Connecting Through "Yes!"

How to Agree When You Don't Agree to Get Cooperation and Closeness in Your Marriage
Narrated by: Scott Ellis
Length: 8 hrs and 56 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (24 ratings)

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Publisher's Summary

Do you want to turn your relationship crisis into relational connection? 

Do you want a way to improve your relationship without counseling?

What if the way you say things to your partner could re-connect you?

And, what if it's easier than you think?

For more than two decades, Jack Ito, PhD, has coached thousands of men and women to rescue and rebuild their relationships in the wake of relationship disasters including affairs, psychological problems, addictions, and total loss of love by one partner. In this groundbreaking book, he uses effective communication techniques to help you turn any marital conflict situation into an opportunity for emotional connection.

Dr. Ito's methods for building connection are empowering. In this book, he teaches the difference between sincere agreement and giving in (giving in actually reduces attraction), how to deal with an angry partner, a rejecting partner, and an uncooperative partner. Many people either argue with or avoid such partners, which only creates more distance in the relationship. If you have ever tried to end conflict or build your relationship by arguing with or avoiding your partner, you know it just doesn't work.

And, while giving space may reduce conflict, it never does anything to actually repair the damage to your relationship. Healing can happen even when you think your relationship is over. By learning to verbally get on your partner's side, you will end all resistance and remove the elephant from the room. This will also remove the tension from your relationship and allow you and your spouse to begin to enjoy being with each other again.

©2013 Jack Ito Ph.D. (P)2017 Jack Ito Ph.D.

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Amazing to say the least!!

I know that the teachings in this book will Bless my life!! I'm so excited to try the skills out.

2 people found this helpful

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Waste of time

There may be some nuggets of good advice in here, but...

1) I find it hard to take the guy seriously with the lack of understanding of the concept of evolution and the excessive Bible references. If I want a religious lecture I'll look for a minister.

2) A lot of the agreement examples feel somewhere between condescending and manipulative. If my spouse "agreed" with me in that way I would be more angry and driven away rather than feeling more cooperative and close.

The overall reading was ok, but the sample couple exchanges were really stiff and fake. A lot of that is the writing but some of it was the performance.

1 person found this helpful