Mooses with Bazookas
And Other Stories Children Should Never Read
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Mooses with Bazookas
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Narrado por:
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S. D. Smith
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Rob Riggle
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Joel Clarkson
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Sarah Mackenzie
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Gina Smith
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Andy Harvey
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De:
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S. D. Smith
Acerca de esta escucha
Mooses with Bazookas: And Other Stories Children Should Never Read is a fun collection of stories. It’s exactly like The Count of Monte Cristo apart from the many differences. Our lawyers have instructed us to warn you that listening to it may directly cause you to come down with every single disease you are worried about contracting. On the plus side, our nation’s beloved and heroic critics have had their say.
“FANTASTIC is not a word that comes to mind.”
—Beth Hinkle, author of Elite Prose
“ASTOUNDING problems at the sentence level and beyond.”
—Dr. Roger Johns, Ph. D.
“S. D. SMITH IS in dire need of A GENIUS editor.”
—Art Simonson, Inner Ring Magazine
“This author had nothing MUCH BETTER to do THAN destroy the language of DICKENS, SHAKESPEARE, AUSTEN!”
—Yammy Tork, Good Lit Guild
S. D. Smith has been called “America’s aft-most wordsmith” and is the award-losing author of more than ten books and less than thirty-seven books. He is half-man, half-rabbit, and half-mathematician. He lives in West Virginia with his wife and four children, because it would be kinda weird to live with some other family and super weird not to live in West Virginia.
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Historia5 out of 5 stars 62
Jack Zulu and the Waylander's Key is an enchanting adventure in the tradition of Tolkien and Lewis, as well as Spielberg and Lucas. But this fantastical journey launches in rural West Virginia in the '80s, with a half-Appalachian, half-African kid trying to escape the town he sees defining his small, sad life. Jack discovers a gate hiding a city between 12 realms and finds out where he truly belongs in a surprising, satisfying adventure.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Another epic tale for a great author!!
- De Shell27 en 01-26-23
De: S. D. Smith, y otros
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The Lost Key
- Green Ember: Lost Tales, Book 1
- De: S. D. Smith
- Narrado por: S. D. Smith
- Duración: 2 h y 38 m
- Versión completa
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General5 out of 5 stars 40
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Narración:4.5 out of 5 stars 36
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Historia4.5 out of 5 stars 36
Picket, Heather, Jo, and your favorite Green Ember heroes are back for a thrilling new adventure. In the days after their arrival at Halfwind Citadel, the friends are caught up in a desperate fight for the cause when an internal conspiracy threatens to unravel the growing strength of rabbitkind’s resistance.
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5 out of 5 stars
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I was hoping for another story/ stories after the end, whether before the end or after. This was wonderful.
- De Erin's Mom en 04-22-25
De: S. D. Smith
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The Black Star of Kingston
- De: S. D. Smith
- Narrado por: Eric Fritzius
- Duración: 2 h y 8 m
- Versión completa
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General4.5 out of 5 stars 1,408
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Narración:4.5 out of 5 stars 1,128
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Historia4.5 out of 5 stars 1,130
A century before Heather and Picket's adventures in The Green Ember, a displaced community fights for hope on the ragged edge of survival. Whitson Mariner and Fleck Blackstar face old fears and new enemies, forging a legend that will echo through the ages.
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5 out of 5 stars
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An Enchanting Tale
- De BookWorm en 02-28-16
De: S. D. Smith
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The Green Ember
- De: S. D. Smith
- Narrado por: Joel Clarkson
- Duración: 7 h y 55 m
- Versión completa
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General4.5 out of 5 stars 5,279
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Narración:4.5 out of 5 stars 4,522
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Historia4.5 out of 5 stars 4,509
Heather and Picket are extraordinary rabbits with ordinary lives until calamitous events overtake them, spilling them into a cauldron of misadventures. They discover that their own story is bound up in the tumult threatening to overwhelm the wider world.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Not Just for The Elementary Age Group
- De Chelle en 08-27-15
De: S. D. Smith
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The Last Archer
- Green Ember Archer, Book 1
- De: S. D. Smith
- Narrado por: Eric Fritzius
- Duración: 1 h y 53 m
- Versión completa
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General5 out of 5 stars 966
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Narración:5 out of 5 stars 756
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Historia5 out of 5 stars 755
Jo is a gifted archer with a burden on his back and a fire within. Eager to see the Longtreaders receive justice, he travels from his Halfwind Citadel home to a Cloud Mountain poised on the brink of war. What he finds there will confront his convictions and test his resolve as the war begins and King Jupiter's heir is revealed. A kingdom in the balance. An arrow aimed at the heart of darkness. Who will take the shot?
