Hellbender

By: Frank J. Fleming

Narrated by: Austin Rising

Length: 12 hrs and 14 mins

Publisher's Summary

Doug wasn’t sure whether he should trust Satan. 

The red flag was that he said he was Satan. But the deal was good: Listen to Satan’s story in exchange for some donuts. And Doug only half-fulfilled his part of the bargain. 

But maybe he should have listened better, because during his friend Bryce’s next scheme (theft with light to moderate treason - the usual), Doug and the rest of his friends - Lulu (the fun one) and Charlene (the not fun one) - end up with a powerful artifact, a small metal cube with world-ending power that Lulu decorated with bunnies. And now everyone wants the bunny cube, which means Doug, Bruce, Lulu, and Charlene are being pursued by a insane supermodel general, an army of sadists, a vast criminal organization, a smaller, more-in-startup-mode criminal organization, and an unstoppable killing machine - the worst kind of killing machine. 

Doug and his friends may be a bunch of losers who aren’t particularly smart or good at anything, but they have one thing going for them: a really cool name for their mercenary group. And now it’s up to Hellbender to save the world - well, what’s left of it. It’s pretty ruined and war-torn already. But, you know, they live there, so they kind of need it. 

It’s a mess, but that’s what you get for listening to Satan. Or half-listening.

©2019 Frank J. Fleming (P)2019 Frank J. Fleming

Women crazy, Diversity bad, Social Programs Bad

Repeat this message over and over again for 12 hours and you get the gist of this book. The main character is dimwitted, his friend is straight up misogynistic and racist, and almost every female in the book is psychotic or not acknowledged because of how "plain" they look. This book oozes misogyny at every turn and tries to make the concept of diversity as the foundation of a dystopian society (which by the way the author's concept of this dystopian diversity is women working in jobs they don't belong). This book feels like it was written by an internet troll edge lord and if you respect your own intelligence don't bother with this book, because it absolutely doesn't respect yours.

"Hey, listen to this..."

While listening to Hellbender, I found myself stopping family members and saying, "Listen to this bit - this is really funny!" And, they get a laugh because the author, Frank Fleming, does comedy well, but he does physical comedy really well. And, he does action really well. This book starts at a run and just accelerates from there. The book's universe is a not-too-distant future sci-fi with strong supernatural elements. The story follows four orphans who have become family to each other. They immediately get into trouble that spirals into ever-greater conflict, alternating between calamity and triumph. Fleming does a great job of world-building so that the pieces fit together and revelations build on one another finally to expose the true stakes. And, the protagonist is the most unlikely hero, but a heartwarming one to root for. I don't want to steal the jokes or give away too much. Intelligent action and quick wit - what more can you ask for?

ouch

listen to half of this book just waiting for the punchline to drop. honestly thought it was satirical in the beginning, but it's honestly just that stupid... there narration was terrible but I'd like to blame that on the story. I think the narrator could do better with the right material.

Very funny, kinda deep, amazing voicework

Great story. A writer who has his own voice but isn't afraid to give Asimov the business. An ending that gave you something to be curious about but not too cliffhangful. Laughed out loud many times. Memorable characters. Lowkey has a lot of substance. Best narrator for this range of voices I've heard, very few missteps. I do recommend listening at 1.15 speed.

LoL funny

Hellbender is a fun ride with plenty of laugh out loud moments. Fleming is masterful at juxtaposition and character development. If you enjoy stories set in a dystopian future, combined with a team of dysfunctional spies where things never go their way, in a way, that leads them to success, plus a dash of pop culture references and just a pinch of religious seasoning, then Hellbender is for you. Oh yeah, I forgot, and Robots. I recommend the audio book. Really great for those with long commutes. Narrator Austin Rising is brilliant at creating distinct voices giving full color to each character.

Entertaining as hell

This was one of the most entertaining and funny books I have listened to in a long time. From the first meeting with satan, to the would be man killing robot it was just a lot of fun the entire time!

Great

Frank J Flemming scores again with another great character driven book. I have read Superego and that's what peaked my interest about this. well worth a read - or listen to.

Really good.

Interesting story. Funny characters. Sci Fi. Fantasy. Dont take it too seriosuly just enjoy the ride.

Load of 💩

Don’t waste your credit until you like reading/ listening to something written by a 12yo.

Can’t wait to read more by this author

Trying to find the words to express how pleased I am without sounding like I’m fawning. Absolutely loved listening to this book. The narrator was flawless in how he portrays each character. You can picture their faces and demeanor in your head just from his voice. The story itself had me laughing out loud while still growing really attached to the characters and rooting them on. Hilarious, poignant, and timeless.

Surprisingly good

Well written characters, nicely layered plot, satisfying goodies, baddies and a few in-betweenies and immersive character acting. I hope there is more to come.