Episodios

  • Divorce Is a Business Deal: Strategy for High-Conflict Divorce with Courtney Harkness

    Divorce Is a Business Deal: Strategy for High-Conflict Divorce with Courtney Harkness
    Jan 7 2026
    High-conflict divorces thrive on chaos. In this episode of We Chat Divorce, hosts Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan sit down with divorce strategist and coach Courtney Harkness to explain why treating divorce like a business deal—not an emotional battleground—can dramatically shift power, protect assets, and preserve peace. Courtney, creator of the Divorce Is a Business Deal framework, shares how successful professionals can stop reacting and start leading their divorce with strategy. Drawing from her own experience co-founding a private-equity-backed company and navigating a high-conflict divorce, Courtney breaks down the three-phase approach she uses with clients: Stabilize, Strategize, Execute. You’ll learn why emotional stabilization must come first, especially when dealing with narcissistic or high-conflict spouses; how reacting fuels conflict and legal costs; and why “no sudden moves” is one of the most powerful rules in divorce. The conversation also explores why rushing to hire an attorney without financial clarity often escalates conflict—and how preparation saves time, money, and long-term regret. Karen and Catherine connect Courtney’s framework directly to the My Divorce Solution methodology, emphasizing the importance of verified financial data, lifestyle analysis, and scenario planning before negotiations begin. Together, they explain how clarity replaces fear, how strategy changes leverage, and why winning in divorce isn’t “beating” your spouse—it’s getting out with your future intact. Key Topics Covered: High-conflict divorce strategy Divorce and narcissistic dynamics Stabilize, Strategize, Execute framework Financial preparation before legal action Why reacting is costly—and preparation is powerful How to protect assets, peace, and decision-making capacity If you’re navigating a high-conflict or high-stakes divorce and feel stuck in reaction mode, this episode offers a grounded, strategic path forward. Next Steps: Start with clarity. Take the free Divorce Financial Assessment or learn more about the MDS Financial Portrait™ at MyDivorceSolution.com. Follow Courtney Harkness at DivorceStrategy.com and on Instagram @divorce.strategy. Protect your peace. Let knowledge be your power. divorce, high conflict divorce, narcissistic spouse, narcissist divorce, divorce strategy, divorce coach, divorce support, divorce advice, divorce tips, divorce planning, divorce preparation, divorce negotiation, divorce settlement, divorce mediation, divorce attorney, legal divorce advice, divorce financial planning, divorce finances, divorce money, financial clarity, CDFA, certified divorce financial analyst, marital assets, asset division, hidden assets, spousal support, alimony, child support, custody conflict, co-parenting with a narcissist, emotional abuse, financial abuse, trauma bond, stop reacting, no sudden moves, divorce is a business deal, business approach to divorce, leverage in divorce, protect your assets, protect your peace, women and divorce, men and divorce, high net worth divorce, complex divorce, divorce discovery, divorce documents, divorce checklist, we chat divorce, my divorce solution, karen chellew, catherine shanahan, courtney harkness, divorce strategy masterclass Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    38 m
  • Your Divorce Financial Roadmap: A Clear Path Forward

    Your Divorce Financial Roadmap: A Clear Path Forward
    Dec 31 2025
    Most people would never start a cross-country trip without a map — yet that’s exactly how divorce begins for millions of people every year. In this episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan break down the concept almost no one talks about early enough: the financial divorce roadmap. Divorce is not just emotional — it is one of the largest financial transactions most people will ever make. Without a clear financial roadmap, decisions get made from fear, pressure, and incomplete information — and those decisions can cost you tens of thousands of dollars over time. Karen and Catherine explain what a real financial roadmap looks like, how it reduces conflict and legal fees, and why clarity — not speed — leads to better outcomes. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, rushed, or pressured to “just get it done,” this episode will help you pause, regain control, and make decisions that actually protect your future. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why divorce requires a financial roadmap, not just legal steps The most common “detours” that quietly destroy long-term financial security Why settling before accounts are verified is one of the biggest mistakes people make How emotions like fear, guilt, and urgency drive bad financial decisions The difference between reacting and negotiating with confidence Why most divorce conflict is actually about uncertainty, not money How a roadmap allows you to pivot when things change — without panicking Key Takeaways Divorce without verified financial information is gambling with your future Legal progress does not equal financial protection A roadmap is a decision tool, not a spreadsheet Preparation reduces conflict, legal fees, and regret You have the right to pause when information is missing Red Flags You’re Divorcing Without a Map You’re negotiating without seeing full statements You’re keeping expensive assets without knowing the true monthly cost You’re relying on verbal numbers or assumptions You don’t know what you need to live each month Your plan is “I just hope this works out” At My Divorce Solution, we call this roadmap the MDS Financial Portrait™ — a verified, structured view of your full financial landscape before permanent decisions are made. Because fear is expensive. Clarity is not. This episode is educational only and does not provide legal or tax advice. Always consult your professional team for guidance specific to your situation. Start with clarity: take the free Divorce Financial Assessment Share this episode with someone who’s starting divorce without realizing they need a map Join the MDS Community for expert guidance and live Q&A support Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    20 m
  • Divorce During the Holidays: How to Protect Your Peace, Your Wallet, and Your Future

