Episodios

  • Five Minutes to Cicero A.D.

    Five Minutes to Cicero A.D.
    Feb 13 2025

    content: Feb 13, 2025

    Video (MP4): tcr! - Five Minutes to Cicero A.D.

    Personnel

    vocals: rob dickinson
    left guitar: kenny tipton
    right guitar: matthias downing
    bass: ian murray
    drums: adrian mcbrain
    programming: james barker

    Other

    Writing, recording, mixing, mastering, artworking: tcr!

    High Court Records, Pink Room Studios, Geneva, Illinois

    Lyrics

    Weird the things we take
    with us to the lake
    Keepsakes in our veins
    with us in our lanes
    Kissing at the stoplight
    In the broad daylight
    Double parked in your car
    Smoking with the stars
    I sucked I guess
    at just being cool
    And there you were
    eating all the glue

    5 minutes to, to Cicero
    Heard a love song and thought of you
    5 minutes to, to Cicero
    Running far away was all I ever
    Wanted to do, just me and you

    Was hopelessly in love with you
    You didn’t look up from your phone
    Convinced of us, filled with lust, and trust
    You were building great walls, I didn’t know

    Lost in, in a drift
    Stuck in, in a rift
    Looking for, for a shift
    Falling off, off the cliff

    Dreamed to marry you
    Keep you in my arms
    An endless love story
    Romance, all that glory
    Had to bluntly break free
    So that you’d agree
    Wasn’t easy for me
    Come over and leave
    It’s not what I wanted
    Both our souls are haunted
    Ever-after endgame
    Soaked in tears and blame

    5 minutes from, from Cicero
    I didn’t come looking for a fight
    5 minutes from, from Cicero
    I can cut you just as deep
    Gonna ignore you all I want

    Threw my heart and hopes on the line
    You sighed and laughed at my shoes

    You were just somebody
    Could’ve been anybody

    #diariespodcast #diariesvideo #tcrmusic

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  • Fix your wig (single)

    Fix your wig (single)
    Sep 25 2024

    content: Sep 25, 2024

    Audio (MP3): tcr! - fix your wig

    Personnel

    Vocals: Gibby Jourgen
    Left Guitar: Kenny Tipton
    Right Guitar: Matthias Downing
    Bass: Ian Murray
    Drums: Adrian McBrain

    Other

    Writing, recording, mixing, mastering, artworking: tcr!

    High Court Records, Pink Room Studios, Geneva, Illinois

    Lyrics

    You can dance to it. C’mon let’s go. C’mon let’s go.

    Momma, wake up. C’mon let’s go. Get outta bed. C’mon let’s go. Put on your clothes. C’mon let’s go. Smack that ass. C’mon let’s go.

    Slam some coffee. C’mon let’s go. Pull on your wig. C’mon let’s go. Slap on lipstick. C’mon let’s go. Smack that ass. C’mon let’s go.

    Put on your shoes. C’mon let’s go. Grab yer purse. C’mon let’s go. Fix your wig. C’mon let’s go. Smack that ass. C’mon let’s go.

    Get in the truck. C’mon let’s go. Get in the truck. C’mon let’s go.

    Tires on fire. Tires on fire. Tires on fire.

    16 valves of vampire. Red lining my lard desire. Twin teeth amplifiers. Windows down, hair dryer.

    Tires on fire. Tires on fire. Tires on fire.

    16 valves of vampire. Red lining my lard desire. Twin teeth amplifiers. Windows down, hair dryer.

    #diariespodcast #diariesvideo #tcrmusic

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  • The Sleepless Moons

    The Sleepless Moons
    Jan 12 2023

    content: Jan 11, 2023

    Video (MP4): 20230111 - The Sleepless Moons

    Audio (MP3): 20230111 - The Sleepless Moons

    It’s an older, original song but it still checks out 🚀 definitely share this with your friends 👽

    I am ready to go back to outer space. It’s my place, recognize the faces, the foreign shapes. I know the people of my race. And you are catching there at home plate and I’m clear off in left field. Not at the second stupid base waiting to make a double play. I’m out in orbit waving goodbye as I rocket far away.

