Cloistered

My Years as a Nun

By: Catherine Coldstream

Narrated by: Catherine Coldstream

Length: 11 hrs and 23 mins

Publisher's summary

This program is read by the author.

"A profoundly moving memoir which gripped me . . . It’s about spirituality and asceticism and silence and sisterhood, but also about how flawed human beings can abuse power and how hermetically sealed communities, which should care for and protect their members, can be dangerously vulnerable to threats from inside their walls.”—Mark Haddon, author of The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime, The Porpoise and others

An astonishing memoir of twelve years as a contemplative nun in a silent monastery.

Cloistered takes the listener deep into the hidden world of a traditional Carmelite monastery as it approaches the third Millennium and tells the story of an intense personal journey into and out of an enclosed life of poverty, chastity, and obedience. Finding an apparently perfect world at Akenside Priory, in Northumberland, Catherine trusts herself to a group of twenty silent women, believing she is trusting herself to God. As the beauty and mystery of an ancient way of life enfold her, she surrenders herself wholly to its power, quite unaware of the complexity and dangers that lie ahead.

Cut off from the wider world for decades, the community has managed to evade accountability to any authority beyond itself. When Sister Catherine realises that a mesmerising cult of the personality, with the distortions it entails, has replaced the ancient ideal of religious obedience, she is faced with a dilemma. Will she submit to this, or will she be forced to speak out?

An exploration of the limits of trust, Cloistered shows us how far youthful idealism can take us along the road of self-surrender, and of how much harm is done when institutional flaws go unacknowledged. Catherine’s honest account of her time in the monastery–and her dramatic flight from it–is both a love song to a lost community and an exploration of what is most compelling, yet most potentially destructive when closed human groups become laws unto themselves.

A Macmillan Audio production from St. Martin’s Press.

©2024 Catherine Coldstream (P)2024 Macmillan Audio

Critic reviews

"When she was twenty-four years old, Catherine Coldstream lost her father, who had been everything to her. From the depths of her grief, she set out on a journey of poverty, chastity, and obedience in a Carmelite monastery in an area of outstanding natural beauty. During the following twelve years, Sister Catherine plowed, planted, and harvested vast fields of solitude and faith. There she experienced the power of prayer, the sometimes damaging politics and surveillance of monastic life, the numinous heights of music, and her own sharp intelligence. This incredibly beautiful and moving book is for all of us."—Dr. Carmen Bugan, George Orwell Prize Fellow, author of Burying the Typewriter: Childhood Under the Eye of the Secret Police, Time Being and Poetry and the Language of Oppression.

"This is is a memoir of emotions felt viscerally. But there are also remarkable spiritual insights, intellectual reflections on life and death and, of course, plenty about the intense relationships that developed between Catherine, and the other sisters. Engrossing and moving.”—Belinda Jack, Author of George Sand: A Woman's Life Writ Large and The Woman Reader

"In an era of relentless superficiality, Catherine Coldstream's memoir of her years living as a nun draws us back into the cloistered world of the inner life. It shows us what it is we may have abandoned in our lives of emotional and material dependency: a commitment to hope and faith; the transforming structures of a spiritual imagination. Here are beautifully crafted lessons in spiritual survival; the meditative practice of deep loneliness; of days wrapped in prayer and contemplation."—Sally Bayley, Author of The Green Lady, Girl with Dove, No Boys Play Here and The Private Life of the Diary

Fasinating and thoughtful

This book is beautifully written and performed. It provides a detailed story of cloisterd life and of a vocstional journey that evolves and changes much within a deep trusting faith and love of God.

A wonderful memoir, enhanced via listening to the audio book

A great listen. The narrative is honest, engaging and thoughtfully told. I’ll likely revisit this audiobook in the future.

The book I needed at this time

As a 70 year old woman who spent her whole life working for the Catholic Church (but not a nun!) this book gave an honest picture of the struggles so many of us faced. It was the final personal victory and sense of peace and forgiveness delivered by the author that can give us hope.

Fascinating memoir

First of all, the author gave a wonderful performance in reading her book. Very well done!
Being a spiritual seeker myself, I so related to the author’s life and search for her life meaning. The description of the religious community and relationships was very interesting. Yes, dysfunctional but sadly, not all that unique. I’ve been a part of and have read of many such organizations. As the author observed……it’s human nature.
Thank you, Catherine, for sharing your amazing story!!

Amazing story

The author provided the narration for this story. It started off a little bit slowly but it picked up the pace in the second half of the narrative. Her experience, to say the least, was shocking, especially her description of the beating she took at the hands of the now deceased prioress.

Overall, the narrative was quite captivating. I would strongly recommend it

An Exquisite Memoir

Once upon a time I seriously considered the cloister. If I had entered it would have been about the same era as the author’s experience. Through the audiobook I heard her tell the story of her initial years as I had imagined them for myself. I visited monasteries frequently while traveling to be transported by the chanting, by the stone corridors, the humble accommodations. Her story was a vicarious living of what might have been, including similar challenges, if I’d chosen a different path. Many years later, as a health professional, I had the opportunity to make visits to care for some aging cloistered nuns. While advanced in years they struck me as quite childlike emotionally and intellectually. Surely they had developed in similarly protected and sheltered conditions. I hope that reforms in monasticism have evolved and gotten through to healthier models of community and spiritual development. I’m very grateful for the authors courage and vulnerability in excavating and telling this story.

Unforgettable

Beautifully written and narrated on audio book . This genuine and compelling memoir of Catherine Coldstream's experience in the cloister will stay with me. Am grateful to have listened to this deeply spiritual work that incorporated both psychological and social dimensions to this moving story.

Beautiful book

Catherine Cold stream has written Cloistered, a deeply personal and beautiful book about her years as a Carmelite nun. Her relationship with the God she believes in becomes a challenge, as does her relationship with the Order she has joined. This is a very human story where people, including nuns, act as people do. I highly recommend this book.

The reading was wonderful.

I like the descriptions of life as a Nun and her every day life. I was pleased she was able to recover from her beating. A remarkable story of self sacrifice and forgiveness.

This spoke to me about a life I had not chosen for myself, but yet to which a part of me belonged.

"Sister Catheriine" writes very well about the taking on of religious life, the serious foibles of being human (whether cloistered or not!), the mix of Vatican II in religious disciplines, and ... the giving up of that life. Her sensibility and depth of feeling is amazing. like stories of "true crime" this is a tale of "true life" - lived with pain and love, dishonesty and ultimately honesty, a journey of a real self.

I found this an exceedingly good listen, especially in the author's own voice. I felt she was speaking to me. (Ms. Coldstream could have a new calling as a reader! Delightful voice! Very nice singing!)