    Divorce During the Holidays: How to Protect Your Peace, Your Wallet, and Your Future
    Dec 24 2025
    The holidays are supposed to be joyful — but when you’re navigating divorce, they can feel emotionally overwhelming, financially stressful, and deeply isolating. In this episode of Divorce Explored on the We Chat Divorce Podcast, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan have an honest, grounding conversation about how to survive the holiday season without falling apart — emotionally or financially. This is not a parenting episode. This is a human episode. Karen and Catherine normalize the reality that joy and grief often coexist during divorce — and explain why boundaries around money, time, energy, and expectations are essential right now. You’ll hear practical guidance, real personal stories, and clear permission to do the holidays differently this year. Why it’s normal to feel grateful and gutted at the same time How holiday expectations quietly increase financial stress during divorce The most important money boundaries to set before you say yes to anything Why “keeping up appearances” can cost you far more than you realize How to avoid holiday debt that follows you into January Thoughtful gift strategies that don’t require overspending Why co-parenting during the holidays is not a competition Time and energy boundaries that protect your nervous system How to say no — without guilt — to events that drain you Navigating the holidays with: Younger children, Adult children, or No children How forgiveness can be a gift to yourself, not a pass for others Why different holidays don’t mean bad holidays — just new ones How the financial and emotional choices you make in December show up in January You are not failing because the holidays feel heavy. Boundaries are not selfish — they protect your future and your stability. You don’t need to explain or defend your divorce to anyone. January will come, and preparation now creates confidence later. Choose one financial boundary and one emotional boundary to honor this season. Write them down. Keep them visible. That’s enough. At My Divorce Solution, we help you replace financial fear with clarity. Our process begins with a Lifestyle Analysis — real numbers, real insight, and a clear understanding of what you can afford before decisions are made. Learn how the MDS Financial Portrait™ gives you verified numbers, expert guidance, and a personalized roadmap to protect your financial future. 👉 Visit MyDivorceSolution.com We also invite you to join the MDS Community — a free, supportive space with live Q&As, expert guidance, and conversations with people who truly understand what you’re going through. You don’t have to do this alone. If this episode resonated with you, please like, follow, share, and leave a comment. Your experience may be exactly what someone else needs to hear. Take a breath. Protect your peace — and your wallet. Let knowledge be your power. In this episode, we cover:Key truths we want you to remember:Your simple holiday assignment:Need help navigating the financial side of divorce?Join the MDS Community Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    24 m
  • Divorcing a Narcissist: How to Break the Emotional Grip and Get Financial Clarity with Dr. Onalee