    Rain delay. Too much dumb, damn static in our game. Can’t hear the signals, too much atmosphere. Houston, we have a problem: I’m burning up here. Arm’s singed to rubber. Bottom of the ninth and I’m patrolling Pluto.

    The only way to win…

    Lover, you just never knew what it was like to kick around in my shoes, sleep with my childhood rules learned in Sun, Sunday school. And I won’t count the sleepless moons I tried to appeal them for you. The shoes are broken in, the fans have gone. The laces are long, the currents are strong and I could drown in my freezing swimming, swimming pool.

    Behind in the count. Risky day for lift off, stars dealigned. Three balls and two strikes, zero gravity. Jammed comms, windshield cracked from your impact. Who’s that in the dugout? Guess I struck out. Broken hearts hemisphere.

    Tears in space…

    #diariespodcast #diariesvideo #tcrmusic

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  • Back to regular life

    Back to regular life
    Jul 21 2022

    content: Apr 19, 2019 · podcast: Jul 21, 2022

    Audio (MP3): 20190419 - Back to regular life

    Do you know what I really hate?

    When somebody is being over-the-top nice after they’ve fucked something up.

    Do you know what I really like?

    When someone offers up a sincere apology and then gets on with the day.

    Own it. Regret it. Forget it.

    Take five minutes, have a real conversation, and then go back to regular life.

    If I don’t acknowledge I can come across like an unsympathetic magician. Trying to trick you into paying attention to my magic rabbit and hat. All the while my other hand is holding a bloody knife. I’m not fooling anyone.

    And then if I’m dancing around like an out-of-the-ordinary, out-of-control ballerina with an obviously fabricated sugary song and dance, it only makes whatever transgression worse. It prolongs the distress.

    Elaine said to me seven years ago, “…and don't grovel.”

    I get “wanting to make it better” with flowers from up my sleeve and I’m sure I’ve tried to pull rosy ruses myself. But keep it to a minimum. Otherwise it’s a black reminder. The fuck up lingers like a red rubber band, stretching the hurt out for way longer than it needs to.

    Humility. Brevity. Authenticity. I won’t go wrong with these.

    #relationships #advancedsoul #diariespodcast

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  • The summer of 2019

    The summer of 2019
    Jul 18 2022
    content: Sep 27, 2019 · podcast: Jul 18, 2022 Audio (MP3): 20190927 - The summer of 2019 Peeps, it was a busy summer. Most of it was spent cleaning and packing up my house. That was a lot. I lived there for 11 years, the longest place I’d ever lived in my life. I threw away countless bags of trash, of life debris and clutter. ⛸ In June Sara and I went to see Ludovico at the Cadillac Palace in Chicago. Maggie and I went to Gay Pride in Aurora. Sara took all of us to Cantigny Park for my 47th birthday. We played mini golf in the dark during Swedish Days. In July there was the case of the stolen bicycle and Maggie turned 14. We went to Minneapolis to check out the Mall of America and Paisley Park. Maggie started high school in August, too. 😳 Five chipmunks were caught and released over the summer. I took over 450 photos. I didn’t keep track of how many restaurants that Sara and I went to. This month of September we went to Nebraska for Sara’s sister’s wedding. During the sermon or whatever the pastor shared a story about an older couple with a successful marriage. When asked how they had stayed together for so long the husband replied, “I always figured it was her turn to get what she wanted.” That’s how you win. In healthy relationships life isn’t all about getting what we want but most of it is giving people what they want. Keeping that Christmas spirit of giving all year round is one of the foremost keys to happiness. In a similar thread Jimi messaged me not long ago, shared something that Cokie Roberts’ husband had said regarding their marriage. It was that the most important life choice we can make is who we spend it with. So in August Maggie and I moved in with Sara and her kids. It wasn’t on accident or on a whim that I chose Sara. She’s beautiful, kind, selfless, and intent on everyone having a good life. 💝 Speaking of life choices, today is/was my last day at the job I’ve had for the last 13 years. See, I could’ve stayed at my job and in my house in Geneva and been mostly comfortable. But then again and I hate to say this but life can suck when you’re stuck in second place. I’ve lived much of my life in the moment, in the here and now, but sometimes it’s better to look bigger picture. What we’re doing and what we really want to achieve. Where we’re going and where we really want to be. Who we’re with and who’ll really give us the fairy tale. I’ve gotten divorced, I’ve moved, and I start a new job on Monday. Go team. 💪 #photos #lettherebehope #diariespodcast Got 30 seconds? Take the super duper, quick and easy podcast survey! Please. 😊 Love the show? Make a donation! Because you're the best. 💖 tcrbang.com · Instagram · Facebook · YouTube View original
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  • Whether alcoholism is an actual disease or not

