This week I talk with IFS therapist and teacher, Kendhal Hart, about the real-world practice of IFS, how she integrates it with EMDR, and her view of IFS as a neurodivergent clinician.

Kendhal is the author of Treating Trauma with EMDR and IFS, a new book that offers clinicians a practical and compassionate guide to integrating the two models.

She shares openly about her recent autism diagnosis and how her neurodifferences shapes the way she understands, lives, and teaches Internal Family Systems. We explore what it looks like to practice IFS in real time, outside of demos, outside of formal training, and inside the small everyday moments where our parts and Self show up.

We discuss:

• Practical IFS steps tailored for neurodivergent minds

• What's missing in many IFS trainings

• How EMDR complements the IFS healing steps

• Befriending parts before moving to Phase 4 of EMDR

• How to track our internal systems throughout the day

• How to reflect parts and Self back to clients in simple terms

• IFS as a lifestyle

I didn't want this conversation to end. If you love IFS and want a fresh take on living and embodying it every day, in the real world, this episode is for you.

Kendhal's book:
Treating Trauma with EMDR and IFS: A Clinician's Guide to Integrating Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing Therapy with Internal Family Systems

About Kendhal
Dr. Kendhal Hart is a trainer, consultant, and trauma educator who helps therapists integrate IFS and EMDR. She is known for her nuanced, experiential approach to teaching and for supporting clinicians in developing confidence, clinical intuition, and sustainable practice.

I started this podcast to help spread IFS out into the world and make the model more accessible to everyone. Seven years later, that's still at the heart of all we do.

• Join The One Inside Substack community for bonus conversations, extended interviews, meditations, and more.

• Find Self-Led merch at The One Inside store.

• Listen to episodes and watch clips on YouTube.

• Follow me on Instagram @ifstammy or on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

I co-create The One Inside with Jeff Schrum, a Level 2 IFS practitioner and coach.

• New to IFS? My book, The One Inside: Thirty Days to Your Authentic Self, is a great place to start.

• Want a free meditation? Sign up for my email list and get "Get to Know a Should Part" right away.

Want to sponsor an episode of The One Inside? Email Tammy.

In this episode I talk with Ronda Bonfanti, an IFS client, memoirist, and self-described "IFS cheerleader," who reached out to me earlier this year to share her beautiful memoir, Talk to the Trees: From CPTSD to Loving Me.

Ronda has been on a healing journey for more than 25 years. She's done "all the therapies," read over 250 self-help books, and spent years trying to understand why she felt so broken inside, even though her life looked beautiful on the outside. When she found IFS, something finally clicked.

We explore:

• Her early years in therapy and why CBT helped a little but never stuck

• How discovering IFS gave her a whole new relationship with her inner world

• Writing her memoir with the support of Frank Anderson and Lissa Rankin

• The healing power of humor and why she sees it as medicine

• Journaling as a doorway into parts work

• What it means to write a letter to shame

• Loneliness on the healing path, and her longing to build IFS-aligned community

• Her dream to combine IFS and pickleball

She also reads one of my favorite chapters from her memoir — a hilarious, moving piece about her early days in therapy, banana splits, and her first meeting with Dr. Frank Anderson.

Ronda is one of those guests who reminds me why we do this work. Her story is tender, courageous, and full of hope. It's a perfect episode for a holiday week.

Learn more about Ronda here.

I started this podcast to help spread IFS out into the world and make the model more accessible to everyone. Seven years later, that's still at the heart of all we do.

• Join The One Inside Substack community for bonus conversations, extended interviews, meditations, and more.

• Find Self-Led merch at The One Inside store.

• Listen to episodes and watch clips on YouTube.

• Follow me on Instagram @ifstammy or on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

I co-create The One Inside with Jeff Schrum, a Level 2 IFS practitioner and coach.

• New to IFS? My book, The One Inside: Thirty Days to Your Authentic Self, is a great place to start.

• Want a free meditation? Sign up for my email list and get "Get to Know a Should Part" right away.

Want to sponsor an episode of The One Inside? Email Tammy.

In this episode, I talk with Max Littman, an IFS therapist, consultant, and writer. Max's new book, Internal Family Systems Therapy for Gay and Queer Men: A Companion for After Coming Out, launched the morning we recorded this conversation.

His work centers on attachment, attunement, cultural burdens, and the relational impact of trauma — especially for gay and queer men who are still healing the parts shaped by growing up without safety, guidance, or representation.

We talk about why this book matters, the parts that continue to carry burden even after coming out, and the places where Queer identity, family dynamics, and IFS meet.

"Unburdening offers an opportunity to reclaim a personal embodied sense of spirituality, one that honors our inherent worth and belonging."

Max shares his own story of growing up without language for his identity, the isolation he felt as a teen, and how those experiences shaped his clinical work. He describes a part he calls "teen without guidance," and the insight that came from recognizing how much that part still needed care.

Together, we explore:

• What coming out doesn't automatically heal

• The "teen without guidance" part and why it matters

• How cultural, religious, and family burdens live in the system

• The longing for belonging and its impact on relationships

• How IFS helps gay and queer men reclaim sexuality, connection, and choice

• The role of community, experimentation, and attunement in healing

• The challenge of navigating adulthood with fewer developmental and relational experiences than many same-aged peers received

Be sure to check out Max's blog that I keep hearing so much about.

And don't miss my extended interview with Max over on Substack for paid subscribers.

About Max Littman

Max Littman is an IFS therapist, consultant, and writer based in Oakland. He works at the crossroads of Queer healing, trauma recovery, and attachment. His debut book, Internal Family Systems Therapy for Gay and Queer Men, is available now. Learn more or connect with him at maxlittman.com.

This episode is sponsored by the Unblend.me web app. You know those moments between sessions when something comes up and you need a gentle nudge to pause, slow down and go inside? The Unblend app helps you do just that. It's IFS informed, HIPAA compliant, and guides you through checking in with your parts to calm your nervous system. Learn more and try it for free at Unblend.me

I started this podcast to help spread IFS out into the world and make the model more accessible to everyone. Seven years later, that's still at the heart of all we do.

• Join The One Inside Substack community for bonus conversations, extended interviews, meditations, and more.

• Find Self-Led merch at The One Inside store.

• Listen to episodes and watch clips on YouTube.

• Follow me on Instagram @ifstammy or on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

I co-create The One Inside with Jeff Schrum, a Level 2 IFS practitioner and coach.

• New to IFS? My book, The One Inside: Thirty Days to Your Authentic Self, is a great place to start.

• Want a free meditation? Sign up for my email list and get "Get to Know a Should Part" right away.

Want to sponsor an episode of The One Inside? Email Tammy.