Funny Horror

Sophie Sweet is a game programmer who adores three things: writing code; Doritos Surprise, the one thing she can cook; and her ride-or-die BFF Jodie Edwards. And only those three. To Sophie, people are a lousy bunch of jackasses who lie and leave when you need them most, so why bother? That goes double for "love," a ridiculous fairy tale sold to women to keep them subjugated and cooking things besides Doritos Surprise, which is madness. Sophie and Jodie have a tradition of getting their fortunes read at the carnival, but this year there's a new surprise in town-Tiffani the Psychic. The ...

Pandemonium: a twilight dimension of nightmare creatures, mythical beings, the undead, and everything in between. To Dead Jack, it’s hell sweet hell. In the first book of the series, the tortured, drug-addicted detective and his associate, the homunculus Oswald, face rogue leprechauns, ghost pirates, a sex-obsessed shark woman, sycophantic ghouls, an insecure fire demon, and a goateed maniac who calls himself the Duke of Pandemonium.

Sally has recently left an unfulfilling job to volunteer at a living history museum, where she is assigned to the Death House. Every day, she dons Victorian mourning garb and describes traditional funeral services to tourists. It sounds depressing as hell, but for Sally, it’s less depressing than her tepid marriage to her childhood sweetheart. This becomes all too clear when she accidentally travels through time and space to a liminal world where the ghosts of the living history museum haunt its grounds. There, she meets and falls hard for Victorian-era pretty boy Nathaniel.

Bloodier than Fried Green Tomatoes! Funnier than The Texas Chainsaw Massacre! Welcome to Gil's All Night Diner, where zombie attacks are a regular occurrence and you never know what might be lurking in the freezer. . . Duke and Earl are just passing through Rockwood county in their pick-up truck...

🎃👻 Why did the undead chicken cross the road? To get to the fool's house. Knock, knock! Who’s there? …The undead chicken😆😅😂🤣 – 🧟♂️🧠 written by unknown undead. Get ready to howl with laughter (or moan, groan & face-plant 😱🤣) this Halloween! Prepare for spine-tingling, side-splitting chills with the ultimate 🎃 categorized collection of Halloween & Horror Humor that’ll tickle your funny bone🦴🩻 & leave you cackling like a witch 🧙♀️💀! Get buried alive in an utter avalanche⛷️🏂 of face-planting😒🌵 BAD (😈 EVIL?) DAD jokes -...

#1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER ∙ A shimmering, joyful novel about a pair of opposites with the wrong thing in common, from #1 New York Times bestselling author Emily Henry. A NEW YORK TIMES NOTABLE BOOK OF 2024 Named a Must-Read Book of 2024 by TIME ∙ NPR ∙ ELLE ∙ Parade ∙ Woman’s...

Hilarious, fascinating, and a roller coaster of dizzying, historical what-ifs, Napoleon's Hemorrhoids is a potpourri for serious historians and casual history buffs. In one of Phil Mason's many revelations, you'll learn that Communist jets were two minutes away from opening fire on American planes during the Cuban missile crisis, when they had to turn back as they were running out of fuel. You'll discover that before the Battle of Waterloo, Napoleon's painful hemorrhoids prevented him from mounting his horse to survey the battlefield.

Beelzebub, the prince of demons, is bored. It's his destiny to one day rule the dark underworld known as the Red Realm, but it's sooo boring down there. All he wants to do is lay around all day in the lava pits (ahhh), boss everyone around (rude!), and maybe play a cruel prank (or two). But Beelzebub's father has had it with his son's nasty attitude. No one backtalks the Red King. NO ONE. A disgraced Beelzebub is banished by his father and cursed to spend his days in the worst place either of them can imagine. EARTH.

More than two centuries after World War III poisoned the planet, the final bastion of humanity lives on massive airships circling the globe in search of a habitable area to call home. Aging and outdated, most of the ships plummeted back to Earth long ago. The only thing keeping the two surviving lifeboats in the sky are Hell Divers - men and women who risk their lives by skydiving to the surface to scavenge for parts the ships desperately need.

NINE OVER-THE-TOP INSANE INSTALOVE STANDALONES IN ONE WILD BUNDLE! THIS IS INSTA-LOVE LIKE YOU'VE NEVER SEEN . . . ANNABELLE WINTERS STYLE! THIS BOX SET CONTAINS: GIVEN TO THE GROOM (100 pages) TRADED TO THE TRUCKER (126 pages) PUNISHED BY THE PRINCIPAL (121 pages) STRANDED WITH THE PSYCHO (123 pages) WIFED BY THE WARLORD (111 pages) LATE FOR THE LANDLORD (113 pages) VANQUISHING THE VIKING (115 pages) DISCIPLINING THE DUKE (111 pages) SAVING THE SINNER (109 pages) AND EACH BOOK CONTAINS: OVER-THE-TOP STEAM! (Yes, we're going there . . . ;)) OVER-THE-TOP PLOTS (Wait, what's a plot?) OVER-THE...

