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In this episode of Paige’s Perspective, I dig into a powerful comment from one of our listeners: “As the spouse, I’m basically told to become an expert on their addiction, yet they don’t have to become an expert on my trauma.” This one line exposes the imbalance in the recovery world. Spouses are often told to go to Al-Anon, read the Big Book, and learn about addiction, but no one tells them to study their own trauma caused by their partner or expect their partner to understand the harm they’ve caused.

I’ll share why this matters so deeply, how living in chaos rewires your brain and body, and why hyper-vigilance, self-doubt, panic, and physical symptoms are not “character defects”... they’re trauma responses. We’ll also explore different forms of betrayal trauma beyond lying and cheating, from financial secrecy to emotional neglect, broken promises, safety violations, and more.

This episode is about reclaiming the focus: your trauma, your healing, and your right to be understood. Because recovery isn’t just about learning their dopamine pathways; it’s about acknowledging how their choices have impacted you and giving yourself permission to heal.

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Matt and Paige pull the lid off a loaded topic: resentment. You’ve been told to “let it go,” to forgive, to be grateful - but what if your resentment isn’t a defect...what if it’s a warning? In this conversation, we separate toxic positivity from real safety, show how resentment protects you in unhealthy dynamics, and explain when it becomes dead weight in a healthy one. We talk early recovery (why 1–2 years of consistent change matter), why prepackaged resentment slogans only work in safe relationships, how to name patterns without gaslighting yourself, and what to ask instead of “How do I get rid of it?”- namely, “What is my resentment trying to tell me?” If you want clarity on when to hold the line and when to heal, this one’s for you.

Find video clips and full length video from this episode on YouTube and our other social media pages!

On the web:
www.twfo.com

Support the Show:
Buy Us a Coffee!

Online Course:
www.independentlystrong.com
Use code WHEELIES75 for 75% off the entire course!

Soberlink Device:
www.soberlink.com/wheels

Check out our blog:
https://twfo.com/blog

Follow us on TikTok:
https://tiktok.com/@twfo_couple

Follow us on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/twfo_couple/

Follow us on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/TWFOCouple

Follow us on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@twfo_couple

Find Taylor Counseling Group:
https://taylorcounselinggroup.com/

Donate to Counseling for the Future Foundation:
Donate Here

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We’ve all said it: “I can’t walk away, I’ve already put too much in.” That’s the sunk cost fallacy talking. In this episode, Matt breaks down why we stay in jobs, relationships, and habits that don’t serve us, and the five psychological traps that keep us stuck. More importantly, we'll share practical ways to start moving forward so you stop protecting your past and start building your future.

Find video clips and full length video from this episode on YouTube and our other social media pages!

On the web:
www.twfo.com

Support the Show:
Buy Us a Coffee!

Online Course:
www.independentlystrong.com
Use code WHEELIES75 for 75% off the entire course!

Soberlink Device:
www.soberlink.com/wheels

Check out our blog:
https://twfo.com/blog

Follow us on TikTok:
https://tiktok.com/@twfo_couple

Follow us on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/twfo_couple/

Follow us on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/TWFOCouple

Follow us on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@twfo_couple

Find Taylor Counseling Group:
https://taylorcounselinggroup.com/

Donate to Counseling for the Future Foundation:
Donate Here