On today's show, I discuss the often misunderstood concept of agency, what it is, what it isn’t, and why so many people unknowingly live without it. We explore how agency gets eroded through trauma, family systems, cultural roles, and relationship dynamics, including in kink and power exchange. I break down the difference between agency and control, autonomy, rebellion, and codependency, and offer real steps for reclaiming your voice and choices, even when it costs you. This episode isn’t about having all the answers, it’s about learning to ask the right questions so you can stop living on default and start living on purpose.

Continue the discussion on Fetlife: @Enhanced-Mind

Don't forget to hit the follow button and rate my show 5 stars so others may find it. What to be on the show or have an idea for an upcoming episode? Email me at TheKinkPerspective@gmail.com

Find me on Substack - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Enhanced-Mind's Substack | Chris C. | Substack⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you are looking for a therapist that is knowledgeable about the lifestyle, or just a therapist in general, please feel free to reach out through my website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://enhanced-mind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

I have a book out, Tangled Desires: Exploring the Intersection of BDSM and Psychology. Can find it where you purchase most of your ebooks. Print version out now!

#BDSM #Psychology #Agency #Choice

On today's show, I discuss the challenge of feeling like you're "too much" in relationships, especially when your emotional and sexual needs aren't being met. We explore how emotional needs are not too big but are often about finding the right compatibility with someone who can truly meet you where you are. Whether you’re in a traditional or BDSM relationship, understanding your own needs and recognizing emotional compatibility is key.

Continue the discussion on Fetlife: @Enhanced-Mind

Don't forget to hit the follow button and rate my show 5 stars so others may find it. What to be on the show or have an idea for an upcoming episode? Email me at TheKinkPerspective@gmail.com

Find me on Substack - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Enhanced-Mind's Substack | Chris C. | Substack⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you are looking for a therapist that is knowledgeable about the lifestyle, or just a therapist in general, please feel free to reach out through my website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://enhanced-mind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

I have a book out, Tangled Desires: Exploring the Intersection of BDSM and Psychology. Can find it where you purchase most of your ebooks. Print version out now!

#BDSM #Psychology #EmotionalNeeds

On today’s show, I discuss what it really means when someone feels the urge to lose. To give in, fold, apologize, or beg for forgiveness, not out of peace but out of fear. We look at the collapse response as a survival strategy, not a flaw, and explore how it shows up in both vanilla and kink relationships. I break down the difference between collapse and submission, why disappearing can feel safer than standing up, and how early emotional conditioning shapes this pattern. If you’ve ever felt like losing keeps you connected, this episode is for you.

Continue the discussion on Fetlife: @Enhanced-Mind

Don't forget to hit the follow button and rate my show 5 stars so others may find it. What to be on the show or have an idea for an upcoming episode? Email me at TheKinkPerspective@gmail.com

Find me on Substack - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Enhanced-Mind's Substack | Chris C. | Substack⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you are looking for a therapist that is knowledgeable about the lifestyle, or just a therapist in general, please feel free to reach out through my website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://enhanced-mind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

I have a book out, Tangled Desires: Exploring the Intersection of BDSM and Psychology. Can find it where you purchase most of your ebooks. Print version out now!

#BDSM #Psychology #Collapse #Survival

On today’s show, I discuss trauma bonding, what it is, how it forms, and why it feels so powerful. We take a clinical and grounded look at the psychological mechanisms behind trauma bonding, from intermittent reinforcement to early survival adaptations shaped by attachment wounds. I break down how these patterns show up in both vanilla relationships and kink dynamics, where power exchange can sometimes blur the line between healthy vulnerability and trauma reenactment. We cover the red flags to watch for, why smart and self-aware people can get pulled into these cycles, and what it takes to begin breaking them. If you have ever wondered why unstable relationships can feel so compelling, this episode will give you a deeper understanding.

Continue the discussion on Fetlife: @Enhanced-Mind

Don't forget to hit the follow button and rate my show 5 stars so others may find it. What to be on the show or have an idea for an upcoming episode? Email me at TheKinkPerspective@gmail.com

Find me on Substack - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Enhanced-Mind's Substack | Chris C. | Substack⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you are looking for a therapist that is knowledgeable about the lifestyle, or just a therapist in general, please feel free to reach out through my website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://enhanced-mind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

I have a book out, Tangled Desires: Exploring the Intersection of BDSM and Psychology. Can find it where you purchase most of your ebooks. Print version out now!

