Jesus, the Eternal Bridegroom

By: Gabrielle Chana, Gail Chord Schuler

Narrated by: Gail Chord Schuler

Length: 11 hrs and 53 mins

Publisher's Summary

Jesus Christ battles for love in this epic true story. Agnostic Brent Spiner accepts Christ as his Savior after Jesus Christ rescues him from a UFO abduction.

When Brent Spiner has to take on Satan himself in a church service, Jesus Christ shows up to the rescue. He rescues Brent and Gail from Satan, now inside the body of Jesuit leader Zack Knight as the Antichrist.

The battle between Jesus and Satan rages, while Jesus works through Brent Spiner, Gail Chord Schuler and her men to defeat Satan's war against true love. All quotes from Jesus Christ come from transcripts of actual conversations.

©2015 Gail Chord Schuler (P)2015 Gail Chord Schuler

the 3 profits led me here

Would you consider the audio edition of Jesus, the Eternal Bridegroom to be better than the print version?

I believe 1 day a story will be written how 3 profits called the drunken peasants led the masses to the profit Gail Chord Schuler and she saved us all from the Jesuit's. praise be to her.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

Infallible Excellence

"We have such exorbitant eyes, that on seeing the smallest arc, we complete the curve, and when the curtain is lifted from the diagram which it seemed to veil, we are vexed to find that no more was drawn, than just the fragment of an arc which we first beheld". This was written by Ralph Waldo Emerson in his essay, "Nominalist and Realist" as a comment on peoples perception of seemingly great people. Emerson was certainly a great person, and an incredible author, but it would seem that this book not only puts the writing of this great man to shame, but also succeeds in refuting this point.

There are no flaws in this book, and, as is demonstrated throughout the remarkable history of Brett Spiner, an equal degree of perfection is present in Gail. The vivid Jesuit rape scenes make Emerson's otherwise astounding eloquence seem gray and shallow. The depth of plot make Emerson's inspiring rhetoric appear as childish as a shit filled diaper. This book cannot be recommended highly enough!

If I were to die now, I will have already experienced more than anyone could possibly hope for and, while I'm not exactly optimistic about the existence of an afterlife, or a heaven, if present, it will surely be a vile, puss-filled sac of tangible inadequacy, (preferable only to being reincarnated as Spot) due solely to the inevitable comparison with the experience of listening to this book.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

The love story of my generation.

Would you consider the audio edition of Jesus, the Eternal Bridegroom to be better than the print version?

I haven't had the print, YET!

What did you like best about this story?

The Jesuit semen.

Which scene was your favorite?

Bubba! LICK MY BUTTHOLE!

If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?

Shakespeare is jealous of this magnanimous, vivid and original work of art.

Any additional comments?

You will cum over and over.

8 of 10 people found this review helpful

Brilliant

love it! hands down gail not of this world. Her writing sure Is a masterpiece. can't wait for more adventures of zack Knight and the gang at church of Gail!!!.