• Dance of the Reptiles

  • Rampaging Tourists, Marauding Pythons, Larcenous Legislators, Crazed Celebrities, and Tar-Balled Beaches: Selected Columns
  • By: Carl Hiaasen, Diane Stevenson - editor
  • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
  • Length: 12 hrs and 42 mins
  • 3.7 out of 5 stars (160 ratings)

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Dance of the Reptiles  By  cover art

Dance of the Reptiles

By: Carl Hiaasen,Diane Stevenson - editor
Narrated by: Arte Johnson
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Publisher's summary

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A collection of the best Miami Herald columns from the New York Times bestselling author of Squeeze Me on burning issues like animal welfare, polluted rivers, and the broken criminal justice system.

If you think the wildest, wackiest stories that Carl Hiaasen can tell have all made it into his hilarious, bestselling novels, think again. Dance of the Reptiles collects the best of Hiaasen’s Miami Herald columns, which lay bare the stories—large and small—that demonstrate anew that truth is far stranger than fiction.

Hiaasen offers his commentary—indignant, disbelieving, sometimes righteously angry, and frequently hilarious—on issues like the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, Bernie Madoff's trial, and the shenanigans of the recent presidential elections. Whether or not you have read Carl Hiaasen before, you are in for a wild ride.

©2014 Carl Hiaasen (P)2014 Random House Audio
  • Unabridged Audiobook
  • Categories: History

Critic reviews

"Hiaasen employs a seasoned bullshit detector that is among the most acute in American journalism.... If Florida is the poster child for a nation's fiscal and political disintegration, Hiaasen is the state's galloping knight (in)errant, slaying the dragons of ineptitude, arrogance and idiocy." (Kirkus Reviews)

"Entertaining... Hilarious and unnerving...for Hiaasen's ability to awaken outrage and for his eye for oddity." (Booklist)

"Although some say the satire practically writes itself in this state, Hiaasen raises it to a higher level. One caveat, though: Unless you have an intravenous drip of blood pressure meds, you might want to read just a few of these columns at a time." (Tampa Bay Times)

What listeners say about Dance of the Reptiles

Average customer ratings
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Great book. Required reading!

I've read pretty much all of Carl Haaasen's novels but wasn't sure how I'd like a book containing his newspaper editorials.
Wow, was I surprised. This book is brilliant. It has everything from humor to political shenanigans.
Arte Johnson is masterful as the reader.
Should be required reading for all politicians.

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8 people found this helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Loved the stories!

Would you consider the audio edition of Dance of the Reptiles to be better than the print version?

I loved this book and the narration was spot-on. I felt the Carl Hiaasen got a little preachy in parts but overlooking that it was a great listen.

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4 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
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    1 out of 5 stars
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    1 out of 5 stars

Don't Waste Your Money

What disappointed you about Dance of the Reptiles?

They made a lot of wild accusations with just enough facts to bring up the subjects and then used their own mostly incorrect bias assumptions as if they were facts.

What was most disappointing about Carl Hiaasen and Diane Stevenson (editor) ’s story?

Instead of fairly covering the issue and people they used their extreme left wing bias as if were facts. According to them the left is always correct and the right is always wrong. It is my opinion that's what's wrong with our political government now. I think we should do away with all political parties and vote on the candidates for their honestly and ambitions.

Who would you have cast as narrator instead of Arte Johnson?

He just presented the information that was given him. I have no opinion one way of the other.

What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

I purchased the book expecting I would learn from the information within a fair and honest coverage of its subjects and people. Many books seem to be able to do so but I found this book to be unfair and unbalanced. It only plays to the left extreme. Why do we support authors such as these who seems unable to fairly present the subjects and politicians.

Any additional comments?

I believe Bill O'Reilly and these authors should be locked in a caged ring and entertain their fans that away. They seem to think their opposing opinions are the only correct ones. It's sad that grown highly educated men can't use their talents properly researching and
presenting the facts whether good or bad in a honestly and accurate way.

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4 people found this helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Three scoops of classic Carl

If you've never read this fellows stories... Where the heck have you been????? His characters are graduates of Walt Disney mental hospital. The plots more twisted than spaghetti cooked. I can't help being drawn in and binge reading for hours. Bravo Carl Bravo!!!

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    2 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars

No Tales of Humor

Would you try another book from Carl Hiaasen and Diane Stevenson (editor) and/or Arte Johnson?

I've read all of Carl Hiaasen's novel, and find them hilarious.

What was most disappointing about Carl Hiaasen and Diane Stevenson (editor) ’s story?

This book is nothing but political stories from Hiassen's extremely liberal point of view.

What didn’t you like about Arte Johnson’s performance?

The narration seemed unrehearsed. There was no natural flow.

What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

I was disappointed. I thought that the book would contain stories about crazy criminal acts and public servants doing unscrupulous deeds. No...90% liberal politics mostly aimed towards Bush, Republicans, the NRA.

Any additional comments?

I'll still read his novels. He's a great writer, and they make me laugh. I will steer away from his other 2 collections of essays.

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2 people found this helpful

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    3 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Love Hiaasen; hated this

Way old stuff and not a typical Hiaasen anything that I'm used to reading by him. I realize this is a compilation, but still ... disappointed.

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    3 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars

Sad stories

Would you try another book from Carl Hiaasen and Diane Stevenson (editor) and/or Arte Johnson?

Carl Hiaasen novels are more enjoyable than this collection of true but distressing tales.

What could Carl Hiaasen and Diane Stevenson (editor) have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?

The humor in Carl Hiaasen novels helps a great deal.

Which scene was your favorite?

No favorites here.

Do you think Dance of the Reptiles needs a follow-up book? Why or why not?

No, no follow ups, please.

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    1 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars

Terrible

This book wasn’t for you, but who do you think might enjoy it more?

If your politics lean far to the left, you might like this one. Although the narrator was probably drunk when he recorded it, so just read the book.

What was most disappointing about Carl Hiaasen and Diane Stevenson (editor) ’s story?

I enjoyed about 10% of this book, but after the multiple chapters attacking the 2nd Amendment, I turned it off and deleted from my mp3 player.

Who would you have cast as narrator instead of Arte Johnson?

Just about anybody could've done a better job.

You didn’t love this book... but did it have any redeeming qualities?

The non-political portions of this book were great. Too bad 90% of the book is far left politics.

Any additional comments?

In the past, I've really enjoyed Mr. Hiaasen's fictional work. However, I'll never purchase, read or listen to anything else he writes from here on. But that's just me. If you are a-political or liberal, you'll prob like this.

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Too local for a European

I love carl Hiaasens novels. This book is a collection of his newspaper columns. If you are not a Floridian a lot of it will go over your head. But if you are familiar with Florida polliticks I am sure you will enjoy it .

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Mostly Florida political rants

No real story or thread to it. I was hoping for more Hiaasen humor and hijinks.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 03-06-22

Dance Dance Dance

I love Hiaasen. This is probably my straight through listen…I loved it. At first the narrator didn’t appeal and then like a grandfather. Writing becomes you!

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