“True power is not dependent upon the invented honors of earth. True power is that which guides, shapes, carves, and claims the souls of men. And the souls of men are most often won and lost at the feet of mothers.” - Kimberly Ells

Does it feel like its harder to be a parent today than ever before? There are powers arrayed against the family - powers in secular philosophies, modern politics, and even our education system. The roots of these forces are deep and have been growing for years, but we are just now seeing their ugly fruit. We would like you to take some time to comprehend how these philosophies have affected your understanding of the roles of mothers, fathers, children, and the family as a social unit. This podcast was inspired by and draws from The Invincible Family by Kimberly Ells. The world needs parents more than ever! We hope this conversation inspires you to double down on being an intentional, and therefore, invincible family.

• What is the ultimate goal of socialism, feminism, and sexual radicalism? To separate children from their parents by deceiving parents into giving up their rights to their children.

• Satan wants us to feel quaint, small, and insignificant. But the reality is that if we are going to change this world, we need to believe that what we are doing is mighty and important, and IRREPLACEABLE.

• Children are the future. Every revolutionary wants to control the children. Whoever controls the children controls the society. So the parent/child bond needs to be broken for secular forces to control our children.

• First, it started with Dad. Now they are working on unseating moms, taking her out of the home, denigrating having children, and being a mother.

• The best thing you can give your child is not education - the best you can give your child is YOU.

• Women cannot do everything men can do. And confident women are perfectly fine with this fact.

God has selected you uniquely to be the mother for these children. He will equip you for the work He wants you to do!

No one feels prepared to be a parent. Even if you were one of the oldest of 10 kids in a Catholic family (like Alicia or Katie) or a family of 7 (like Suzanne) you can never really be ready! The key to surviving, and even thriving, is stepping fully into your identity as a daughter of God. All the love that we have for our spouse and children needs to come from a deep place of confident love from our Heavenly Father. Listen in to this interview with Suzanne Bilodeau, author of She Loved: Resting in the Beauty of Motherhood, a compilation of letters from older mothers to their younger selves. In our conversation we talk about actually NOT finding our identity in our motherhood, but in our daughterhood, how fear is a liar, and the importance of compassion for yourself.

• Fear is a liar. Satan tells you that you are not enough. God says - I made you for this moment.

• We can be transformed when we recognize that before we are a wife or mommy we are a daughter. That is foundational.

• We all need to have compassion for ourselves. This is a theme found in most of the letters written for She Loved!

• Don’t be a martyr to your motherhood. Take time for yourself to reconnect with God and others.

'Cause I love you more than you could know

And your heart, it grows every time it breaks

I know that it might sound strange

But I wish you pain

- “Wish You Pain” by Andy Grammar

Every parent wants to keep their kids safe, but is it possible to keep them “too safe”? In this podcast episode we dive into the overwhelming cult of safety-ism, which makes keeping your child from all pain and suffering an idol. Children are really “antifragile” - meaning that they need to have an appropriate amount of stress physically, mentally and emotionally to be able to become resilient. Over-protecting and keeping kids from physical or emotional pain only makes them more anxious and risk-averse. We have lots of examples of giving kids freedom, and the results aren’t always what you think! Like so much of parenting, you need to keep in mind the stage of development your child is in to be able to expose them to appropriate risks. You don’t let your 12 yr old wander down a dark alley, but you should let them go into the grocery store alone. Listen in for some encouragement as well as tips and tricks to not keeping your kids safe, but making them strong!

• Do all you can to keep kids in Discover Mode. Exploring is what kids do and it will keep them curious and confident.

• Don’t keep them safe, make them strong. Children will get hurt, get sick, get disappointed, cry with frustration…. Because they are human!

• Attachment to parents is key to give kids a secure base

• Fearful parenting keeps kids close too much and for too long

• Children need play-based childhood.

1. How were we raised? Were we raised in a home that was in Discovery Mode or Defend Mode?

2. Assess our family right now in light of safety vs. appropriate risk. How are our children being raised?

3. What can we do to improve our family’s Discovery Mode for the long term benefit of our children?

Our vows are for life, and we need overwhelming grace to live them out - Kevin Wells

If you ever thought your marriage was in such bad shape that you simply did not know what to do, this podcast is for you. We were so blessed to be able to talk to Kevin Wells, the author of The Hermit: The Priest Who Saved a Soul, a Marriage, and a Family. This interview is deep because Kevin and his wife Krista have been through the fire together and it is only by the grace of God that they both survived. Our discussion includes the indissolubility of the marriage vows, how marriage makes you holy sometimes by bringing you to the desert, and the powerful role that our priests can take in shepherding our souls and bringing Jesus to us. Kevin’s perspective is incredibly hopeful because he has seen the power of God! Take time to listen to his story and use the lessons he gives to draw closer to the source of life for all of our marriages - the Lord Himself.

• When a person experiences shame, they always need an outlet for that shame. Sometimes its themselves and people turn inward, and sometimes it is someone else.

• Satan is a total jerk. He uses wounds from our childhood, when we were innocent victims, to beat us up and tell us the lie that we are not worthy of love.

• Every addiction is hiding a wound. To be truly free from addiction, that wound needs to be healed.

• When you are in the “desert” of a troubled marriage, the only way to get through is complete reliance on God. He calls us deeper into the desert to rest, abide, and surrender.

