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A Tale of Butts
- The Story of a Couch
- Narrated by: Robert W Wilson III
- Length: 1 hr and 54 mins
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A Tale of Butts
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Publisher's summary
My life has been one of butts: dainty butts, stinky butts, huge butts, soft butts, and even puckered butts. All these have touched my life and depressed my coils. I am a couch, and this is my tale.
A Tale of Butts: The Story of a Couch is a novel befitting The Simpsons/Robot Chicken generations. Adult humor marks this tale of a couch and all the butts it intimately comes to know.
Echo Ryan resides in northern California, where frequent naps are enjoyed with two dogs on the Palm Tree Couch.
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Story4 out of 5 stars 113
He lives in your community, in a nice house with a well-tended garden. He shops in your grocery store, bumping shoulders with you and apologizing with a smile. He drives beside you on the highway, politely waving you into the lane ahead of him. What you don't know is that he has an elaborate cage built into a secret basement under his garage. And the food that he's carefully shopping for is to feed a young woman he's holding there against her will - one in a string of many, unaware of the fate that awaits her.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Twisted
- By Richelle Reid on 04-03-15
By: Graeme Cameron
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Sister Mine
- By: Nalo Hopkinson
- Narrated by: Robin Miles
- Length: 11 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 128
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 118
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 116
"We'd had to be cut free of our mother's womb. Abby and I were fused, you see. But here's the real kicker; Abby had the magic, I didn't." Now adults, Makeda and Abby still share their childhood home. The surgery to separate the two girls left Makeda with what feels like an even worse deformity: no mojo. The daughters of a celestial demigod and a human woman, Makeda and Abby were raised by their magical father. Today, Makeda has decided it's high time to move out and make her own life.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Narrator saves this story
- By Denis A. on 03-21-14
By: Nalo Hopkinson
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The Grand Finale
- By: Janet Evanovich
- Narrated by: C. J. Critt
- Length: 5 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 398
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 219
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Story4 out of 5 stars 223
Berry Knudson had a talent for disaster, but when she climbed a tree to rescue a kitten, she wasn't prepared for the scrumptious hunk undressing in a nearby window, or her dive downward that smashed Jake Sawyer's pizza and won his heart! But was there room in her chaotic schedule for a risk-taking inventor with dreams? She took classes, delivered pizzas, and cared for three eccentric old ladies she rescued from the train station. But Jake thrived on a challenge, and he could be very inventive.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Save your money and time.
- By Csue on 04-05-09
By: Janet Evanovich
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Gathering of Waters
- By: Bernice L. McFadden
- Narrated by: Robin Miles
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 206
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 184
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 185
Gathering of Waters is a deeply engrossing tale narrated by the town of Money, Mississippi - a site both significant and infamous in our collective story as a nation. Money is personified in this haunting story, which chronicles its troubled history following the arrival of the Hilson and Bryant families. Tass Hilson and Emmett Till were young and in love when Emmett was brutally murdered in 1955. Anxious to escape the town, Tass marries Maximillian May and relocates to Detroit
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5 out of 5 stars
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Loved it!!
- By Naima on 07-26-16
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Care of Wooden Floors
- A Novel
- By: Will Wiles
- Narrated by: Michael Page
- Length: 8 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 97
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 82
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Story4 out of 5 stars 82
A British copywriter stays for a week at his composer friend Oskar’s elegant, ultramodern apartment in a glum Eastern European city. The instructions are simple: feed the cats, don’t touch the piano, and make sure nothing harms the priceless wooden floors. Content for the first time in ages, he accidentally spills some wine. Over the course of a week, both the apartment and the narrator’s sanity fall apart in this original and “weirdly addictive” ( Daily Mail) novel.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Five out of Five!
- By Pamela Harvey on 10-14-12
By: Will Wiles
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Chasing the Moon
- By: A. Lee Martinez
- Narrated by: Khristine Hvam
- Length: 7 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 805
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 727
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Story4 out of 5 stars 732
Diana's life was in a rut - she hated her job, she was perpetually single, and she needed a place to live. But then the perfect apartment came along. It seemed too good to be true - because it was. As it turns out, the apartment was already inhabited - by monsters.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Douglas Adams on Acid
- By Karen on 08-22-14
By: A. Lee Martinez
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Bleeding Violet
- By: Dia Reeves
- Narrated by: Suzy Jackson
- Length: 9 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 49
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 31
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 31
With a head plagued by hallucinations, a medicine cabinet full of pills, and a closet stuffed with frilly, violet dresses, Hanna's tired of being the outcast, the weird girl, the freak. So she runs away to Portero, Texas, in search of a new home. But Portero is a stranger town than Hanna expects. She discovers secrets that would terrify any normal soul. Good thing for Hanna, she's far from normal. As this crazy girl meets an even crazier town, only two things are certain: Anything can happen, and no one is safe.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Didn't like it. Sorry, not sorry
- By Cii'Em on 02-15-16
By: Dia Reeves
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The Apocalypse Boxed Set Novels 1-3
- The Undead World Series
- By: Peter Meredith
- Narrated by: Basil Sands
- Length: 42 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 431
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 392
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 391
Greed, terrorism, and simple bad luck conspire to bring mankind to its knees as a viral infection spreads out of control, reducing those infected to undead horrors that feed upon the rest. It's a time of misery and death for most, however there are some who are lucky, some who are ruthless, and some who are just too damned tough to go down without a fight. This is their story.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Worst writing and VO in HISTORY
- By kd on 11-25-20
By: Peter Meredith
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Timeless Moments
- By: Michelle Kidd
- Narrated by: Megan Tusing
- Length: 11 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 497
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 435
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 434
Jack Vines has the Victorian home of his dreams - or so it seems until he discovers an intriguing beauty lurking in the shadows. Stunned, he finds they share the house but live a century apart. The realization leads him to questions so disturbing it changes both their lives forever. She is a prisoner of the past, shrouded in a world of dark mysteries. He holds the keys that will protect their future. But first, he must solve the mystery concealed for nearly 100 years.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Good time travel story, great narration!