    Divorcing a Narcissist: How to Break the Emotional Grip and Get Financial Clarity with Dr. Onalee
    Dec 17 2025
    Narcissistic partners don’t just manipulate emotions — they manipulate money, security, and your sense of stability. In divorce, that mix is dangerous: fear clouds judgment, and confusion gets expensive. In this episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew (Legal Liaison) and Catherine Shanahan (Certified Divorce Financial Analyst) sit down with Dr. Onalee, an expert in narcissistic relationship dynamics, to break down what actually helps you recover — emotionally and financially — when you’re dealing with gaslighting, coercion, and high-conflict behavior. You’ll learn Dr. Onalee’s DONE framework (a 4-step recovery process), why “trying to win” arguments backfires with narcissistic personalities, and how verified financial clarity becomes the backbone that helps you stop reacting and start leading. How narcissistic dynamics show up as financial control, dependency, and fear Why people stay: the real role of financial paralysis (even when there’s money) The love-bombing → withdrawal cycle and why it keeps people hooked The counterintuitive strategy that protects your peace: neutrality, not engagement Why you don’t need to prove, protect, or defend your story to “flying monkeys” A practical mindset shift for long marriages: you’re not “too late” — you’re waking up A crucial divorce truth: you may not need to defend yourself socially, but you do need to prove assets with documents What to do if you’re afraid to ask for financial records or worried your spouse will find out you’re preparing Why “lawyering up” too early can pour gasoline on the fire — and what to do first instead Dr. Onalee teaches a simple framework to move from stuck to stable: D — Decide you’re done O — Look at the origin (the wound/pattern being triggered) N — No more (boundaries + detachment from proving yourself) E — Enjoy your life (rebuild identity, peace, and future) If you’re dealing with a high-conflict, narcissistic-leaning spouse, clarity is your leverage. When you know the numbers and have documents to support them, you stop negotiating from fear — and start making decisions that protect your future. Dr. Onalee specializes in helping people recover from narcissistic relationship patterns, rebuild self-worth, and create healthier relationships after high-control dynamics. She’s also the host of Coming Home with Dr. Onalee. Find Dr. Onalee: Instagram: @Dr.Onalee In this episode, we cover:Dr. Onalee’s DONE Method (the 4 steps)Key takeawayAbout Dr. OnaleeYouTube/Podcast: Coming Home with Dr. Onalee Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    39 m
  • Expert Divorce Advice with Susan Guthrie: Mediation, Financial Clarity & the Real Cost of Divorce

    Expert Divorce Advice with Susan Guthrie: Mediation, Financial Clarity & the Real Cost of Divorce
    Dec 10 2025
    In this powerful episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen and Catherine sit down with Susan Guthrie—one of the nation’s leading family law attorneys, top divorce mediators, and a recent guest on the Oprah podcast—to break down the realities of navigating divorce in today’s turbulent economic climate. With inflation, job uncertainty, rising debt, and shrinking safety nets affecting families across the country, divorce has become more complicated, more expensive, and more emotionally overwhelming. Susan brings 35 years of experience to this conversation and explains why fear and confusion escalate when people attempt to negotiate or compromise without verified financial information. Together, Karen, Catherine, and Susan expose some of the biggest misconceptions surrounding mediation, financial disclosures, attorney roles, and the belief that a net-worth statement or Excel spreadsheet is “good enough.” They outline the critical need for accurate, neutral financial clarity—something the MDS Financial Portrait™ uniquely provides—to prevent stalled negotiations, runaway legal fees, and emotionally driven decisions that people regret later. Whether you’re considering divorce, preparing for mediation, or already working with an attorney, this conversation offers the actionable guidance needed to move forward with confidence, strategy, and peace of mind. Connect with Susan Guthrie Explore her podcast and resources: DivorceAndBeyondPod.com Use her new AI-powered episode search tool to find topics like alimony, gray divorce, co-parenting, and more. Resources Mentioned MDS Financial Portrait™⁠ — the gold-standard tool for financial clarity in divorce Free Financial Assessment — learn where you stand and what steps make sense MDS Community — expert-led Live Q&A events and support Ready to Take the Next Step? Whether you're just beginning the divorce process or have been stuck in uncertainty for years, financial clarity is your strongest advantage. Start with the Free Financial Assessment, explore the Divorce Financial Portrait™, and step into mediation or legal discussions with confidence—not fear. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    50 m
  • Divorcing a Narcissist: Post-Separation Abuse, Financial Manipulation & Finding Your Power with Jackie Miller

