book review but I knew that this book could help so many people. I hope it helps you as it did me! fyi-it does come from a Christian point of view but it's not all that religious for people that don't like that. There is so much anyone can get from this book.

struggling mom

listened to this book over and over especially on hard days thanks definitely helped me find my joy again

Instantly Life Changing

I absolutely loved this book. It was as if I was drinking the "water of life"! I am currently in the midst of similar situations with all three of my sons and now I have some direction. It feels good to know you're not alone and to get good sound and godly advice. This book, besides the Bible, is the best book ever written, in my opinion. The narrator was AWESOME and made and made notable inferences where needed. Amazing to listen to and I am preparing to listen again, making notes this time. I will be sharing with my friends and family. May God bless the author.

Heavy Handed Religious

This book should come with a big warning label:
Super heavy religious theme!
It has so many bible quotes and references to Christianity I felt like I was in church listening to it.
I'm returning it. Too bad as there was some good content in it. It was just too much to bear after even just listening to 7 chapters.

Much needed

A great book for a desperate situation. Great advice for putting tough situations into perspective

A book that truly helps!

If you have an adult child that is out of control, you must read this book! Thank you, Allison, for writing this for all us "enabling parents"!

Brought hope and peace

Listening to this book was very encouraging bringing hope and a sense of peace as I struggle with my adult son.
I highly recommend this book.

Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children

The book was very helpful in reminding me that I am not alone and I know that my adult children are not my responsibility. Allowing them to grow and develop in their lives is my job not to enabler them. The less I do the more I can start loving me. Loving me allows me to love others unconditionally and being able to detach with love. Thank you.

tough love

some sound advice in this book. will use this for sure. good stuff to try

Focus on Christian views

I felt surprised when the book suddenly takes an American Christian PoV, so returned the book. I obviously respect any religion, but I felt this should have been clearer.

Tough love

This is a liberating approach, though one which requires much strength. I will endeavour to start on this journey… we need more on this topic to help with the process of launching our young adults to an empowered life

Preacher heavy

Lots of good advice and guidance but very, very preacher lead. Lots of bible quotes. Sometimes gets a bit too much.

Best book I have listened to. It has spoken to me

Loved it soo much. It has spoken to me personally. Thanks so much. God bless