I'm gonna be honest about what it actually feels like to be placed on a pedestal you never asked to be on, why vulnerability felt like the enemy for most of my life, and what God had to take me through in 2025 to break all of that out of me (and he was not gentle about it).

This is part two so if you haven't watched part one please start there, but in this episode I'm getting into everything I actually learned coming out of that season because there was a lot.

We'll discuss:

• Why not everybody deserves access to your vulnerability even when you're actively working on it
• The difference between people making deposits versus withdrawals when you open up (and how to tell which one is happening)
• What I actually changed about my standards and my relationships to protect myself going forward

If you can relate to this, know that the high achiever conditioning doesn't just stop at your vulnerability, it affects your ability to actually pursue the things you want in life because you're so used to performing. Once you remove that conditioning from your identity, it opens up a world of possibilities you couldn't step into as that performative version of yourself. For coaching to remove the high achiever conditioning from your identity to step into your next level, enroll in the Spring cohort: https://secludedthoughts.com/identity

[Substack] Diary of a High Achiever: https://diaryofahighachiever.substack.com/

If you're the one who always has it together, the one everybody expects to be okay, the one who would genuinely rather deal with it alone than give people the opportunity to disappoint you — this episode is going to feel uncomfortably familiar.

I'm gonna be honest about what it actually feels like to be placed on a pedestal you never asked to be on, why vulnerability felt like the enemy for most of my life, and what God had to take me through in 2025 to break all of that out of me (and he was not gentle about it).

We'll discuss:

• Why I disdain vulnerability & why high achievers specifically, struggle with vulnerability
• The four responses you almost always get when you open up as the strong one (and why they make you want to never do it again)
• What being placed on a pedestal actually costs you and how it quietly conditions you to keep everything to yourself
• What it took for me to finally understand why I was so allergic to vulnerability and what it was really protecting me from

If you can relate to this, know that the high achiever conditioning doesn't just stop at your vulnerability, it affects your ability to actually pursue the things you want in life because you're so used to performing. Once you remove that conditioning from your identity, it opens up a world of possibilities you couldn't step into as that performative version of yourself. For coaching to remove the high achiever conditioning from your identity to step into your next level, enroll in the Spring cohort: https://secludedthoughts.com/identity

[Substack] Diary of a High Achiever: https://diaryofahighachiever.substack.com/

You've been working hard, staying consistent, making sacrifices... and yet just when things finally start working, something in you pulls back. You go quiet, you lose momentum, you forfeit the exact moment you've been working hard for. It makes no sense, and it's been driving you crazy.

This episode is going to explain what is actually happening every time that cycle plays out, (because I promise you it goes way deeper than discipline or how bad you want it), and once you understand it you will never look at it the same way again.

We’ll discuss:

• The REAL reason why you lose momentum the moment things start working in your favor
• Why your hard work and discipline STILL isn't enough unless you get this ONE thing right
• The thing I discovered about myself that finally explained why I kept sabotaging my own breakthroughs
• Practical exercise to do next time this happens so you don't sabotage your opportunity

If this has been happening to you and you’re tired of it, join Become You 2.0 to get the blueprint that will get your nervous system on board with your next level so you stop sabotaging every time things start working out: https://secludedthoughts.com/identity

Journal prompts for high-achievers: https://secludedthoughts.com/doha

Journals prompts to become the best version of yourself: https://secludedthoughts.com/journals