On Earth as It Is on Television

By: Emily Jane

Narrated by: Hayden Bishop

Length: 11 hrs and 25 mins

Publisher's summary

In Emily Jane's rollicking debut, when spaceships arrive and then depart suddenly without a word, the certainty that we are not alone in the universe turns to intense uncertainty as to our place within it.

"Weird and sweet … like a 2020s White Noise: loud and colorful Americana with a sprinkle of apocalyptic doom."—Edgar Cantero

"Heartfelt, witty, and secretly romantic … a delightful and poignant story about what it is to be human, and what we owe each other." —Christina Lauren

Since long before the spaceships' fleeting presence, Blaine has been content to go along with the whims of his supermom wife and half-feral, television-addicted children. But when the kids blithely ponder skinning people to see if they're aliens, and his wife drags them all on a surprise road trip to Disney World, even steady Blaine begins to crack.

Half a continent away, Heather floats in a Malibu pool and watches the massive ships hover overhead. Maybe her life is finally going to start. For her, the arrival heralds a quest to understand herself, her accomplished (and oh-so-annoying) stepfamily, and why she feels so alone in a universe teeming with life.

Suddenly conscious and alert after twenty catatonic years, Oliver struggles to piece together his fragmented, disco-infused memories and make sense of his desire to follow a strange cat on a westward journey.

Embracing the strangeness that is life in the twenty-first century, On Earth as It Is on Television is a rollicking, heartfelt tale of first contact that practically leaps off the planet.

©2023 Emily Jane (P)2023 Hyperion Avenue

An Optimistic Take on Uncertainty and Humanity

I'd found this title on a list of anticipated sci-fi books of the summer. I purchased it right when it came out, something I usually avoid with sci-fi until I read reviews. I'm really happy I did! It was a great, casual listen while I hiked, jogged, or worked outside.

Some things I liked: the first 30% of the book shows the fear and uncertainty that comes with a world-altering event, and the struggle people experience with trying to figure out what it all means and how to find answers. It then switches gears a bit as truths get revealed and turns into a great piece about perspective, seeing beauty in all of life, and what it really means to be human.
The sci-fi aspect of the book was kept uncomplicated, letting the characters and their journeys drive the plot. This made it an easy and enjoyable listen.
The take on cats experiencing the universe on a totally different wavelength is, honestly, the best take on cats I've read so far. Funky little freaks doing Olympic sprints at 4am must be aware of greater universal wisdom, right?
The author captures the feeling of being an excited stranger trying to fit in to a strange land so well. Marveling at every little cultural idiosyncrasy, stuffing yourself full of new food, trying to insert yourself into daily life like a local despite the obvious "outsider" quirks you can't quite shed. And loving every minute of your life you've built despite those differences

Some areas of improvement:
The narrator did a great job with providing so many different voices, though occasionally it was hard to tell a few apart in conversations.
I love cats and dogs alike, but I don't know if non-cat people would feel put off by the constant "hims a chonky boi!" I'd be interested to hear what non-cat people think about it
While the reactions of every day people are spot on (especially Dave and his cult camp of Ohioan alien fighting militia doomsday preppers) it was hard to buy how chill world governments seemed towards the end. I think it was intentional on the author's part to keep the focus on the characters' journeys, not try to figure out whatever political clusterfuck would occur as a result of the ships appearance, but some might find it a little too optimistic to digest, if that makes sense.

Overall, this is a book for someone looking for a great, casual summer read that will no doubt remind them what a confusing, beautiful, chaotic, and wonderful thing it is to be a puny life form on a puny rock hurtling through the endless vastness of the universe. And what a lovely invention cheese is

Fun and engaging

A fun adventure story that I couldn't put down - nor did I want to. I love wish fulfillment tales and this fits the bill perfectly. A perfect summer read!

An absolute joy to listen to!

It hits all the right notes for me; it has romance,philosophical undertones on living, mystery, and ufos. It’s a dream book for me ❤️

Lukewarm Drama

It’s a nice feel-good story with minimal risk and drama. The kids were absolutely annoying.

Funny new author. Pros & cons:

Pros:

Loved the narrative of Blaine and Ann and the narrators voices used for the kids were so good and charming and hilarious.

Cons:

Wish that Heather & Oliver’s stories had a different narrator. Not because the narrator wasn’t great, it just was hard to keep track of the different narratives.

Pros:

Intriguing. I wanted to keep going.

Cons:

Slow at first.

Overall:

This was more tender and funny than “thrilling” (even tho I felt the tension at times.) I’m looking forward to reading more from this author. Clearly a talent, even though this book never went as deep as I’d expected it to.

What did I just read?

Funny, brainless, original alien invasion story with annoying children and too many cats. Aliens obsessed with plastic who look like meerkats. Idk how this got published.

Slow burn

I almost stopped listening to this book halfway through because it didn’t seem to be getting anywhere. Thankfully, I kept listening and I enjoyed the second half much more than the first.

Great story!

There are some books that I just enjoy better in print and I think this is one of them. Some of the voices grated on my nerves and I hated the voices of the children. I know they were supposed to be annoying...but I'd rather read it and imagine it than actually have to suffer through it.

Close encounters with nostalgia

Earth as it is on television is an easy read, that reminded me of some of my favorite sci fi movies from childhood, maintaining the lightheartedness of ET and had similarly wonderful character and relationship development as that of Close Encounters. The plot starts as a number of loose ends and leads the reader through a series of relatable sceneries and character interplay. All of which are painted with playful imagery before the story ties together at the end.

The performance was done well, providing a consistent read-through. The readers impression of annoying children is incredibly effective.

Not for me, either

I wanted to like something about this book, but I just couldn't. The characters were irritating - the boring husband, the too-perfect wife, the irritating, always-in-motion children who couldn't stop using slang like "chonky." The rich girl who, despite having everything, was bored by her very existence. The recovering comatose patient trying to regain his memories. All mixed together with overdone references to bacon and cats. Listened to this on double speed as some reviewers said the last half of the book pulled it together - but that last half, which brought our main characters together and showed how and why their lives intersected, was too improbable even for this novel. If this was an attempt to overlay absurdist fiction with a sci fi theme, the novel missed the mark.