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Go the F--k to Sleep
- Narrated by: Thandie Newton
- Length: 4 mins
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Publisher's summary
Go the F--k to Sleep is a bedtime book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate and refreshingly honest, it captures the familiar and unspoken tribulations of putting your child to bed for the night. Colourfully illustrated and hilariously funny, this is a breath of fresh air for parents new, old and expectant*.
*You should probably not read this to your children.
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What listeners say about Go the F--k to Sleep
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Jennifer Drewett
- 05-07-16
Hilarious
Never has the sound of a desperate parent trying to settle their child been so believable.
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- my-retro-attic
- 10-24-14
Possibly the worst waste of 95p
What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?
how about having the reader further away from the microphone or using a filter so that you can't hear every breath she takes before reading each sentence with about as much feeling and heart as a mannequin
Who might you have cast as narrator instead of Thandie Newton?
Someone who doesn't sound like a robot??
Any additional comments?
Re-Record this and refund me!
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- Suzette
- 07-20-22
Quite funny!
A short quite funny little poem. Narrator seems to get the part of a tired mum quite well. Made me smile!!
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- Amazon Customer
- 11-26-21
hit the nail on the head
we've all been there 😁😁😁😁 absolutely spot on, , , , , , ,
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- Andy
- 08-25-16
Parenthood summed up in under 5 mins
It is simply the way of things, I have no idea how long we have survived so long as a species- given that, as newborns and infants we willfully refuse to sleep and eat, slowly degrading the sanity and functionality of our primary care givers and guardians. This tragic little tale sums up the bewildering, enraging, exhausting paradox of trying to persuade a small human to sleep as you battle to remain conscious.
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- Narrated by: John R. Erickson
- Length: 2 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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It's a tough job, but somebody's got to do it. Guts, glory, danger, and sacrifice are all in a day's work for Hank the Cowdog, Head of Ranch Security. While investigating a murder on the ranch, Hank finds himself the number-one suspect.
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Hank: a timeless chuckle for families everywhere.
- By The Super-duper Amazing Silver Golem on 03-16-16
By: John R. Erickson
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Born a Crime
- Stories from a South African Childhood
- By: Trevor Noah
- Narrated by: Trevor Noah
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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In this award-winning Audible Studios production, Trevor Noah tells his wild coming-of-age tale during the twilight of apartheid in South Africa. It’s a story that begins with his mother throwing him from a moving van to save him from a potentially fatal dispute with gangsters, then follows the budding comedian’s path to self-discovery through episodes both poignant and comical.
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Great book and perfect narration
- By MarilynArms on 12-15-16
By: Trevor Noah
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Zombified: Real-World Lessons from Fictional Apocalypses
- By: Athena Aktipis, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Athena Aktipis
- Length: 2 hrs and 33 mins
- Original Recording
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Athena Aktipis of Arizona State University is a self-professed apocalypse enthusiast, and as the host of the podcast Zombified, she knows the undead inside and out. With Zombified: Real-World Lessons from Fictional Apocalypses, she’s compiled her research and insights into a fascinating Audible Original that will have you thinking deeper about all those shambling, brain-hungry corpses in pop culture—not to mention our everyday lives. Drawing on years of research on zombies and zombification, these six lessons offer a fun way to explore and understand the many forces that influence us.
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Free fun food for thought
- By Lucy A. Pithecus on 10-07-23
By: Athena Aktipis, and others
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Napoleon's Hemorrhoids…And Other Small Events That Changed History
- By: Phil Mason
- Narrated by: LJ Ganser
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Hilarious, fascinating, and a roller coaster of dizzying, historical what-ifs, Napoleon's Hemorrhoids is a potpourri for serious historians and casual history buffs. In one of Phil Mason's many revelations, you'll learn that Communist jets were two minutes away from opening fire on American planes during the Cuban missile crisis, when they had to turn back as they were running out of fuel. You'll discover that before the Battle of Waterloo, Napoleon's painful hemorrhoids prevented him from mounting his horse to survey the battlefield.
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They just throw the facts too fast
- By Concerned_llama on 12-11-20
By: Phil Mason
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Slaughterhouse-Five
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: James Franco
- Length: 5 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Traumatized by the bombing of Dresden at the time he had been imprisoned, Pilgrim drifts through all events and history, sometimes deeply implicated, sometimes a witness. He is surrounded by Vonnegut's usual large cast of continuing characters (notably here the hack science fiction writer Kilgore Trout and the alien Tralfamadorians, who oversee his life and remind him constantly that there is no causation, no order, no motive to existence).
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Don't Quit Your Daytime Job, James
- By Keith on 11-20-15
By: Kurt Vonnegut
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Heads Will Roll
- By: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne
- Narrated by: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne, Tim Gunn, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
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Heads Will Roll is an Audible Original from Saturday Night Live star Kate McKinnon and her cocreator/costar (and real-life sister) Emily Lynne. Produced by Broadway Video, this is not an audiobook - it’s a 10-episode, star-studded audio comedy that features performances from Meryl Streep, Tim Gunn, Peter Dinklage, Queer Eye’s Fab Five, and so many more. Please note: This content is not for kids.
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More like this please
- By Anon893 on 05-03-19
By: Kate McKinnon, and others
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The Heron
- By: Don Winslow
- Narrated by: Ed Harris
- Length: 1 hr and 6 mins
- Original Recording
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“The Heron” is the nickname a big-city accountant has attached to himself in his new home near San Diego, where he’s using the alias to avoid a hit man who may be after him. It seems a former client believes that The Heron has skipped town with several million dollars not his own. Don Winslow’s ensuing, entertaining yarn is by turns twisty, dark, and comical as we observe the delicate dance between the pursuer and the pursued.
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Awfully long middle for such a short story
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 07-29-22
By: Don Winslow
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Monsters and How to Tame Them
- By: Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 5 hrs and 37 mins
- Original Recording
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Monsters and How to Tame Them is Kevin’s most recent guide on how to live your best life, wrapped in his signature honesty, hilarious voice, and adept storytelling. You’ve heard stories about vampires, zombies, and ghosts. Now it’s time to meet some of the monsters that haunt your mind.
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Entertaining, not useful
- By Anonymous User on 09-18-22
By: Kevin Hart
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American Psycho
- By: Bret Easton Ellis
- Narrated by: Pablo Schreiber
- Length: 16 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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