    Divorcing a Narcissist: Post-Separation Abuse, Financial Manipulation & Finding Your Power with Jackie Miller
    Dec 3 2025
    In this episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan sit down with high-conflict divorce coach and post-separation abuse strategist Jackie Miller to talk about what it really looks like to divorce a narcissist, survive Crazy Town, and protect yourself from financial abuse during and after divorce. Jackie shares her story of a 16+ year emotionally and financially abusive marriage, how post-separation abuse showed up through the legal and court system, and why so many smart, successful women still feel “crazy” and powerless when trying to leave a controlling or narcissistic spouse. Together, we unpack how manipulation, false narratives, financial control, and threats of litigation are used to keep you spinning — and how nervous system regulation, financial clarity, and the right support team can help you reclaim your power, make smart financial decisions, and move forward. If you’re feeling stuck in a high-conflict divorce, being gaslit about money, or overwhelmed by attorneys, forensics, and financial documents, this episode will give you language, validation, and a roadmap for your next steps. About Our Guest – Jackie Miller Jackie Miller is a high-conflict divorce coach and post-separation abuse strategist who helps women and out-spouses disentangle from toxic relationships, reclaim their energy, and stop reacting to narcissistic manipulation — especially inside the family court system. A survivor of a 16.5-year emotionally and financially abusive marriage followed by a high-conflict divorce, Jackie blends lived experience, neuroscience, and practical strategy in her work. She is also the host of the podcast “Out of Crazy Town: Your Guide to Divorcing a Narcissist,” where she speaks directly to those navigating the chaos of narcissistic and high-conflict divorce. Connect with Jackie: Website: jackiemillercoaching.com Podcast: Out of Crazy Town – Your Guide to Divorcing a Narcissist (available on major podcast platforms) Instagram & YouTube: @outofcrazytown Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    47 m
  • Thanksgiving, Money, and Divorce: How to Navigate the Holidays With Clarity Instead of Crisis

    Thanksgiving, Money, and Divorce: How to Navigate the Holidays With Clarity Instead of Crisis
    Nov 26 2025
    The holidays can magnify every stress you’re carrying—especially if you’re quietly preparing for a separation, navigating financial uncertainty, or simply trying to hold things together one more season. In this special Thanksgiving episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan break down how to manage holiday emotions and protect your financial stability when divorce is on your mind or already underway. With decades of combined legal and financial expertise, the co-founders of My Divorce Solution (MDS) help you understand what really matters right now: ✔ Staying grounded ✔ Avoiding financial mistakes that follow you into the new year ✔ Keeping perspective when emotions run high ✔ Knowing what spending today means for your marital estate tomorrow This episode delivers clear, actionable insights to help you move from stress to strategy—because clarity is power, especially during the holidays. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    12 m
  • Rewiring Fear: Divorce, the Brain and the Path Back to Yourself with Isabelle Ulenaers

    Rewiring Fear: Divorce, the Brain and the Path Back to Yourself with Isabelle Ulenaers
    Nov 19 2025
    Your brain isn’t wired to make you happy — it’s wired to keep you safe. During divorce, that “safety system” often looks like fear, guilt, second-guessing, and staying stuck in situations that no longer serve you. In this powerful episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan sit down with neuropsychologist and therapist Isabelle Ulenaers, creator of the UNTAMED™ Framework, to unpack how your brain and nervous system respond to divorce — and how you can rewire fear so you can move from survival mode into self-trust. Isabelle explains why your brain treats divorce like a “lion attack,” how the amygdala, fight-flight-freeze response, and window of tolerance affect your decisions, and why so many women feel guilty for wanting to leave a relationship that “looks fine on paper.” Together, they explore silent divorce, gray divorce, burnout, numbness, and the subtle ways we abandon ourselves to keep the peace. You’ll also hear how daily grounding practices, nervous-system regulation, and practical financial clarity can calm your brain’s alarm system so you can prepare for divorce with a clear mind — instead of letting fear, urgency, or guilt drive the process. This episode is a roadmap for anyone who feels stuck, scared, or unsure whether they’re “allowed” to want more from their life, love, and money story. Resources Connect with Isabelle Ulenaers to learn more about her work, the UNTAMED™ Framework, and how she supports ambitious women through divorce and major life transitions. https://www.isabelleulenaers.com/ https://www.instagram.com/isabelle.ulenaers/ Turn Fear into Financial Facts with My Divorce Solution Visit MyDivorceSolution.com to learn how the MDS Financial Portrait™ gives you a verified, complete view of your marital estate so you can calm financial fear with facts and make confident settlement decisions. https://mydivorcesolution.com/ Join the Free MDS Community: https://community.mydivorcesolution.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    40 m
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