Join host Corinthian Finn, a.k.a. Finn J.D. John 18th Baron Dunwitch, for a one-hour-long spree through the scandal-sheets and story papers of old London!

PART I: “The HALF-CROWN CAMPIES” segment: 0:00 — 33:20:

• 01:27: VARNEY THE VAMPYRE; or, THE FEAST OF BLOOD, Chapter 33: Varney quits Ratford Abbey and walks to Bannerworth Hall; although the moon has not yet risen, he shows great familiarity with the grounds and is able to make his way almost blind. By listening to him muttering, we gather that the quest he is on is one which he hopes will furnish him with sufficient money to make his final £1000 payment early, and thus be spared the dread of the stranger’s last visit. But soft: is that a footstep on the garden path? Someone else is also walking abroad in the garden on this pitch-dark night. Who could it be?
• 24:35: BROADSIDE CATCHPENNY: An account of a couple of titled Regency roysterers on a spree, in which one bets the other £5,000 (about £600,000 today — $800,000 to $1.2 million in USD, CAD, AUD or NZD) that he can carry him on his shoulders nine times around St. James’s Square … with a twist.
• 28:50: TERRIFIC REGISTER ARTICLE: A “Tiger King” moment for the Regency era: A lioness escapes from a private zoo and attacked the Exeter Mail coach, severely wounding a horse and killing a brave dog and frightening the passengers half to death.

PART II: "THE SIXPENNY SPOOKIES," 33:47 — 1:04:30:

• 34:12: EARLY VICTORIAN GHOSTLY SHORT STORY, TO-WIT: Count Magnus, by M.R. James; Part 1 of 2 parts: A tour-guide writer named Mr. Wraxall comes to a town called Roebeck, family seat of an aristocratic family called De La Gardie. One of the De La Gardies, a man so cruel, brutal, and sinister that his reputation lingers even 300 years later, was a character named Count Magnus. Mr. Wraxall is fascinated by Count Magnus, and as he prosecutes his research he starts to see that Count Magnus has been on something called the “Black Pilgrimmage.” But no one will tell him what that is …
• 50:43: A SHORT GHOST STORY from the scrapbook of Charles Lindley, Viscount Halifax: Staying up late in the library of an old manor house to study some rare books in its library, our correspondent finds he is not alone ….
• 1:02:00: A FEW SQUEAKY-CLEAN DAD JOKES from the early-1800s' most popular joke book: "Joe Miller's Jests; or, The Wit's Vade-mecum."

GLOSSARY OF FLASH TERMS USED IN THIS EPISODE:

• BLOODS, BUCKS AND CHOICE SPIRITS: Disorderly young roisterers on a spree.
• KNIGHTS OF THE BRUSH AND MOON: Drunken fellows wandering amok in meadows and ditches, trying to stagger home.
• CORINTHIAN: A fancy toff or titled swell. Used here as a reference to Corinthian Tom, the quintessential Regency rake depicted in Pierce Egan's "Life in London" (usually referred to as "Tom and Jerry").
• CHAFFING-CRIB: A room where drinking and bantering are going on.
• LACED WOMEN: Virtuous women.
• GENTRY COVES: Gentlemen of high social standing.
• SNICKER: Small tumbler.
• BLUE RUIN: Gin, with the implication that it’s a cheaper grade.
• BITE YOUR NAME IN IT: Take a very big drink.
• JOE MILLER: A player at Drury-lane, in the early 1700s, who was famous for a Leslie Nielsen style of stone-faced comedy. Mr. Miller was always so serious (and don’t call him Shirley) that he was hilarious on stage. When he died leaving some dependents uncared-for, the jestbook was created by Joe’s friends as a sort of inside joke, as a fundraiser to support his bereaved family.
• RED WAISTCOAT: Uniform apparel of the Bow-street Runners, an early London police force replaced by the New Model Police (who dressed in blue rather than red) in 1839.
• GAMMONERS: Swindlers or bullshitters.
• ROMONERS: Gammoners who pretend to have occult powers.
• NEW DANCING-ACADEMY: The treadmill at Brixton Prison.

There are more! But we’re out of space here. A full glossary of all the flash-cant terms used in this episode is at ⁠https://pennydread.com/discord⁠ in the "#season-4-episodes" thread.