#BDSM #Psychology #Trauma #Bonding

On today’s show, I discuss the reality behind love bombing: what it is, why it works, and how it shows up in both vanilla and kink dynamics. We’ll look at the psychology behind the behavior, the emotional impact on the person receiving it, and the signs you might already be in it without realizing. From rushed intimacy to coercive affection, I break down how love bombing can distort consent, erode pacing, and blur the line between connection and control. Whether you're a Dom, sub, or just someone trying to understand where intensity ends and manipulation begins.

Continue the discussion on Fetlife: @Enhanced-Mind

Don't forget to hit the follow button and rate my show 5 stars so others may find it. What to be on the show or have an idea for an upcoming episode? Email me at TheKinkPerspective@gmail.com

Find me on Substack - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Enhanced-Mind's Substack | Chris C. | Substack⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you are looking for a therapist that is knowledgeable about the lifestyle, or just a therapist in general, please feel free to reach out through my website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://enhanced-mind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

I have a book out, Tangled Desires: Exploring the Intersection of BDSM and Psychology. Can find it where you purchase most of your ebooks. Print version out now!

#BDSM #Psychology #LoveBombing

On today’s show, I discuss what happens when the relationship you built no longer fits the life you’re living now. I explore the need for renegotiation, not because something is broken, but because people change. From emotional contracts and outdated roles to attachment patterns and the psychology of growth, I break down why honest check-ins matter and how to approach them without fear. Whether you're in a vanilla marriage, a long-term D/s dynamic, or somewhere in between, this episode offers insight into how relationships evolve and how to meet each other again with clarity, presence, and intention.

Continue the discussion on Fetlife: @Enhanced-Mind

Don't forget to hit the follow button and rate my show 5 stars so others may find it. What to be on the show or have an idea for an upcoming episode? Email me at TheKinkPerspective@gmail.com

Find me on Substack - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Enhanced-Mind's Substack | Chris C. | Substack⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you are looking for a therapist that is knowledgeable about the lifestyle, or just a therapist in general, please feel free to reach out through my website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://enhanced-mind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

I have a book out, Tangled Desires: Exploring the Intersection of BDSM and Psychology. Can find it where you purchase most of your ebooks. Print version out now!

#BDSM #Psychology #Renegotiation #Evolution

On today’s show, I discuss what happens when love and erotic identity don’t align. Can a relationship survive when one partner is kinky and the other isn’t? I explore the emotional split, the impact of performative dynamics, the hope that love can “convert” desire, and the quiet cost of suppressing who you are to stay connected. This is an honest look at erotic mismatch, self-abandonment, and what it really means to compromise.

Continue the discussion on Fetlife: @Enhanced-Mind

Don't forget to hit the follow button and rate my show 5 stars so others may find it. What to be on the show or have an idea for an upcoming episode? Email me at TheKinkPerspective@gmail.com

Find me on Substack - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Enhanced-Mind's Substack | Chris C. | Substack⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you are looking for a therapist that is knowledgeable about the lifestyle, or just a therapist in general, please feel free to reach out through my website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://enhanced-mind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

I have a book out, Tangled Desires: Exploring the Intersection of BDSM and Psychology. Can find it where you purchase most of your ebooks. Print version out now!

#BDSM #Psychology #Relationships #Erotic #Desires #Alignment

On today’s show, I discuss the growing misuse of trauma language in kink education and why it’s more than just a trend. From burnout worksheets shared without context to influencers offering therapy-adjacent advice without credentials, we’re exploring where personal experience stops and clinical responsibility begins. I break down the differences between trauma-informed and trauma-specific work, the risks of therapeutic mimicry, and how unqualified voices are reshaping safety in BDSM communities. Whether you’re a teacher, leader, or participant, this episode is about discernment, accountability, and protecting the integrity of healing.

Continue the discussion on Fetlife: @Enhanced-Mind

Don't forget to hit the follow button and rate my show 5 stars so others may find it. What to be on the show or have an idea for an upcoming episode? Email me at TheKinkPerspective@gmail.com

Find me on Substack - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Enhanced-Mind's Substack | Chris C. | Substack⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you are looking for a therapist that is knowledgeable about the lifestyle, or just a therapist in general, please feel free to reach out through my website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://enhanced-mind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

I have a book out, Tangled Desires: Exploring the Intersection of BDSM and Psychology. Can find it where you purchase most of your ebooks. Print version out now!

#BDSM #Psychology #Trauma #Education #Responsibility