Elijah Muddle’s life changed in an instant. The son of a spiteful and mean manure farmer, Elijah now has become an apprentice to the town’s warlock, Caliban. The chance to escape his terrible father and learn magic? It’s a dream come true! Until...it turns out that Elijah’s internal magic is wonky, and he is the absolute worst warlock ever - all his spells go wildly wrong, causing both hilarious and disastrous consequences all over town.

She's unlike any one or any thing else: a Non-Standard Leashed-Intelligence Cybernetic Enforcer aka NSLICE-00P. The first of her kind, she's let loose into a universe of superheroes on behalf of her sinister masters to destroy all who oppose them. And everything's going according to plan—until NSLICE-00P gets hacked and sent into the past to kill her own creator before he creates her. Obeying orders as always, she wastes the poor guy. Unfortunately, there are consequences to initiating a reality-breaking time paradox. The most significant: total ejection from that reality.

This audio edition is read by Marin Ireland and Michael Urie as Marcellus. It was a Finalist for Audiobook of the Year. A New York Times Bestseller * A Read With Jenna Today Show Book Club Pick Soon to be a Netflix Film “This fantastical debut audiobook will enchant listeners. Gifted vocal...

Jane Austen fan Amelia Bennett sneaks away from a dull tour of an English country manor, only to run into a man more dashing than Mr. Darcy himself. About to lose his ancestral home to family debts, charming aristocrat Tom Calder invites his American guest to join him in drinking his way through the estate’s priceless wine collection. But when they wake in his bed the next morning, they’re convinced that in their drunken haze they witnessed a murder. Problem is, the body has vanished and no one believes them.

In 1972, the Red Bozos were the friendliest faces in frenetic Midlands Amusement Park. Flash forward four and a half decades: Midlands is a ghost park. Closed long ago and nearly forgotten, even by the locals, it sits shrouded in undergrowth and hill-topping forest surrounded by upscale new homes. Ringed with a decaying fence, hidden from sight, it presents a huge temptation to a group of bored, thrill-seeking youths who are about to learn that terror is, in fact, immortal.

Welcome to Eden, a town teeming with supernatural surprises, quirky characters, and more than a few laughs. The Librarian of the Haunted Library is a rollercoaster ride through a world where nothing is quite as it seems, and everything is laced with a twisted sense of humor. Armageddon is near. In this, book 11, it gets even nearer. The librarian can't stop it. His mother, who it turns out is a goddess, comes into the story, adding yet another complication to his already complicated life.

One night with a superpowered babe. Alan Star thinks he's the luckiest guy in the world, but fantasy turns into nightmare when a late-night meetup with a heroine turns deadly. To the dismay of the powers-in-charge, Alan has stumbled upon the dirty truth behind the squeaky-clean image of the hero business. Soon, everyone from government black ops to angry superpowered flames want to shut him up. Permanently. With nowhere else to run, Alan escapes to the one place that the heroes won't go: the underground world of a fabled hero-killer. There, he discovers the key to becoming the greatest hero...

From NY Times and USA Today Bestselling author Josie Litton, writing as J.K. Litton, a wickedly funny cozy romantic mystery for the holidays"A quirky, funny, small town mystery that had me smiling and laughing--" Amazon reader "Loved this story, I could not put it down"--Amazon reader "Intrigue, humor and small town appeal"--Amazon reader "A captivating whodunit, a charming town with quirky characters and a second chance at love"--Amazon reader When Santa turns up dead in his sled during the holiday pageant in the charming Westchester County village of Mulberry Falls, former paralegal ...

Fairy tales with teeth: brutal, bloody, and hilariously sweary retellings of the original Grimm classics. What's a Sweary Classic? The complete, original stories—same plots, same twisted morals, same body horror—just translated into modern, hilarious, sweary language that doesn't require a literature degree to understand. Think: all the dark fairy tale chaos, zero sanitized Disney bullshit. Cinderella's stepsisters cut off their own heels and toes to fit the glass slipper. Hansel and Gretel get abandoned in the woods, find a witch's candy house, and burn her alive in her own oven. Snow ...

Boxed set of the first three bestselling Vampire Love Story novels, including: VAMPIRE LOVE STORY (#1) Josiah Reign is a lover and a fighter. Out for a simple jog, he happens upon a young woman who needs help. So Josiah does what he does best. He takes on her attackers...all five of them, in fact. Little does Josiah know that this one act of goodwill will introduce him to a very strange world, a world of dreams...and nightmares. For this woman, Lena, is not who she seems, and her friends are the stuff of legends. Worse yet, Josiah finds himself falling for not one, but two of these deadly ...