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5 out of 5 stars
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“That was a great story.”
- De CW en 12-22-17
De: S. D. Smith
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The Bark of the Bog Owl
- The Wilderking Trilogy, Book 1
- De: Jonathan Rogers
- Narrado por: Jonathan Rogers
- Duración: 5 h
- Versión completa
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General5 out of 5 stars 978
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Narración:5 out of 5 stars 812
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Historia5 out of 5 stars 816
12-year-old Aidan Errolson, comes from a long line of adventurers. His grandparents were among the first settlers of Corenwald's Eastern Frontier. His father had been one of the kingdom's greatest warriors. Aidan, on the other hand, lives the quiet, comfortable life, of a nobleman's son. He never has any real adventures, and that, he believes, is the one great injustice of his otherwise happy life. All that will change the day he first hears the bark of the bog owl, and meets Dobro Turtlebane.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Our Family's New Favorite!
- De Charles Yates en 12-31-18
De: Jonathan Rogers
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The Dragon and the Stone (The Dream Keeper Saga Book 1)
- The Dream Keeper Saga
- De: Kathryn Butler
- Narrado por: Shannon McManus
- Duración: 7 h y 29 m
- Versión completa
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General4.5 out of 5 stars 47
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Narración:4.5 out of 5 stars 40
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Historia4.5 out of 5 stars 40
Even though she's only 12 years old, Lily McKinley already feels the weight of the world's brokenness. She's seen it in her mother's exhaustion, her grandmother's illness, and the cruelty of Adam, the bully at her school. But most tragically, she experienced it two months ago when her father died in a terrible accident. As an artistic daydreamer, Lily has a brilliant imagination to help her cope, but that imagination often gets her into trouble. One day, it transports her to a fantasy world called the Somnium Realm, where her father's secret history embroils her in an epic quest.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Enjoyable
- De Chris Brenan en 04-02-25
De: Kathryn Butler
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The Dragon's Tooth
- Ashtown Burials #1
- De: N. D. Wilson
- Narrado por: Thomas Vincent Kelly
- Duración: 13 h y 8 m
- Versión completa
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General4.5 out of 5 stars 367
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Narración:4.5 out of 5 stars 313
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Historia4.5 out of 5 stars 317
For two years, Cyrus and Antigone Smith have run a sagging roadside motel with their older brother, Daniel. Nothing ever seems to happen. Then a strange old man with bone tattoos arrives, demanding a specific room. Less than 24 hours later, the old man is dead. The motel has burned, and Daniel is missing. And Cyrus and Antigone are kneeling in a crowded hall, swearing an oath to an order of explorers who have long served as caretakers of the world's secrets, keepers of powerful relics from lost civilizations, and jailers to unkillable criminals.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great story - great narration
- De Nancy Stubbs en 11-07-11
De: N. D. Wilson
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The Mysterious Howling
- The Incorrigible Children of Ashton Place, Book 1
- De: Maryrose Wood
- Narrado por: Katherine Kellgren
- Duración: 5 h y 27 m
- Versión completa
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General4.5 out of 5 stars 1,737
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Narración:4.5 out of 5 stars 1,490
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Historia4.5 out of 5 stars 1,495
Of especially naughty children, it is sometimes said: “They must have been raised by wolves.” The Incorrigible children actually were. Discovered in the forests of Ashton Place, the Incorrigibles are no ordinary children: Alexander keeps his siblings in line with gentle nips; Cassiopeia has a bark that is (usually) worse than her bite; and Beowulf is alarmingly adept at chasing squirrels.
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5 out of 5 stars
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ALL BOOKS ARE JUDGED BY THEIR COVER UNTIL THEY ARE
- De Jim "The Impatient" en 02-04-15
De: Maryrose Wood
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Peter Nimble and His Fantastic Eyes
- The Vanished Kingdom, Book 1
- De: Jonathan Auxier
- Narrado por: Michael Page
- Duración: 9 h y 42 m
- Versión completa
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General4.5 out of 5 stars 1,200
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Narración:4.5 out of 5 stars 1,014
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Historia4.5 out of 5 stars 1,014
Peter Nimble and His Fantastic Eyes is the utterly beguiling tale of a ten-year-old blind orphan who has been forced into a life of crime. One fateful afternoon, Peter steals a mysterious box that contains three magical pairs of eyes. When he tries the first pair, he is instantly transported to a hidden island where he is presented with a special quest: to travel beyond the known world and rescue a lost kingdom from its treacherous ruler....