Join host Corinthian Finn, a.k.a. Finn J.D. John 18th Baron Dunwitch,* for a one-hour-long spree through the scandal-sheets and story papers of old London!

PART I: "THE HA’PENNY HORRIDS," 0:00 — 41:25:

• 01:20: DICKENS' DREADFUL ALMANAC for today: Three years before, she walked in on a murder that had just been committed …
• 03:35: SWEENEY TODD, THE BARBER OF FLEET-STREET, Chapter 76-77: We now cut away to Mrs. Lovett’s pie shop. It is thronged with eager customers and doing a land-office trade. But Mrs. Lovett is nervous. Her captive cook has suddenly started being super punctual and cheerful, which makes her suspicious. She decides she’s going to disappear from the scene; but she’s a little worried about that cook. If he pulls whatever stunt he’s scheming about too soon, it could ruin everything …
• 33:00: STREET BROADSIDE: A “catchpenny” broadside about a gang of highway robbers who murder a newlywed couple, and then one by one fall victim to deadly accidents.
• 36:35: TERRIFIC REGISTER ARTICLE: An account of an evil servant of a linen bleacher who murdered a neighbor kid to cover up his theft. In the 1820s, chlorine having not yet been invented, linen was still bleached by boiling it in lye and then laying it out on grass for seven days.

PART II: "THE TWOPENNY TORRIDS," 42:00 — 1:19:45:

• 42:30: BLACK BESS; or, THE KNIGHT OF THE ROAD (starring HIGHWAYMAN DICK TURPIN), Chapter 43-44: After our boys have a night’s rest courtesy of a family of gypsies — a noble and honorable people provided one respects their customs — the lads push on, keeping a sharp eye out for any chance to “do some business.” They soon come upon what looks like a wedding party! Who doesn’t want to be robbed at pistol-point on his wedding-night? The groom, that’s who! Who does? His newly-wedded bride, it seems. Sounds ridiculous, right? You’ll soon see.
• 1:02:20: SOME STREET POETRY from an 1830s “broadside”: "The Blooming Goddess” and “18s.-A-Week.”
• 1:07:20: ONE OR TWO VERY NAUGHTY COCK-AND-HEN-CLUB SONGS: "The bug destroyers” (about some exterminators called to purge the bedbugs from a whorehouse) and “Up the Flue; or, The Knowing Clergyman,” about a frisky chimney-sweep.
• 1:13:10: A FEW MILDLY DIRTY JOKES from what passed in 1830 for a dirty joke book: "The Joke-Cracker.

GLOSSARY OF FLASH TERMS USED IN THIS EPISODE:

• SPICE ISLANDERS: A punning reference to swindlers. A mace is a swindle, but mace is also a spice.
• SMASHERS: Counterfeit-coin makers.
• KNIGHTS OF THE BRUSH AND MOON: Drunken fellows wandering amok in meadows and ditches, trying to stagger home.
• CORINTHIAN: A fancy toff or titled swell. Used here as a reference to Corinthian Tom, the quintessential Regency rake depicted in Pierce Egan's "Life in London" (usually referred to as "Tom and Jerry").
• CHAFFING-CRIB: A room where drinking and bantering are going on.
• BAWDY DAME: A brothel madam.
• BUGGER: Then as now, a reference to sodomy.
• KNOWING CLERGYMAN: A rakish chimney sweep. (Like clergymen, chimney sweeps were always dressed in black.)
• CHUMMY: A chimney sweep’s boy helper sent to crawl into chimneys to clean them. These kids had a hard life, and often a short one.
• BLOW HIS BAGS OUT: Give him a really good feed.
• TO BE BURNT: To be infected with an STD.
• SHERRY OFF: To run away at top speed. Adopted from the nautical term "to sheer off."
• FLATS: Suckers.
• FLY TO: Wised-up about, aware of.
• FAKEMENT: Plot or scheme.
• TOPPING COVE: Hangman.
• THE OLD STONE JUG: Newgate Prison, or prisons in general.
• PADDINGTON FAIR: Execution day at Tyburn Tree gallows, which was in Paddington parish; during the years when the “Bloody Code” was in effect, and one could get “scragged” for stealing less than 10 modern dollars’ worth of goods, it was also a blackly humourous pun, as “pad” was Flash slang for “thief” or “robber.”