    Whether alcoholism is an actual disease or not
    Jul 15 2022

    content: Mar 23, 2017 · podcast: Jul 15, 2022

    Audio (MP3): 20170323 - Whether alcoholism is an actual disease or not

    I have back and forth feelings of whether alcoholism is an actual disease like hepatitis or something. I guess at the end of the day it doesn't matter to me, doesn't change that my soul was sick. Emotionally distraught to the point it was affecting everything from my sleeping to my shitting to my relationships with Maggie and my cats. You that know me personally know my story.

    Did you ever see Back to School with Rodney Dangerfield? It's from the mid 80s, light hearted, goofy, classic Dangerfield.

    There's a scene where he's arguing with his professor about selling widgets. Dangerfield gets hung up on what exactly a widget is and the professor exasperated finally says...

    It's a fictional product, it doesn't matter.

    That's a powerful train of thought for me. Sometimes I can get hung up on wanting to debate a topic and often it's because I'm wanting to deflect looking at my own issues. I resist so I don't need to peer inward.

    When I'm deflecting I need to remember to self-critique. Maybe there's something I'm avoiding. And if so, the debate "doesn't matter."

    It's weird how I remember these lines from movies and they graft themselves into, make up part of my spiritual being. 😉

    Anyways. Is alcoholism a true medical disease? I don't care. What I do care about, what does matter is that I can't drink responsibly. I drink irresponsibly to the point of excess. I get frantic when I don't drink. It becomes the only thing I care about. Above all else. That's what does matter.

    Also, as a last thing. I do think it's a proper medical illness. The way alcoholics are utterly consumed by the cravings and will drink to literal death, well that's just not a lack of willpower.

    #alcoholism #healthnews #protip #diariespodcast

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  • If I'm feeling the same way

    If I'm feeling the same way
    Jun 21 2022

    content: Oct 17, 2018 · podcast: Jun 21, 2022

    Audio (MP3): 20181017 - If I'm feeling the same way

    If I’m feeling the same way a few days later about something I need to make peace with it. Or not.

    It’s true that the only thing I have to do with my feelings is feel them but sometimes they linger. They don’t resolve. And then I have to do something. I need to take action.

    Often times that action is just accepting whatever happened that caused my unrest to begin with. If the situation involved another person, for example, how would I act around them if it didn’t happen at all?

    That’s how I accept things. It’s not hard once I decide that I want to move forward in life. Regardless of where my feelings are at.

    Acting differently than how I feel isn’t denying my feelings or pretending whatever didn’t happened. It’s me deciding that I’m done with all that and am going to move on even if my heart is telling me something else.

    It’s not usual when the only closure I get is accepting that I won’t get resolution. That’s a realization I get to in my head because feelings can be icky and sticky.