- By Long Island Reader on 08-09-18
By: Michelle Kidd
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The Witches of Echo Park
- By: Amber Benson
- Narrated by: Amber Benson
- Length: 9 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 139
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 122
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Story4 out of 5 stars 124
Unbeknownst to most of humankind, a powerful network of witches thrives within the shadows of society, using their magic to keep the world in balance. But they are being eliminated - and we will all pay if their power falls... When Elyse MacAllister's great-aunt Eleanora, the woman who raised her, becomes deathly ill, Lyse puts her comfortable life in Georgia on hold to rush back to Los Angeles. And once she returns to Echo Park, Lyse discovers her great-aunt has been keeping secrets.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Why,,,, is there only one!
- By SV on 11-05-19
By: Amber Benson
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Feral
- A Novel of Werewolf Horror
- By: Matt Serafini
- Narrated by: Matt Godfrey
- Length: 11 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 262
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 235
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Story4 out of 5 stars 235
Jack and Allen need a break. They’ve decided to spend the summer before their senior year of college out in Western Massachusetts. But their quest for rest and relaxation comes to an end when they arrive in Greifsfield, MA. Their friendship is tested by a mysterious beauty and her razor-sharp smile, then broken when they’re caught up in a rash of mysterious disappearances. How will these two friends cope with the truth behind a town that craves raw meat? And how will they survive beneath the glow of the full moon?
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4 out of 5 stars
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Infestation
- By Michael Oberhardt on 08-21-18
By: Matt Serafini
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Playing the Part
- By: Darcy Daniel
- Narrated by: Eva Kaminsky
- Length: 6 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 226
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 206
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Story4 out of 5 stars 208
Anthea Cane is a successful actress - well, action star. Her films are mostly about how hot she looks silhouetted by fiery explosions. But Anthea is determined to prove she's more than just a body. With the role of a lifetime up for grabs - a serious adaptation of her favorite novel - Anthea sets off to her small hometown in the name of research. Cole Daniel is a blind farmer with no patience for divas, especially one who mercilessly teased him as a young boy. When Anthea shows up using a fake name and pestering him into letting her stay, he can't pass up the opportunity to torment her just a little.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Cole had me at hello!!!
- By SIMARA on 02-05-13
By: Darcy Daniel
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Glorious
- By: Bernice L. McFadden
- Narrated by: Alfre Woodard
- Length: 5 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 254
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 189
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Story4 out of 5 stars 187
Glorious is set against the backdrops of the Jim Crow South, the Harlem Renaissance, and the civil rights era. Blending the truth of American history with the fruits of Bernice L. McFadden's rich imagination, this is the story of Easter Venetta Bartlett, a fictional Harlem Renaissance writer whose tumultuous path to success, ruin, and revival offers a candid portrait of the American experience in all its beauty and cruelty.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Gruesome violence
- By Marilyn on 11-22-11
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Dead Spots
- By: Rhiannon Frater
- Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell
- Length: 14 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 108
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 100
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Story4 out of 5 stars 100
The stillbirth of Mackenzie's son destroyed her marriage. Grieving, Mac reluctantly heads for her childhood home to seek refuge with her mother, who constantly reminds her of life's dangers. Driving across Texas, Mac swerves to avoid hitting a deer... and winds up in a dead spot, a frightening place that lies between the worlds of the living and the dead. If they can control their imaginations, people can literally bring their dreams to life - but most are besieged by fears and nightmares which pursue them relentlessly.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Good concept for a story that is badly portrayed.
- By L.M. on 10-13-15
By: Rhiannon Frater
What listeners say about A Tale of Butts
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Good Rider
- 02-11-20
Robert Wilson makes a professional performance.
Robert Wilson does an excellent job imitating the different character voices. Each voice is individual.
He has good voice inflections and is easy to understand, thus makes the odd story interesting.
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