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4 out of 5 stars
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Enjoyable listen but not for the youngest kids
- De Marie en 12-10-15
De: Jonathan Auxier
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Beyond Mulberry Glen
- De: Millie Florence
- Narrado por: Lyssa Browne
- Duración: 6 h y 10 m
- Versión completa
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General4 out of 5 stars 11
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Narración:4.5 out of 5 stars 9
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Historia4.5 out of 5 stars 9
Eleven-year-old Lydia Green doesn’t want anything to change. She lives happily in Mulberry Glen with her mismatched family of a fairy guardian, a philosopher, and twin troublemakers known as the Zs. But now, rumors swirl about The Darkness, a powerful force that dwells in the forest Tenebrae. Lydia knows The Darkness is nothing to be trifled with, but when a foolish choice by the Zs puts her family in danger, she must leave home and face the strange magical world of The Valleylands.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Great story!! But chapter 4 and 8 were out of order
- De Jill en 02-12-25
De: Millie Florence
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The Saturdays
- De: Elizabeth Enright
- Narrado por: Pamela Dillman
- Duración: 4 h y 7 m
- Versión completa
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General4.5 out of 5 stars 387
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Narración:4.5 out of 5 stars 268
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Historia5 out of 5 stars 267
The four Melendy children live with their father and Cuffy, their beloved housekeeper, in a worn but comfortable brownstone in New York City. There's thirteen-year-old Mona, who has decided to become an actress; twelve-year-old mischievous Rush; ten-year-old Randy who loves to dance and paint; and thoughtful Oliver, who is just six-years-old.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Excellent for children and adults
- De Dale en 05-15-04
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Adventures with Waffles
- De: Maria Parr, Guy Puzey - translator, Kate Forrester - illustrator
- Narrado por: Luke Daniels
- Duración: 3 h y 37 m
- Versión completa
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General5 out of 5 stars 417
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Narración:5 out of 5 stars 334
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Historia5 out of 5 stars 336
Hardly a day passes without Trille and Lena inventing some kind of adventure that often ends in trouble. Whether it's coaxing a cow onto a boat or tobogganing down the steepest and iciest hill with a chicken, there is always a thrill - and sometimes an injury - to be had. Trille loves to share everything with Lena, even Auntie Granny's waffles, which make everything just perfect. But when Lena has to move away, and Auntie Granny leaves the world, it sometimes seems nothing will ever be right again.
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5 out of 5 stars
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very fun!
- De AnotherCustomer en 06-28-20
De: Maria Parr, y otros
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Outlaws of Time: The Legend of Sam Miracle
- De: N. D. Wilson
- Narrado por: MacLeod Andrews
- Duración: 7 h y 58 m
- Versión completa
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General4.5 out of 5 stars 242
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Narración:5 out of 5 stars 207
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Historia4.5 out of 5 stars 206
Sam Miracle's life is made up of dreams - dreams where he's a courageous, legendary hero instead of a foster kid with two bad arms that can barely move. Sometimes these dreams feel so real, they seem like forgotten memories. And sometimes they make him believe that his arms might come alive again. But Sam is about to discover that the world he knows and the world he imagines are separated by only one thing: time. And that separation is only an illusion.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great writing, fun story
- De BC en 07-01-16
De: N. D. Wilson
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The Beginning
- The Secret of the Hidden Scrolls, Book 1
- De: M. J. Thomas
- Narrado por: Adam Verner
- Duración: 1 h y 23 m
- Versión completa
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General5 out of 5 stars 96
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Narración:4.5 out of 5 stars 73
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Historia5 out of 5 stars 72
In the first adventure in the series, Peter and Mary find themselves witnesses to the creation of the world just as God is speaking it into existence. Can they unlock the mystery of the scrolls before they get trapped in history forever? Children will discover the answer as the two characters ride rhinos, meet the angel Michael, and talk to a certain snake in the Garden of Eden.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Kid Approved!
- De ImABeliever en 04-06-19
De: M. J. Thomas
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Once a Queen
- De: Sarah Arthur
- Narrado por: Shakira Shute, Sarah Arthur
- Duración: 11 h y 6 m
- Versión completa
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General4.5 out of 5 stars 35
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Narración:4.5 out of 5 stars 33
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Historia4.5 out of 5 stars 33
When fourteen-year-old American Eva Joyce unexpectedly finds herself spending the summer at the mysterious manor house of the English grandmother she’s never met, she soon discovers that her family, the manor staff, and even the house itself are hiding secrets.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Highly recommend!