    Like watching somebody leave when I want them to stay. I give them a hug and a kiss on the cheek, watch them get into the car and drive down the street. My heart twists as the taillights drive away. The physical bond between us stretches and dissolves as the car gets smaller.

    To the left. Around a bend. Disappear. Gone is gone.

    I turn and hobble up the sidewalk, the fallen leaves are too coincidental. The chilly air a nuisance, the gray sky unwanted.

    Inside the tears drip down like droplets over the outside of a boiling pot. Steam on the lid and mist in my eyes making it too hard to see what’s inside. Everything’s overflowing. Everything’s too much.

    The house isn’t empty but I’d rather be by myself. Alone I turn off the stove and the pot and the water start to cool. Just a minute ago the somebody was there and now I only have a fading memory.

    Okay stop. Enough with the melodrama.

    There was never a stove. Nor a boiling pot.

    Feelings are beautiful, magical things and experiencing them makes us whole human beings. They’re the yin to the intellect’s yan.

    But they don’t run the show and allowing them to will only end up making life miserable.

    #advancedsoul #diariespodcast

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  • Stuck behind a school bus

    Stuck behind a school bus
    Jun 8 2022
    content: Sep 12, 2018 · podcast: Jun 8, 2022 Audio (MP3): 20180912 - Stuck behind a school bus Sometimes when I’m going to work I get stuck behind a school bus. And then I roll my eyes… Today I watched a handful of parents corralling their kids, funneling them toward the awaiting bus. There were enough kids that I needed to count them so as to know when I could be on my way. 🚌 And then everything changed. Two of the kids were swaying, almost dancing. Little horses waiting to run. Smiles on their little faces, overly eager happiness as they waited their turn to board. Their day ahead would be magical. It already was. “We’re gonna do math and reading and writing and maybe some science.” If you’re ever feeling down, go watch some kindergartners waiting for the school bus. One dad looked especially proud, his heart overflowing with love as he readied his daughter’s coat and straightened her collar. She was his finest achievement by far. His little girl with yellow barrettes and her white backpack with pink butterflies. Having my own daughters I know the pride and the joy that she gave him. Kids change everything. They increase our capacity to love and give us a reason to. And then this father looked like he didn’t want to let his daughter go as she turned around. His heart seemed to break when she took a few steps away to mingle with the other little ones. Kisses blew from his mouth when she climbed the big steps up into the bus. This is a few weeks into the school year, too, so it’s not like it was his first day sending her off to school. 😊 The whole time standing a few feet beside him was another dad. He was a little self-conscious, like maybe he couldn’t put himself out there in front of the other parents so emotionally. There’s a mandate for him to play it cool but I could tell from his expression that he felt similar to the first dad. That was his baby growing up and heading out, too. He was just keeping his emotions in check so as not let the crowd see. That’s okay. Not everybody is supposed to be unchained. But guys, the first dad’s heart was too full of love to care who knew. So here’s the last yet equally important part of the story. I live in white suburbia with a picket fence and three bird feeders, but the interaction between these fathers and daughters took place in a lower income neighborhood. The parents and children were of all different colors, all different shapes, all different sizes. Those school kids accepted each other no matter what. That little one with yellow barrettes wasn’t afraid of people that looked different because those other souls are all she’s ever known. I hope she carries that with her for the rest of her life. And where they lived made no difference in how much that father loved his daughter and her white backpack. It didn’t matter to him that he was on the corner of a patch of weeds and she didn’t care that they lived in an older apartment building with a crumbling parking lot. It didn’t change the spring in her step or the bounce in her hair as she was off on her adventure. The sun was shining on them both even if there were clouds in the sky. ❤️ #schoolnews #lettherebehope #diariespodcast Got 30 seconds? Take the super duper, quick and easy podcast survey! Please. 😊 Love the show? Make a donation! Because you're the best. 💖 tcrbang.com · Instagram · Facebook · YouTube View original
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