• Our vows are for life and this is an impossible task. It can only be accomplished by the grace of God

• Priests are custodians of the souls of those within their parish. When one of these souls is in error, they need the Holy Spirit to speak with firmness and candor. Anything less is false charity and false mercy.

1. Are there areas of our life or marriage that aren’t completely surrendered to God? How can we surrender everything to Him?

2. Are there priests in our lives who are true shepherds to us? How can we support and love our priest better?

https://ignatius.com/the-hermit-hermp/

What is the rhythm of leadership in your family?

Every relationship relies on communication, but when you operate as a family with many members, communication can become difficult! Kids can get lost in the chaos, plans get forgotten, chores undone, and mom and dad are constantly putting out fires. In comes the miracle of the Family Meeting! Well, let’s rephrase that… A family meeting will not solve ALL your problems but it is a great step forward in leading your family and living life intentionally. In this podcast, we discuss the REAL purpose of a family meeting (and it’s not about information shared!) and how effective meetings can satisfy one of the three fundamental needs of the human person. Listen in to find out why you need to get this on your family’s calendar today.

1. FMs give you an opportunity to lead intentionally and gives children the experience of belonging, a fundamental need

2. Start with Prayer and Engagement

3. Present something briefly - your observations, information or inspiration. Keep in mind your family’s values

4. Hear from the kids - This is key. It is where they will feel seen and heard.

5. Get on the same page - coordinate the running of the home

6. Commit to it and make it happen - don’t give up! Depend on grace!

1. How would a family meeting benefit us right now?

2. What is the best time for us to do this?

3. What would be the key elements for us?

If forgiveness isn’t hard, you aren’t doing it right - Dan Meola

Many parents struggle with their children--not because of the kids, but because of the wounds they are carrying from their own parents. The only path for healing those wounds is forgiveness. But how do we forgive, especially when the hurts are deep and real? In this podcast we sat down with Dan Meola, the founder of Life Giving Wounds, a ministry for adult children of divorce. We talked about the importance of forgiveness, what it is--and what it is not. To define true forgiveness, Dan walks us through the seven marks of forgiveness that bring insight to this path to true reconciliation and healing.

• No matter how you have been hurt you need to let go of the grudge and forgive. Unforgiveness hurts us, hurts those around us, and prevents our healing.

• If forgiveness isn’t hard, you aren’t doing it right.

• Christianity is the only religion that requires forgiveness, even if it is unilateral. This is impossible by human standards and can only be done by God’s grace.

• The Seven Marks are:

1. It is specific

2. It is an ongoing process.

3. Can be unilateral

4. Means you still have boundaries

5. It is a choice, not a feeling

6. Enables you to let go of anger, resentment, and to cancel past debts

7. Is only possible with the grace of God

“If we accept that God’s love is unconditional, that the Father’s love cannot be bought or sold, then we will become capable of showing boundless love and forgiving others even if they have wronged us” - Pope Francis in Amoris Laetitia

Becoming a husband and father is the biggest change a man goes through in his life. There is simply no better “life-coaching” than family life! But when men find their vocation difficult, it is usually their wives that they turn to or who observe this difficulty and have a desire to help. In this podcast, we hear from women who have questions about how to support and help their husbands overcome challenges at work, at home, and in their personal lives. So many wives want their husbands to be the best men they can be and overcome vices of sloth, anger, and lust but they aren’t sure how to help. Sometimes wives can take action, but in other situations, it's best for wives to be supportive and keep their advice to themselves. When do you know which is right? Listen in to find out!

1. Wives need to be very careful when it comes to giving husbands advice or correction regarding his relationship with work. It is a source of great respect for men, so this topic should be delicately considered.

2. Men need to be needed. If wives are doing everything and then complaining that he isn’t stepping up, realize that you are probably doing too much.

3. Overcoming anger requires introspection and being curious about why it arises within you at certain times. Usually the “trigger” is not really your child, but something that your child is doing or saying that is touching an unresolved issue in yourself.

4. We need to take time to think about these things and give ourselves space to consider them and bring God into that situation so He can heal us.

5. If you have a husband who is at a different place spiritually than you, be patient. Honor his journey as being different from your own.

“You’re not just parenting your children… you are parenting your grandchildren”

Have you ever walked through a thousand-year-old castle or along a wall built by Romans nearly a millennium ago? On a recent trip to the UK, we were struck by the longevity of these structures—and the intentionality behind them. They weren’t built to last a season, but centuries.

In this episode, we challenge you to think the same way about your family culture. Are you parenting just for today… or are you building something that will bless your children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren?

Family culture is the invisible architecture of your home. It gives your children identity, belonging, and purpose. It's what lasts long after the rules and schedules fade. And if we build it with care, rooted in faith and virtue, it can be a source of strength for generations to come.

• Parenting is more than just what is happening today. We have to have a long term vision for our family

• Your family culture matters more than ever. This is where children learn who they are, where they belong, and what they are made for

• If we want to build a legacy, we need to build with stone, not straw or wood. Set up traditions that can be passed on to the next generation - things that are simple and repeatable.

• Consider the legacy that you have received from your family, culture, and especially from our Catholic faith.

• Legacy doesn’t happen by accident. It starts with small, intentional acts of love—right now.

1. Consider writing down some thoughts on the legacy you want to leave.

2. What’s one tradition, habit, or value you want to start building into your family this week that will move you closer to that legacy?