- De Victoria Still en 08-22-24
De: Sarah Arthur
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A True Home
- Heartwood Hotel, Book 1
- De: Kallie George
- Narrado por: Amy Melissa Bentley
- Duración: 2 h y 28 m
- Versión completa
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General5 out of 5 stars 5
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Narración:5 out of 5 stars 5
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Historia5 out of 5 stars 5
When Mona the Mouse stumbles across the wondrous world of the Heartwood Hotel in the middle of a storm, she desperately hopes they'll let her stay. As it turns out, Mona is precisely the maid they need at the grandest hotel in Fernwood Forest, where animals come from far and wide for safety, luxury, and comfort. But the Heartwood Hotel is not all acorn souffles and soft moss-lined beds. Danger lurks, and as it approaches, Mona finds that this hotel is more than a warm place to spend the night. It might also be a home.
De: Kallie George
Lo que los oyentes dicen sobre Mooses with Bazookas
Con calificación alta para:
Reseñas - Selecciona las pestañas a continuación para cambiar el origen de las reseñas.
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Total5 out of 5 stars
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Ejecución5 out of 5 stars
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Historia5 out of 5 stars
- Meg
- 06-01-24
Awesome!
S.D. Smith has done it again!! It is fabulously funny and I love it!! I was hoping for the next Jack Zulu book to come out next but this one is just as good!
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Total5 out of 5 stars
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Ejecución5 out of 5 stars
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Historia5 out of 5 stars
- Kathryn E.
- 10-08-24
I'm pretty confident that I like it
5 ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐s my family and me laugh so hard when
this play5⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ p.s southy is my favorite part in the book
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Total5 out of 5 stars
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Ejecución5 out of 5 stars
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Historia5 out of 5 stars
- Sarah H
- 03-09-24
So much fun
Five stars! One for every kid who laughed the whole time.
I am going to put this in my memoirs.
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Total5 out of 5 stars
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Ejecución4 out of 5 stars
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Historia5 out of 5 stars
- Kristen
- 02-27-24
Kids say "It's Hilarious!"
My kids loved Wally Warmbottom and his hilarious letters and play on words. Mooses in Bazookas was silly, funny, and overall entertaining. The only story we didn't care for was the one about the dog and the rocket, because the kids didn't get it, and wished that it was read differently.
Otherwise, the performance was just awesome!!
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Total5 out of 5 stars
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Ejecución5 out of 5 stars
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Historia5 out of 5 stars
- Kailan Boland
- 05-24-24
Silly. That’s all I can say
I could (and have) listened to this over and over again. I wish I could leave 92545519045291540154901549015401063015945294529469163926 stars.
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Total4 out of 5 stars
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Ejecución5 out of 5 stars
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Historia4 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 10-24-24
this is a funny book.
Moses with bazooka was my favorite. rocket and Elsie and Rocket on the other hand...
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Total5 out of 5 stars
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Ejecución5 out of 5 stars
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Historia5 out of 5 stars
- J Hill
- 03-21-24
I like bazookas so i tried this book out and i got hooked.
Why should you not read it? Because it has guns and bazookas says Wally Warmbottom, but i disagree,all children should read this book (or books). But you should know something. IT IS SUPER SILLY. I love this book 5 stars. Plus 500 more
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esto le resultó útil a 1 persona
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Total5 out of 5 stars
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Ejecución5 out of 5 stars
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Historia5 out of 5 stars
- Susan M.
- 06-27-24
Everything was so funny! When we read this, I could not stop laughing!
Infinite stars! S. D. Is so funny and I love how interactive he is with his readers.
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Total5 out of 5 stars
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Ejecución5 out of 5 stars
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Historia5 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 01-12-25
Walle wam doterm
I love the way the book was filled with more books and how much of it is funny
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Total5 out of 5 stars
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Ejecución5 out of 5 stars
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Historia5 out of 5 stars
- Luke Murphy
- 02-23-24
How funny this was to my kids and myself
Thank you so much for writing this. We I've been able to gather around this book and laugh. My 6 and 7 year old giggle at the quote "Of course you don't care because all you care about is essential oils" 😆
We will be enjoying this book for years to come
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esto le resultó útil a 2 personas