Attack of the Killer Squirrels: Squirrelmageddon

By: T.J. Smythe

Narrated by: Karl A. Nordman

Length: 7 hrs and 4 mins

Publisher's Summary

After getting bitten by a squirrel in the park, Bob’s life takes a dramatic turn for the worse as people begin to die around him. The police believe these deaths are just unfortunate accidents, but Bob questions the police findings. Are they just accidents or are squirrels killing people and if so, is this the start of something bigger? 

Bob rushes to find the answers to save the city and his sanity but will he be able to save both?

©2018 Travis Smith (P)2019 Travis Smith

Needs work.

There was a lot going on with this story. I saw prior to listening that there were no reviews yet. I typically hate being the first to review a story especially if it’s not very good. So, where to start?! I’m going to do this review a little different from how I usually do them.

Pros/Cons for the story

Pros:
1. It was free.

2. The descriptions were good.

3. I liked the twist at the end.

4. I liked the “drinking scene.” That was probably one of the only funny (worth a smile anyways) parts of the story. The other was when Angel pauses everything and asks Joe how he fit into the tiny car. I don’t know if the author was going for a funny story. But when I saw the cover (didn’t bother to listen to the Audible sample to discover the unfortunate narrating), I knew I wanted to listen to it. The fact there were no reviews made me want to give this author a chance, hence I didn’t stop. Had this been any other person/book, there was no way I would have continued.

Cons:
1. The idea of killer squirrels was interesting, but it wasn’t executed very well.

2. The writing was subpar; it was too soon to publish, in my opinion. I get hiring an editor can be very expensive but at least get some outside people to read over the story prior to publication. I wouldn’t recommend family members or close friends as they typically aren’t as honest about issues in the story as a strange would be. Look for beta readers. (I’m one. I’m also an editor. If you’re ever looking for a free beta read and/or edit, please contact me at https://www.redpenediting.net/)

3. Tenses. The author had issue with using the correct tense. Chose to write the story in either present or past tense, switching between the two is a no-no.

4. Repetition. Do not repeat words or phrases (words in this case) in short passages. For example:
“They walked through the rest of the PARK. They passed a section of the PARK that had people doing Tai Chi. Another part of the PARK had people having lunch or just soaking up the warm summer sun. The PARK was very peaceful and seemed to flow from one portion to the next until they reached the end of the PARK and saw the sidewalk. They walked up the sidewalk and to the far edge of the PARK and then crossed the street.”

See the problem? There was no need to repeat “park” throughout their time walking through it. I consider that a poor example of writing. This could have easily been rewritten to something like: “They walked through the rest of the park. Passing one section showed a group of people doing Tai Chi. Further walking, people could be seen having lunch or just soaking up the warm summer sun. There was a very peaceful atmosphere in the park that seemed to flow from one portion to the next. Reaching the outer border, a sidewalk lay before them. They crossed the sidewalk, then the street.”

5. Questionable phrasing. “The squirrel slowly made its way to him. Slowly enclosing the distance he closed.” Besides using repetition again with “slowly…” what?

6. Time. There were issues, in my opinion, with how long it would take to get stuff done. For example, the squirrels are coming, everyone’s eager to get into the tiny Prius to safety. Once inside, what do they do? They sit for years watching the squirrels continue their path toward them. They sit for years and watch as the car becomes covered with the squirrels. THEN, they finally decide to start the car and go. Why wouldn’t they have just left once they were all in the car? OR, there was the time when Frank is passing out guns. Everyone has just watched the squirrels kill the guy outside of the Harmony building. What do they do? They stand there, not telling Frank to hurry, while he digs around in his car for his own gun. Were the squirrels just waiting for them to run away? To add some suspense? Was this like Jason who would allow a half-hour head start to the killee before chasing after them and still manage to catch up?

Pros/Cons for the narrator

Pro:
1. He did a pretty good job with the voices.
Con(s):

1. Just because a person can draw (very cool cover picture on the audiobook version, btw), doesn’t mean that person can narrator. I love to draw and read books, but I would never attempt to narrate one because I know I’m not a good speaker.

2. The reading was very robotic. It was easy to imagine the narrator sitting in his chair and getting to the end of one line, doing a long pause (as his eyes went to the next line), then begin reading again (and, no, I’m not talking about when he got to the end of the sentence).

Questions/Comments:

Bob is writing in his book. Somehow Mullet Guy is walking past and sees that Bob is writing about the Harmony science place. How? Was Bob writing that big?

Why would the newspaper have posted a picture of the Tai Chi couples smoke detector and not have noticed something strange (the marks) with it?

“He had a small idea.” Why not just an idea? What made it small?

Bob had been digging all night by the tree in the park, yet “after a light dig,” he’d been unable to find the hospital supplies. If he’d been digging all night, I can’t imagine he would have thought of it as a “light dig.”

Was the fact the characters would change Joe’s height supposed to be funny? I honestly wasn’t sure.



I received a free audiobook in exchange for an honest review.

very imaginative!

I thought it was a cute but very imaginative story. I like the characters in the story and it kept me interested throughout the entire story.

love the book, and the narrator now I want part 2

The story is creative, original and had to be fun to narrate.
The only issue is there was recording sounds at the beginning, like popping and cracking from an old recording.
Other than that, I thoroughly enjoyed the book/story.

Goofy story, like it's supposed to be

This isn't my favorite audiobook of all time. I think the premise is hilarious, but it took awhile to get going and for this type of story, it felt long winded and kind of boring for the first hour of buildup. I think it would have been better if it spent maybe 20 or 30 minutes on exposition and not much longer. I also found that the narrator's voices for the best friend who sounded like a surfer dude was a little forced and overdone. it didn't feel as natural for that type of character as I would have liked. I am glad to have it though, as I love unique selections to go back to in my library. Thanks again to the author and narrator for their work on this and for giving me a free copy for an honest review.

I really wanted to like the book

Disclaimer, I received a free copy in return for an honest review. I really wanted to like this book. The title looked fun. However I just can't get through it. the narration is just bad. It's like it was recorded one line at a time. Also the writing is very repetitive. Bob did this then Bob did that after that Bob did something else. I feel this would have been better if Bob was telling the story from his own perspective. Maybe the book version is better but the narration just didn't work for me.

A Very enjoyable book

Really enjoyed listening to it after having read the book. narrator did a good job. a very FUN book. Author has a very vivid imagination which is brought out when listening to the audio version. would definitely recommend.

Squirrelmageddon

I just say that this book has me cringing and laughing until I started crying. Well written and definitely a B movie plot. It actually would make a good horror film. I love the two plot twist at the end it kept me on the edge of my seat. I was given this audio book at my request and I am so happy I got it. I am voluntarily leaving an honest review. This book a scary fun.