Join host Corinthian Finn, a.k.a. Finn J.D. John 18th Baron Dunwitch,* for a one-hour-long spree through the scandal-sheets and story papers of old London!

This is our main one-hour Sunday-night episode. Including, after the break, the "Sixpenny Spookies" segment.

PART I: “The HALF-CROWN CAMPIES” segment: 0:00 — 31:00:

• 01:20: VARNEY THE VAMPYRE; or, THE FEAST OF BLOOD, Chapter 32: Varney’s visitor at last arrives. Spurs clank as he walks into the room; he’s clearly come on horseback. Varney tells his visitor he dreads the visit because of the memory it evokes each year — a memory of something not spelled out, but we do learn that Varney was dead and now is alive once again. We also gather that the visitor holds some kind of awful power over Varney still. What could it be?
• 20:20: BROADSIDE BALLAD: A possibly-true account of a young shepherd who, shortly before he was struck by lightning and killed, had some strange and spooky dreams.
• 26:50: TERRIFIC REGISTER ARTICLE: A strange chapel in Bremen, where centuries-old corpses are preternaturally preserved.

PART II: "THE SIXPENNY SPOOKIES," 31:20 — 1:15:00:

• 31:40: EARLY VICTORIAN GHOSTLY SHORT STORY, TO-WIT: Wake Not the Dead, by Ernst Raupach; final part: Walter finds the sorcerer waiting for him. But the course he offers Walter as his last hope, is almost as horrible as being sucked to death by the vampire. Will he have the courage to do it? Will it even matter if he does?
• 55:00: A SHORT GHOST STORY from the scrapbook of Charles Lindley, Viscount Halifax: If you’re familiar with “The Invalid’s Story,” by Mark Twain, think that story, but with less stinky cheese and a more vocal corpse. Also, it’s a dog train rather than a railroad train. And … all right, all right, it’s a completely different story, but almost as much fun to read.
• 1:12:45: A FEW SQUEAKY-CLEAN DAD JOKES from the early-1800s' most popular joke book: "Joe Miller's Jests; or, The Wit's Vade-mecum."

*The Barony of Dunwitch is located in a deep forest glade west of Arkham (where, as H.P. Lovecraft put it, “the hills rise wild, and there are valleys with deep woods that no axe has ever cut; there are dark narrow glens where the trees slope fantastically, and where thin brooklets trickle without ever having caught the glint of sunlight.”) Actually it is a good 3,000 miles west of Arkham. It is not to be confused with Dunwich, the English seacoast town that fell house by house into the sea centuries ago, or Dunsany, the home until 1957 of legendary fantasy author Edward J.M.D. Plunkett, 18th Baron Dunsany.

GLOSSARY OF FLASH TERMS USED IN THIS EPISODE:

• COLLEGIATES: Prisoners in quod (gaol or prison). Not to be confused with ACADEMICIANS, which are brothel girls.
• BIRDS OF PREY: Lawyers.
• KNIGHTS OF THE BRUSH AND MOON: Drunken fellows wandering amok in meadows and ditches, trying to stagger home.
• CORINTHIAN: A fancy toff or titled swell. Used here as a reference to Corinthian Tom, the quintessential Regency rake depicted in Pierce Egan's "Life in London" (usually referred to as "Tom and Jerry").
• CHAFFING-CRIB: A room where drinking and bantering are going on.
• YARD OF WHITE TAPE: Large glass of white tape (gin).
• GOB-SLUICING DROPS: Beverage — your gob is your mouth.
• CAKES: Easy, stupid fellows.
• TOWN TABBIES: Dowagers of quality.
• RED WAISTCOAT: Uniform apparel of the Bow-street Runners, an early London police force replaced by the New Model Police (who dressed in blue rather than red) in 1839.
• GAMMONERS: Swindlers or bullshitters.
• ROMONERS: Gammoners who pretend to have occult powers.
• OLD ST. GILES: The most famous slum parish of London, also called "The Holy Land."
• RUM TE TUM WITH THE CHILL OFF: Most emphatically excellent.